To be revelling in playing my newly acquired 'well I work full time too' card!

[broomers]

At the end of last year I went back to work full time after having done 3 days a week and 2 stints of may leave over the last year.
DH is pretty good round the house but it's more the mental load/mothers load that I'm currently offloading some of onto him!
Little things like tonight he said we need to get DS hair cut (which he hates) and thinks we should get a mobile hairdresser to the house, previously statements like this would see me take that on to arrange so I simply said yes let me know when it's booked for, his face looked so confused 😂 it's been happening like that for the last month and obviously I still do my fair share but having help out with cleaning and school drop offs etc and general life admin has been a real eye opener at how much mental capacity it takes.
Somewhat lighthearted but guess my AIBU is should I enjoy it as much as do when I get to play the I work full time too now card!

YANBU X

I bloody love this! YANBU!

More strength to you! Fabulous work and quick thinking!

Currently doing 3 days a week and CANNOT wait for this!! Good on ya!

Love it! Keep it up!

Brilliant OP.

Ive done this with anything related to his family and also with holidays. If he mentions that something would be nice, I agree and ask him if he wants my input before he books something.

I went back to full time in 2021, and DH has got used to me responding to stuff suggested by him with, ‘ OK, well you spearhead that’.

To be fair, he then does.

Correct response to any conversation where the other adult suggests ‘we’
should do or look into or research something. Brava! Keep it up.

This has happened in our house too, I used to be part time so it was easy to be organised and get things done, it’s normally me that deals with everything eg car mot, car service, childrens dentists appointments etc and now I’m working full time I’ve told him he needs to deal with his car and I’ll deal with mine for mot, service etc, mot booked and he now says he needs to take a day unpaid to do it, I replied ok. Not sure he is enjoying me working full time 😂

Well done.

I just read a Swedish pamphlet about gender equality in the house, which says there are 3 steps to every job: noticing it needs to be done, planning it, doing it. At least your husband is now doing step 1…

Love it. I have started to do this with dh more. Everything was left to me including his families card and gift drop off for birthdays and in the last 6 months he has been told to get on with as x needs done or y is having a party so he can take the kids.

Don't show your Aces too soon

Father and Son having their matching haircuts - fab idea!

Glad to hear it's not just me, I do love hearing these stories!

Hurray!

Giggling at 'spearhead'. I'm going to use that!

I do this even though I'm on mat leave 🙈 we both agreed to the kids so I'm not taking on full responsibility for everything. Took a long time to get there though! Initially I think mat leave was seen as a holiday so I left him with both kids at teatime while I went out for drinks....its not considered a holiday anymore 😂

“Good idea love, thanks for organising that” 👌😄

I bloody love it when l do overtime and get to play this card!!

Keep on fighting the good fight op!!!

I do 4 days a week and this is my go to response! WE decided to a baby so WE have to do things. I do most of the mental load but drop offs, pick ups, groups organising babysitting etc is a WE job.

I had this with my ex-husband. When I worked term time, I would have the kids, etc, and do the drop off/pick ups if they were staying at his. He made "comments" for years that i didn't do as much as him because i didn't work full time. When I went back full time, though, he suddenly realised he had to do more of the load and in school holidays had to step up as the free childcare (me) was working.

Yes me too and also loving it 😆

Also work ft so totally love this approach. I dropped everything to do with his family presents, cards, gifts and it caused a massive rift as dh kept forgetting nephews birthdays. Apparently this is all my fault but one fewer job so meh.

I already do this to an extent but am looking very much forward to Dh starting paternity leave and my going back to work. I will no longer be able to open mail, do weekday laundry, pick things up and put them away, tidy kids rooms, swap out clothing sizes, sort cupboards, and all the things that apparently you can’t do if you’re the only one at home or just never could do because man. I will still do most of the finances because they are important, ive done the enrolment in activities for the kids, but I’ve stopped holiday planning so we’ve missed out on cheap accom for next summer already. And so much of the thinking!! We aren’t going to Ed Sheeran since Dh sent me the details and said this would be fun and I didn’t get around to replying much less sorting it, a month or so later he said how it would have been good and I agreed and he was surprised that if I thought so I hadn’t magically made it happen. I’m willing to miss out on ed Sheeran to remind Dh I’m not the house slave.

Keep the ‘corporate speak’ going at home.

Came on to see what "my I work full time cardi " looked like!

I love a good cardigan, I do.