to think there are a LOT of harsh, angry people on MN at the moment?

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I've been on MN under various user names for over 12 years and I am struck by the vitriolic posts made by so many posters these days. It seems that so many people are angry and bitter and take pleasure in spreading this around.

I don't remember it being like this before. AIBU was, perhaps, more predominantly light hearted. These days it's an ugly pile on usually at the expense of some vulnerable person who has posted for advice / help.

There's such harsh tone to so many people's responses and it growing worse.

It this a symptom of increasingly difficult circumstances for so many people these days? I am not British and it's jarring to read so many hard line stances and so many fractured family dynamics.

What's going on with people? Where's the empathy gone?

Here*

Yes

Yes

Meh, it’s always had its moments and I’ve been on here for about 14 years under various guises. AIBU has always been a place people get flamed. I think since ‘penis beaker’ a lot of what appears to be misogynistic men, bored teens and general trolls have joined purely just to goad and inflict pain where possible.

It’s awful. I’ve been here 10 years and it wasn’t like this when I joined.
I still post because I’m thick skinned and but my god even an inane thread about what’s for dinner can turn into a rabid fight in here now.

I have to take breaks because I find the misery and anti man attitude seeps into me if I spend to long on here and it starts effecting how I act towards my husband and how I react to other people.

You are correct. These miserable times are bringing out the worst in folks.

People are angry, miserable and all kinds of angry and it just spews everywhere.

Me too please @lightand

There does seem to be a lot of spiteful people on here yes. It’s definitely gotten worse (I’ve noticed since lockdown). I just assume they must be miserable and have no where to vent their anger so they take it out on people on here. I hope it’s not actually representative of real people.

I'm new to MN so nothing to compare to however I don't find it particularly better or worse than other forums.
I thought the whole idea of AIBU is you are literally asking someone to judge you so I'd expect judgement. 🤔
I may be mistaken but it seems sometimes people post on AIBU just for a grumble or natter and they're not really asking if they're being unreasonable, what they're looking for is people to say 'oh yes, he's horrible, or MIL is out of order'. Shouldn't these type if posts be for maybe Relatiinships (still navigating)?
I feel its quite appropriate to say YABU for putting up with this shit!

Totally, 100% agree! Completely agree, it's VILE!
I'm a widowed, disabled parent so on a low income and posted to ask if a vets bill was thought to be accurate before I query it with the vets and OMG. It wasn't even AIBU but I was ripped to shreds! I didn't bite back at all but was still accused of animal cruelty (for calling the nearest vets immediately and driving straight round for an emergency appointment...!)
I had posters saying nonsense "You've upset a lot of people tonight by making this up" and was troll hunted SO MUCH that MNHQ night bot had to hide my thread until morning!
Not a single thing I said was untrue and thankfully my thread was reinstated but honestly, I was in tears. It was horrendous.

MNHQ had to put a warning that posters would be having their accounts suspended if it carried on. Never seen them say that on a thread before!

I think it’s always been like this tbh

This is part of it, yes. A lot of posters mistake the AIBU board for an idle chat forum.

I too would appreciate a DM, please! Same as Claudine, the faux-incredulous posts about social housing and benefits are so mean girl.

I've not found it too bad lately, but I hide a lot of topics... actually most topics 😂. I also hide threads when they start getting weird, fat phobic, someone a bit obsessive appears or whatever

The relationship board isn’t much better than AIBU anymore imo. That should be a very supportive place but it doesn’t feel like it anymore!

Would someone else who had been pm’d pass on a pm to me so I don’t have to hassle that poster (who might be getting irritated at all the admin 😅)

The whole site, bar a few safe corners, is now treated as one big AIBU

It's quite a different tone from 12 years ago

I don’t really know what this site stands for anymore tbh. It’s not a welcoming place for new mothers at all.

Could I ask for the same 😅

Lot of people want to jump ship 😆

That’s how bad it is!

True. I noticed that people say "YABU" outside AIBU, so it spread everywhere.

I actually left for a year because I didn’t think it was healthy to be constantly reading about other peoples dramas, but then I had covid and nothing to do so I’m back in the habit 😬

I think MN just reflects real life - people are so much more angry, more insular and less tolerant these days. I see it in those around me when reactions are so extreme: someone behaving badly is automatically a 'narc' , a political view you don't like is 'fascism'. I tend to keep away from people like that , they just want to be angry and drag everyone else down with them.

I suspect social media carries a lot of the blame here, echo chambers and social bubbles mean that we are less exposed to a range of views, and the tribalism that goes with it means a lot of people seem to find a view other than their own is threatening, and react accordingly.

It's quite sad really.

I agree to that too. I posted for the first time under another username right in the middle of my PND and I was ripped to shreds and called a spoiled brat. That was 5 years ago btw.

This is interesting. I have just started on mumsnet a few days ago. I’m older with grown up children, and tbh I’ve been taken aback by the meanness and bossiness of some responses, to the point where I’ve begun to worry how my kids will cope if their partners turn out to have the same sorts of attitudes when problems occur in their lives. However I hadn’t realised that the AIBU thing might be more designed for an argument between two sides to start up

That’s awful. So sorry that happened to you. A couple of years ago I got ripped to shreds when pregnant and was told I’d be a shit mum because I was selfish (I’m not and I’m a great mum, thankfully I didn’t let it get to me too much but bloody hell) HQ let all the bitchy comments stand.