8 year old & breastfeeding

[Boobi]

NC as it could be quite contentious...

I've had my baby 6 months ago and I breastfeed. A couple of times when my 8 year old DN has been over she has said & done a couple of things which make me uneasy.

I'm a ftm and obv not used to breastfeeding, but feel very comfortable in my own home around family, so am quite open about it.

DN keeps trying to kiss DS on the cheek while he is latched on and I gently asked her not to while he is busy. She did this on a few visits.

Another time she was pretending to be DS and jumped on my lap in a breastfeeding position and actually bit my boob!

Before her sibling arrived DN has asked if she can have some milk, which I have said no to which she questioned and told me "mummy's going to let me".

DSIL (DN mum) has just had her second baby a week ago and has been in hospital.
Yesterday DN said she couldn't wait to see her so she can have more "booby milk".

Now I understand being curious and trying a bit, but honestly I think she's meaning full on breastfeeding.

It's not my plan, but I can also understand if she has been continuously breastfeed for 8 years, but the fact she's been weaned for around 5/6 years, the thought of her breastfeeding again makes me really uneasy.

I'm not overly close to DSIL but I could imagine she would breastfeed her older DC if that's what DC wanted.

I will try to find out weather she has just tried some, is drinking expressed milk regularly or is actually drinking from the breast.

What do you think?

YABU - it's her child and breastfeeding is perfectly natural at any age & stage.

YANBU - Yuck, it's not right to breastfeed a child who has been weaned for over 5 years.

Looks like it did. Animal instinct, isn't it?

I BF my eldest until 2.5. I wish I didn't think this but 8 does make me feel a bit uncomfortable.

However, I wouldn't get involved

@Cuppasoupmonster What were you trying to insinuate then?

Ok let me ask you something, would you be happy for your DH/DP to still be breastfed by his
mum? If not, why not?

I highly doubt that she really will BF again but I do think that your niece may be feeling somewhat displaced (I hate the word 'jealous' when it comes to children and new babies - it seems clear to me that their place in the family gets redefined, familial attention changes and as children, they don't have the emotional intelligence to rationalise this).
With that in mind, rather than dismissing this as 'none of your business', I'd say take your niece's behaviour as a sign that she may need a little extra attention. All behaviour happens for a reason.

I’m breastfeeding my just turned 3 toddler. We are in the process of stopping. I would have rather stopped at 6-12 months but like someone already said, it’s not black and white. Personally I wouldn’t be doing it for an 8 year old but in this instance, it wouldn’t be my business what SIL and DN do. So I wouldn’t ask any questions.

Unrelated and tmi but: RE the latch as so many on here have said how older children lose the inability to latch. I don’t know if I’m proud or embarrassed that my DH has a good latch 😆 😈 sorry to lower the tone!

Why haven’t you answered my question? What were you suggesting with your comment?

8 year old don't know not to assault others? Give over. No child over the age of 2 should be biting.

And as for you calling the OP's body 'food' - talk about dehumanising. An 8 year old does not see her aunt's body as 'food', an 8 year old sees cereal and pizza as food.

I don't know about you, but I'm proud that I provided food to my babies. I wasn't food. I provided food. Good food.

Better than processed rubbish like pizza and cereal, that's for sure.

I'm surprised you have time to go all Miss Marple and investigate this further when you have a 6 month old. Let DNs parents deal with her general behaviour and don't allow her to bite you.

Not your business. She wouldn't be able to latch after this many years and she probably would hate the milk anyway.

If she was my daughter I'd tell her the milk is just for the baby, but I maybe would express a little bit for her to try and probably that would be the end of it.

However, it sounds like it's about attention. She can see babies get more attention than her, so she's trying to get it back.

You make it sound like it's sexual. Its really not. Yes it's weird to breastfeed till 4 year old but nothing sexual about it

Cool story bro

I was suggesting that breastfeeding a school age child is inappropriate. Which isn’t the same as ‘sexual’. Can you answer mine?

No, you didn’t-you said it’s usually boys who are breastfed for longer. Your comment was specifically pertaining to boys. What an odd comment.

Why are you being so childish and rude?

What’s odd is that it’s mainly boys! And it is, anecdotally. Am I wrong?

The plural of anecdote is not data. Evidence please.
Also still have absolutely no idea what your point is.

Well I’m not searching for such a study, you can if you wish. But the posts on here about extended bfing are usually about boys. Just an observation 🤷🏼‍♀️

Of course I don’t wish to search for a study; I don’t believe there’s any basis in it. I’m not the one presenting ridiculous claims as if they’re fact.

It might stun you rigid but on discussion boards, where people swap opinions/observations/anecdotes, not everything needs to be backed up by 20 peer reviewed gold star studies.
I know, it’s nuts.

Of course not. But when you make comments that are clearly intended to insinuate something, then act all wide eyed and innocent like you meant nothing by it, I’m going to comment.
You aren’t going to say what you meant so I am done. Have a wonderful afternoon. 😊

This.

I don’t think it’s sexual. I think it’s indicative of a parent who puts their idea of ‘hippy, wholesome, natural’ parenting before the future embarrassment and discomfort of their child however. It’s egotistical.

Bitty 😋🥛