8 year old & breastfeeding

[Boobi]

NC as it could be quite contentious...

I've had my baby 6 months ago and I breastfeed. A couple of times when my 8 year old DN has been over she has said & done a couple of things which make me uneasy.

I'm a ftm and obv not used to breastfeeding, but feel very comfortable in my own home around family, so am quite open about it.

DN keeps trying to kiss DS on the cheek while he is latched on and I gently asked her not to while he is busy. She did this on a few visits.

Another time she was pretending to be DS and jumped on my lap in a breastfeeding position and actually bit my boob!

Before her sibling arrived DN has asked if she can have some milk, which I have said no to which she questioned and told me "mummy's going to let me".

DSIL (DN mum) has just had her second baby a week ago and has been in hospital.
Yesterday DN said she couldn't wait to see her so she can have more "booby milk".

Now I understand being curious and trying a bit, but honestly I think she's meaning full on breastfeeding.

It's not my plan, but I can also understand if she has been continuously breastfeed for 8 years, but the fact she's been weaned for around 5/6 years, the thought of her breastfeeding again makes me really uneasy.

I'm not overly close to DSIL but I could imagine she would breastfeed her older DC if that's what DC wanted.

I will try to find out weather she has just tried some, is drinking expressed milk regularly or is actually drinking from the breast.

What do you think?

YABU - it's her child and breastfeeding is perfectly natural at any age & stage.

YANBU - Yuck, it's not right to breastfeed a child who has been weaned for over 5 years.

I think DN maybe a bit jealous of the new baby and whilst she’s says she will have breast milk I highly doubt SIL will give her any.

You were saying on another thread that you’re going to buy yourself some breastmilk jewellery and how magical you find breastfeeding, so it’s odd that you’ve suddenly done a total 180.

I agree with Emmamoo89. By the time a child is two it should be eating normal meals and not wanting breastmilk.

My, someone's hungry! 🤣

That's totally fucking different. I can love it and still think it's weird to do it past 2.

You would ignore NHS and WHO advice and stop bf up to or more than an year early because your child can say a few words. It’s an interesting choice.

I have a 5 year old and a new baby. My older child was very curious about breast milk etc and I allowed them to try to latch. They couldn't. I also allowed a taste of expressed milk. They disliked it. Curiousity assuaged, jealousy of baby gone, everyone survived.

I was joking. I'm going to breastfeed him till he's 2 then stop

But I doubt he's going to say boobie before 2 year old but if he learns it I'm not going to stop. People are too serious on here

She bit my boob through my top! I didn't have my boob out at the time.

I have absolutely asserted my boundaries letting her know she can't have my milk as it's for my baby. I have also told her I do not want her touching DS when he's feeding.

Most of the time she's absolutely fine and does ignore that I'm feeding, it's only occasionally she wants to get involved and mentions that her mum will give her some.

@elliejjtiny yes I think you're right in many ways. It is a massive adjustment for her. She has been the centre of SIL world for a long time and now is not so much. I also think SIL wants her to be included still.

All those who suggested it's also none of my business are also right. I'm not going to start probing DN for information!

I know a child who was breast fed at 7. Mum weaned her towards 8. More common in developing countries but not unheard of over here. I couldn’t give a toss tbh.

Yep same I did that with my then 3 year old.

@Snugglemonkey @Nicanabanana this is what I hope is the case for DN too...

You might not give a toss but she will when she’s a grown woman, I imagine she will seriously question her mums motives

@Emmamoo89 my 21 month old DD has been asking for boobie for months now, so I wouldn't be so sure your DC won't be asking for it before 2. And whether or not you want to breastfeed past 2 is your business, but calling it gross is both childish and offensive

And @tillytoodles1 my DD eats proper, full meals, and still breastfeeds. Breastfeeding past 2 is nothing about whether they're eating food.

I agree that it is probably a combination of jealousy and curiosity and most likely will pass. It is indeed very unlikely that an 8 year old would be able to effectively latch on.
I would also agree however that your niece needs to respect your boundaries so I would try to say no in a calm and matter of fact way, but don't make it seem dramatic in any shape or form. She will probably soon get bored of the idea and get used to having the new babies around.
I doubt it's harmful or a sign of anything untoward, but her behaviour is a bit unusual, and more what you might expect from a younger child - has she been used to being the baby of the family? A new sibling and a new cousin might have come as quite a shock to the system if that's the case. I'd try to distract her with other things and make sure she feels valued as it sounds like she is maybe feeling left out and looking for attention.

I voted YABU because it’s precisely fuck all to do with you how other people choose to feed their baby.

Its not childish at all. Everyone is allowed an opinion. I just don't want a 3/4 year old hanging off my tit

I'm not sure you just stop the day they turn 3 anyway. It's not that black and white.

I agree with a pp though, file it under 'none of my business'.

Thank you. I agree. They don't need breast milk past 2

The World Health Organization recommends to “continue frequent, on-demand breastfeeding until 2 years of age or beyond”.
breastfeeding isn’t for everyone, but please don’t post misinformation that continued breastfeeding doesn’t have benefits for babies. I didn’t breastfeed my children until they were 2 but I recognise it does have benefits and I have nothing against those who choose to.

Its not the end the world if you do stop tho. And can get benefits from other things. The benefits won't be as great as before the age of 2

Yeah the mums obviously just said that to shut her up at some stage

Of course it isn’t the end of the world if you stop. And yes, the benefits are greatest in the first 6 months of life, then up until the age of one. But there are many benefits from breastfeeding for however long it continues; antibodies which protect against illness, for example. These benefits cannot be replicated by other things. 😊

None of your business.