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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Asked to move from relatives house

563 replies

OrangeBlankets · 14/01/2023 09:32

I've been living in a relatives house for more than 2 years. When I moved in the relative was in a care home but the person who had POA for them agreed for me to move in and said it was ok for a short time and that I didn't have to pay rent.

Now the house owner died and so did the POA. The executors want me to move out.

I don't have anywhere to go, can they evict me?

OP posts:
SilliusSoddus · 14/01/2023 15:07

flirtygirl · 14/01/2023 12:24

Bitches on mumsnet came out in force on this thread.

Judgemental....

100%

They were falling over themselves in their keeness to give the OP a kicking that half of them never read the bloody OP properly.

Getamoveon36 · 14/01/2023 15:18

OrangeBlankets · 14/01/2023 09:38

The person who died is a grandmother, I've been paying the bills.

I don't have good mental health. I did sign a tenancy agreement with the POA

you don’t get a medal (or a free house) because you paid your own bills.

ChungusBoi · 14/01/2023 15:22

Getamoveon36 · 14/01/2023 15:18

you don’t get a medal (or a free house) because you paid your own bills.

Show quote history

Where exactly does the OP say she is expecting a medal or a free house? 🤷‍♀️

She’s stating facts that may materially affect the advice she receives.

boilthekettle · 14/01/2023 15:22

How are people thinking that the OP would have been able to save much, realistically, if she was unwell and presumably on benefits?

I have never claimed universal credit but surely they wouldn't have just handed the OP the portion meant for housing (so she could save it) because she had no rent - and the UC she received would have been under a hundred quid a week or so?

Not enough to eat and pay bills and for absolutely everything else.

Etoile41 · 14/01/2023 15:26

So they were kind enough to let you stay rent free for 2 years but you say the will was unfair and your grandmother wasn't a kind person?! No need to go to CAB for advice, you need a reality check

uncomfortablydumb53 · 14/01/2023 15:32

Yes they can
The property is part of the relatives estate and will need to be sold
After 2 years living rent free, which is not short term(!) you've had plenty of time to anticipate this happening and save a deposit

Robinni · 14/01/2023 15:41

boilthekettle · 14/01/2023 15:22

How are people thinking that the OP would have been able to save much, realistically, if she was unwell and presumably on benefits?

I have never claimed universal credit but surely they wouldn't have just handed the OP the portion meant for housing (so she could save it) because she had no rent - and the UC she received would have been under a hundred quid a week or so?

Not enough to eat and pay bills and for absolutely everything else.

@boilthekettle if OP has been seriously mentally ill then they would have been on ESA support group (or equivalent UC) and PIP. An amount which would be well in excess of job seekers amount for basic needs and would allow some sort of modest saving or preparation over a 2 1/2 year period. Particularly if OP has been too unwell to go out and about socialise regularly etc., which for seriously mentally ill people is impossible. Also a lot of people with disabilities use some of their PIP towards housing costs and maintenance so they have somewhere suitable - OP hasn’t had to spend money on any maintenance or housing improvements; Granny has covered the lot.

Secondly, OP states they now have a job, though not how long for, but presumably long enough to be making some savings there too.

Thirdly OP has been well aware that the arrangement was not long term and through the last 2 1/2 years, despite illness, there will have been times they could have pursued forward planning, looking to get support grants and lots of other supports in place to move on. But they have chosen to do nothing. And now they are having to live with the very unfortunate consequences.

boilthekettle · 14/01/2023 15:50

@Robinni PIP is notoriously hard to get for many disabled people. Mandatory reconsiderations are frequently denied but awarded at tribunals which can take over a year of waiting to happen.

Also, being disabled is expensive - it is literally why PIP is not means tested, as it is supposed to level the playing field (if you can actually get it...) and meet the costs that non disabled people don't have. Disabled people have various expenses that you are not allowing for in your argument for why OP should have been fine to save a hefty deposit.

Forward planning? Perhaps the OP could have done more, we don't know the extent of her difficulties. However, you do realise that plenty of physical and mental illnesses can sap your capacity for all kinds of executive function/ getting tasks done?

This thread seems to be full of posters determinedly ignoring the fact that people with mental illness often behave like people coping with mental illness, and just writing OP off as bringing this on herself.

ivykaty44 · 14/01/2023 15:59

Yes I have a copy of the tenancy agreement and there is a gas certificate.

if the gas certificate is within date then it would be possible to serve a section 21 to evict you. They will need to serve the section 21 correctly, if anything isn't correct then the 56 days of waiting for them will be a waste as at the point you. can inform them and the process starts again

did you pay a deposit at the beginning of the tenancy and if so is the deposit in a deposit scheme? If the deposit was paid and not entered into a deposit scheme then legally the landlord is not able to serve a section 21 to evict you

TheMightyOak · 14/01/2023 16:01

Florissant · 14/01/2023 14:43

Only a very selfish, entitled person would do that.

Oh, wait.

Show quote history

Exactly!!

Buck your ideas up OP. You’ve had plenty of time to sort something out, so now’s the time to do it!!

DelphiniumBlue · 14/01/2023 16:04

You need proper legal advice from Shelter or a solicitor.
You tenancy agreement may or may not be enforceable, and the executors may need a court order to get you out. They may have to give notice under the terms of the tenancy agreement, or it may be that you are an occupier with very few rights. Without seeing the actual tenancy agreement no one can say.
Do not take advice from all the randoms on here giving their opinion on what they think should be the case! Lots of the replies are given with very little knowledge of the actual law.

SeemsSoUnfair · 14/01/2023 16:09

I can absolutely see how this set up for perfect for you, but it was obviously only ever going to be be short term until the owner died. The beneficiaries rightly expect the estate to be processed and distributed as per her will. You have been very naïve not to have put plans in place over the last two year for this.

If you have a tenancy agreement you should get notice of when to leave, and you could stay until they evict you, but that is just delaying the inevitable. Start speaking to shelter, citizens advice and your council to see if they can point you in the direction of support for your situation.

Florissant · 14/01/2023 16:18

ivykaty44 · 14/01/2023 15:59

Yes I have a copy of the tenancy agreement and there is a gas certificate.

if the gas certificate is within date then it would be possible to serve a section 21 to evict you. They will need to serve the section 21 correctly, if anything isn't correct then the 56 days of waiting for them will be a waste as at the point you. can inform them and the process starts again

did you pay a deposit at the beginning of the tenancy and if so is the deposit in a deposit scheme? If the deposit was paid and not entered into a deposit scheme then legally the landlord is not able to serve a section 21 to evict you

Good grief. The most idiotic post yet and that takes some doing.

StarDolphins · 14/01/2023 16:22

ThinWomansBrain · 14/01/2023 11:26

two years?
what was your interpretation of a short period?

And you've been paying your bills while living there rent free - that's so generous of you

Thats a bit mean. Op was saying she was the one paying the bills in response to a question .

2bazookas · 14/01/2023 16:27

They don't need to "evict" you ( a timeconsuming legal process). You've never paid rent, you're not a tenant, you have no rights.

A guest who overstayed and has been told to leave, has no permission to be in the property. If you don't leave when told , they will call police to remove you.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 14/01/2023 16:28

I’m guessing here… but it sounds like the OP’s mother was POA who installed the OP in the house. If that’s the case I would assume that this has not been a popular situation with the rest of the family for quite some time. Could Grandma not have used that rent money or house equity for her care? Even if she didn’t the beneficiaries are probably not happy that the estate could have had 2 years worth of rent. There’s also the unknown of the the maintenance for the past few years as well as current state of the house.

Based on the comments from the OP she sounds very unrealistic and unreasonable.

Hayliebells · 14/01/2023 16:32

So a family let you live in their relative's house for free, for two years, and you're being arsey about moving out when (not unreasonably) asked to? Where's the gratitude for what you've have been given so far?! Just accept thank them for letting you live there this long and move out with dignity. Honestly, some people.

kateandme · 14/01/2023 16:33

Jesus Christ. Do any of you being absolute cruel fuckers realise there is a person on the end of this thread that came asking for advice.rightly or wrongly they are about to be evicted.rightly or wrongly with nowhere to go.
Also they HAVE mentioned not being mentally well.are you aware what this level of cruelnnes can push people to do.
Just where is the compassion.
people fuck up.
People make stupid mistakes.
Or people are Ill,given somewhere to live thank goodness and just feel so grateful, and so are terrified when suddenly it stops.
And for whatever reason,probably the illness mentioned haven't saved up or mannedup,got over themselves,stopped being ill, worked for their money.🙄
What would you do if faced with homelessness through right now no fault of your own?

ivykaty44 · 14/01/2023 16:44

@Florissant

why the fuck is it idiotic - the op asked a question and ive answered - looking at most of this thread its a pile on with pearl clutching at the idea of someone down on their luck for one reason and another and they are castling their opinions far and wide so everyone knows what they think, whilst not actually doing any answering of the question asked

what was your really helpful advice to op?

AlmondBake · 14/01/2023 16:45

@kateandme - well said.

Robinni · 14/01/2023 16:48

boilthekettle · 14/01/2023 15:50

@Robinni PIP is notoriously hard to get for many disabled people. Mandatory reconsiderations are frequently denied but awarded at tribunals which can take over a year of waiting to happen.

Also, being disabled is expensive - it is literally why PIP is not means tested, as it is supposed to level the playing field (if you can actually get it...) and meet the costs that non disabled people don't have. Disabled people have various expenses that you are not allowing for in your argument for why OP should have been fine to save a hefty deposit.

Forward planning? Perhaps the OP could have done more, we don't know the extent of her difficulties. However, you do realise that plenty of physical and mental illnesses can sap your capacity for all kinds of executive function/ getting tasks done?

This thread seems to be full of posters determinedly ignoring the fact that people with mental illness often behave like people coping with mental illness, and just writing OP off as bringing this on herself.

@boilthekettle I have plenty of experience dealing with DLA/PIP for various family members over the years. If you are genuinely in need, follow the guidance available online/via CAB and are able to provide medical reports/scripts/witness statements etc it is generally acceptable.

For goodness sake are you honestly saying that OP, who is working, is incapable of saving up less than a grand over a 2 1/2 year period??

I have oodles of experience with disabled people, their problems and mental illness.

If she is capable of looking after a dog and maintaining employment, she is capable of picking up the phone and asking citizens advice for help!

saltinesandcoffeecups · 14/01/2023 16:48

kateandme · 14/01/2023 16:33

Jesus Christ. Do any of you being absolute cruel fuckers realise there is a person on the end of this thread that came asking for advice.rightly or wrongly they are about to be evicted.rightly or wrongly with nowhere to go.
Also they HAVE mentioned not being mentally well.are you aware what this level of cruelnnes can push people to do.
Just where is the compassion.
people fuck up.
People make stupid mistakes.
Or people are Ill,given somewhere to live thank goodness and just feel so grateful, and so are terrified when suddenly it stops.
And for whatever reason,probably the illness mentioned haven't saved up or mannedup,got over themselves,stopped being ill, worked for their money.🙄
What would you do if faced with homelessness through right now no fault of your own?

I can mention that I’m mentally unwell but that doesn’t mean I can rock up to a vacant house and expect to live for free for 2 years.

What I think is cruel is to collude with a family member to cheat a physically unwell grandmother in a care home out of 12-24K of income. And then try to cheat the beneficiaries out of their inheritance.

Nanatokidsdogshampsters · 14/01/2023 16:49

@kateandme anyone with any common sense when told that they could stay in this house rent free for a SHORT period as the OP stated would at least be

A) grateful
B) save some money for when it's time to move out.
C) as soon as the owner died move out asap.

If you don't understand wills it's a legal requirement that the executors have to follow the instructions of the deceased. It doesn't matter that the OP has health issues they surely would have known when moving in that the grandparent would die one day.
Also the OP hasn't started if the other beneficiaries knew she wasn't paying rent.
If it's 2 years that would have been more money to account for probate.

2bazookas · 14/01/2023 16:53

Funkyblues101 · 14/01/2023 13:48

The homeowner died, the POA died... Surely the news that you had to move out did not come as a surprise?

Have you misinterpreted that as "two people died", Granny and her Attorney?

A Lasting Power of Attorney only remains valid during the lifetime of the person who made it. It ends when the person who granted it dies.

The Executor of the Will is now in charge of Granny's estate.

ivykaty44 · 14/01/2023 16:53

kateandme. I should think the op has hidden the thread by now as its clear most on here are out to bash the op and not offer the answers to the questions asked, or a way to move forward. If op could get evicted in the proper way then she/he may have a chance of being housed. Some have offered help but most seemed to relish on a Saturday afternoon in sticking the boot in to someone with mental health issues.