I know I am AIBU, but whenever child-free ppl complain about being tired I get annoyed, barring medical/health issues

[worldenoughandtime]

This is just a secret confession here, in the anonymity of the internet, and I hope I have enough social skills to disguise my true feelings. Which is of extreme annoyance when child-free people complain about being tired (given there are no aggravating health concerns). (In my social circle at least, people complain about being tired and busy all the time).

The tiredness that comes with managing kids - especially more than one, and especially for lone/single parents of which there seems to be more and more- is just on a different level. Needed to get that off my chest.

YABVU and talking utter bollocks. The idea that health conditions are the only reason that could make a childfree person as tired as a parent of children is very clearly total bullshit.

There are plenty of jobs, not to mention other unpaid responsibilities, which are just as tiring as looking after children. Looking after my two dc was largely a pleasure, and was certainly a piece of cake compared to being at work.

And aside from all that, tiredness isn't a competition. Anyone is allowed to be tired for any reason, including things they chose to do (like have children!). Stop being such a martyr!

And yes I’m also menopausal which is the pits

There are different types of tired and none of them trumps, or is more worthy than any other type.

In my teens I was knackered because I stayed up studying.

In my early 20's I would often be exhausted because I'd been out drinking all night.

Then young children happened and I was tired because they didn't sleep.

Now my children are older and I'm shattered every day because I have a new job which is very mentally demanding.

Child free people also suffer from the physical feeling of not getting enough sleep, but they have it for different reasons which are just as valid as child based reasons.

My most tired was when I was young, single and running a nightclub from 9-4 am and then a pub from 10 the same morning until midnight, four days a week. Being a single parent to a 4 year old is nothing to that.

I think the idea of not getting a single night of unbroken sleep for several years is the thing that's hard for those with young children. You literally never get a break.

I was more exhausted at times when I did a job with 4 consecutive 15 hour night shifts each week, but I handed in my notice after 8 months!

Moaning about being tired is just conversation though. Like moaning about the weather. Don't take it so personally!

I work with children all day, and have done every day over my 12 year career. Lots of them in one room. I go back to my child free home and collapse in exhaustion.
I regularly have my nieces to stay. Yep, very tiring. I get it.

It’s also pretty exhausting being single in yours 30s and seeing everyone else around you build their lovely little families and trying so hard to get to that point yourself and failing and wondering why. It’s pretty exhausting trying to conceive children while surrounded by people making comments such as the OP and desperately wanting that yourself.

It’s tiring having to cover your colleagues who are off with sick children or off to their child’s sports day on the busiest day of the work year.

Its tiring working 12 hour days without a break.

Its so tiring having to care for family - any family. It’s tiring working and commuting and only seeing your home in the dark. It’s tiring sometimes just to be alive and make ends meet. It’s tiring having to fit everything in life in.

Everyone can be tired OP. It’s not a competition. It’s not just physical occurrences that make you tired either.

YABU
I get annoyed when people with kids think they have the monopoly on being tired. It is not a competition.

Well depends on the circumstances. I have twins and when they were newborn and needing feeding every 2 hours one after the other through the night we had MIL come stay with us for a weekend to "help" (she didn't help she just wanted to see her GC which is totally fine but annoyed me she called it helping!) And she came down at 8.30 am saying "could you stick the kettle on love I'm really tired this morning" I could quite happily have agreed with your entire OP 😆

We had this thread recently. It didn't go well and this one is going even more badly.

In fact it's annoying me now just remembering!

What about childless people who are carers for elderly parents? Are they entitled to be knackered?!

Quite. Try the panic of the landline ringing at 12:30am because your dad with dementia doesn't realise what time it is, and then when you've dealt with that lying awake till your alarm goes off at 6:30 for work because you're all keyed up and worrying.

They can actually be more tired. They tend to work longer and harder in more demanding careers.

Yeah been there with the demented cat 😹. She drove me up the wall at times but I loved her to bits. I could never have coped with actual children!

What a nasty horrible thing to say.

You chose to have them. It's your hard luck that you're regretting your life choices.

I chose not to have them because it looks shit, thanks for reaffirming my choice. Obviously it's not only exhausting but makes you act like a dick. 😂

I'm working over 60 hours this week. I'm childless and knackered

So you agree with the OP that people without children can't be tired?

When I was childless I worked more and my job is extremely demanding. I dont feel I am significantly more tired now. I was knackered then from working until 2/3/4 am frequently with noone to force me to rethink how much I did. I had every right to feel and say that I was justifiably tired

🤣🤣

Agree with you 100% OP

Fuck me this is one of the best I have read on this. I am sorry no one knows what goes on in people's lives. it's also not a competition. stop judging and concentrate on your own life

Actually I lie, the most tired I have ever been was this time last year when I had two under twos in the house and a DH here at end of life. I was beyond exhausted.

Did the a&e with a relative recently. I was so tired I was nearly delirious 🙈

TBH my aunt brought up two kids and works part time whilst having chronic fatigue syndrome so I've decided on her behalf to judge the op for feeling tired when she only has kids and no chronic fatigue syndrome.

Oh go away. You chose to have kids. People are allowed to talk about what makes their lives hard. I am tired this week because I'm anxious, and when I'm anxious I sleep about three hours a night. I know it's not special parent tiredness, but I still feel shit.