Would this be a reasonable amount of food for you in a day?

[boilthekettle]

My mum is dying and I am so stressed out, as a result some days I'm really struggling to eat. I've just decided to eat whatever tempts me for now and not worry about quality and honestly I just seem to basically want stuff like crisps and toast. Being lacking in decent nutrition won't be helping with anything though.

Some days I can't face much at all from tension and nausea but in terms of amounts would the following do you?

Breakfast - 4 good big spoons of greek yogurt, two handfuls of blueberries and a banana

Lunch - slice of toast and piece of cheese

Dinner - 4 linda mccartney chicken nugget things, half a 'for 2' side of garlic chips (supposed to have a container of microwave greens but it smelled gone off so we didnt want to risk it) and two heaped spoons of Haagen Dasz ice cream.

Snacks - a packet of crisps waiting for dinner to cook, and half a pack of Munchies sweets/ chocolate in afternoon with cup of tea.

Bizarrely, my ability to drink plenty of water is also impaired, I normally drink loads but it's making me feel sick. Which I assume is also stress?

Well I don’t normally eat breakfast. So my first meal is usually lunch which will be something like noodles or a sandwich. So your one slice of toast and cheese is a bit less.

Dinner sounds about right I’d maybe have 5 nuggets and some veggies but not much off and I wouldn’t have ice cream or sweeties (not sweet tooth) but my snack would maybe be crackers and cheese after work but before dinner.

So not massively different and I’m definitely in the overweight category. (Although I don’t often have nuggets very often for dinner which is why I’m chunky lol). But surely your priorities are elsewhere right now which is completely understandable!!

Yeah, that’s a reasonable amount of food for a day. It’s unhealthy though. It definitely doesn’t indicate someone who is struggling to eat in my opinion.

Be kind to yourself and eat whatever you can manage right now. It’s an incredibly tough season of your life

sever anxiety effects my ability to eat.

if you are worried about nutrients take a multi vitamin. If you think you are losing too much weight can you manage high cal drinks?

I’m really sorry you’re going through this. Although it’s not the healthiest diet, grief is incredibly hard and stressful and you’re eating something which is the main thing. Your breakfast is good and that’s important to help you start the day.

Like you said, for now just go for what you can eat and maybe have a look at getting a multivitamin to help get some of the nutrients you’re not getting from your diet right now?

Sorry about your mum OP.

Sadly I think this thread will be of no benefit to you, MN seems to be a place where eating disorders are encouraged and competitive under eating is rife. You’ve already had one shitty comment from @DinnerThyme i don’t think you need any more.

Just eat what tempts you for now & take a multivitamin.
You're going through a terrible time so just do whatever you need to get through.

Yeah looks fine. All the best OP

@DinnerThyme Unkind & uncalled for.

FWIW I don’t think you’re eating enough except at breakfast. Toast for lunch and 4 nuggets for tea - I’d be ravenous!

It's certainly not the healthiest of diets but I really think you have more to worry about at the moment. You could swap the munchies for a piece of dark chocolate, you could have a box of 'nibbly' bits in the fridge (sliced apples/other fruit, baby tomatoes, chopped carrots etc) or you could just say 'there are more important things happening in my life at the moment, this is temporary and I'll do what I can/ want.

I’m sorry, how was my answer “shitty” at all!? I’m sorry if I upset OP (she hasn’t said that I did), it wasn’t my intention at all. She asked a question where she was concerned that she wasn’t eating enough, I reassured her that she was eating enough (calorie wise) based on what she outlined.

I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong but if I have then please tell me and I’ll try to make amends.

Just eat the munchies and crisps don’t swap them for anything. Life is too short to have miserable vomit dark chocolate and boring ‘bubbly bits’ when you’re going through a horrific time.

*nibbly

Sorry to hear about your mum.

Thats quite a bit more than I’d eat in a day normally so it’s definitely plenty of food.
It obviously depends on your size/weight though and whether you need to lose weight/are losing too much weight etc.

Your priorities are obviously elsewhere so I wouldn’t worry too much about it, especially as it’s a temporary thing.
If you did want to improve what your eating though - maybe cut up some melon/watermelon to pick at through the day as will help with water intake. Snack on chopped veg, nuts, seeds, herbal teas.

Your response comes across snarky and insensitive. OP ignore people like this, you’re doing your best

It definitely doesn’t indicate someone who is struggling to eat in my opinion.

Was your shitty comment.

Either you mean OP is lying about struggling to eat or you think she’s eating so much you can’t imagine why anyone would consider it a struggle

I’m sorry. I’ve clearly missed something. Has my mumsnet glitched and I’ve posted in the wrong place or something? From what I can see, I’ve answered the exact question that OP asked and not said anything remotely unkind. What am I missing? I didn’t intend to upset anyone. I read what she’s eaten, added up the estimated calories and it came to about 2000, which is what someone should be eating in a day.

And I’m not the only one to point it out

Eating something is better than nothing. I struggle to eat anything substantial when I'm very stressed but if I do fancy anything it's usually junk. Very sorry to hear about your mum x

That’s not at all what I intended. It was meant as “you’re doing fine so don’t worry so much or give this so much headspace”.

I've had phases (stress/ pregnancy) where I've just had to roll with what my body accepted. You're under enough stress without unnecessary guilt about what you put into your body.

This is a phase and you can address it when you feel able to.

Yes it could be healthier but give yourself a break. Try to eat a bit of nice fruit too. Sorry about your mum.

Just try and focus on quality over quantity and don't overthink it whilst you're in trauma mode. I know the only thing I can physically eat when I'm knots of anxiety is chocolate or poached eggs on toast!

I'm sorry about your Mum
I have been in your situation and literally all I could stomach was ready salted crisps and yogurt, so don't force more food down, you could be sick.
Try to sip any drink you can stomach regularly and take a multivitamin