Or will I need to leave my job and possibly career when DD starts school?!

[Oneanddone88]

I'm a head of department in a school 75 mins from home. Been there 12 years and am valued and respected. Partner also works an hour away from home 3 days per week. No local family etc.
When I applied for schools, I had to pick the ones with some form of wrap-around. I'll find out in April which will accept DD.
Wrap-around near me is pretty poor, local school has none at all. However, even the ones that do, it's 8.30 til 5pm latest.
We've got some savings and I could ensure I had about 3 months bills saved up before the summer. Am I totally bonkers to leave my job ? I just don't see how it's even going to be doable.
I've applied for a remote education related job this eve, but I'm so sad that I'll have to leave my current place.
Anyone else had to make a drastic change when their little ones started school? Can I keep her in nursery forever please ? 🤣
Local childminders also pretty non existent too. Can't move location either (step child )

@GordonShakespearedoesChristmas yep...30 plus, mildly depressing 🤣

Think how much money you will save not doing such a huge commute every day.

Much less well paid than teaching though

@PriamFarrl yep, £300 . When I'm looking at jobs I'm able to take a lower salary because I know I'll be able to afford it.

@Redblanky yes this was my thought. I worked out that I would be happy dropping to around £33k a year. Currently earning £45k.

I think this needs to be talked about more. People seem to think its easy to go back to work once your kids are at school.

I found the opposite. Nursery was open 7-7 52 weeks a year, so going back to work was easy. (We didn't have DD in 12hrs a day before I get jumped on!)
As soon as they start school, logistically it's a nightmare with wraparound normally not before 8 or after 6 and having to cover 13wks holidays, inset days, strikes, parents evenings, sports days, plays etc.

I went back to work when DD was a year old but ended up giving up again after her reception year of primary.

@SheilaWilcox yes exactly this ! I feel the same ! Nursery is open 8-6 and DD goes 8-4.30 most days ( currently have one day off a week, but won't be allowed next year...). It's working brilliantly for the moment but school is presenting the biggest headache. Most of my friends have grandparents etc to help out though too.

When I advertised for an after school nanny - I got masses of replies - mostly students and older ladies but there was masses of choice. I wouldn't give up your job until you have another one unless you want to. Especially as DP can do pick up 2 x days per week so you are only looking at 3 days per week

@Blog34 interesting. Yes I think you're probably right , I'm going to have to really think about this. It's such a hard decision.

I agree I actually worked fewer hours when DC were in junior school than at any other point.

I also think both of you being so far from home will be a problem and so will inflexibility once she's in school. So many occasions when you need to be there at very short notice.

That said, I do think it's important for women to keep their earning potential and pensiion going. I'd stick with teaching if you're enjoying it and look to move closer to home rather than cut hours/change career.

Also, if you can afford to cut pay, you'll also be able to afford to retire early. If you're living within your means you won't need to work to 68 with a teacher's pension.

My first thought would be to move closer to your work

In the nicest way, you can’t keep that up with a child in school. It’s going to be a constant problem and you’ll be exhausted. Find a new job.

@Redblanky yes definitely. I'd like to stick with teaching and definitely want to keep working and earning. I love working and enjoy my job mostly. But yes , the inflexibility is what will cause us issues. I also had the thought of see how it goes (and hopefully find a childminder/nanny )and if it's just awful, hand my notice in for a finish after next Christmas. Or it could work well and in which case I'll continue.
@evemillbank I definitely would if I could

@Parentandteacher I know. I think that the commute is actually becoming more and more problematic. Plus it's taking longer than ever before due to roadworks etc . It's very stressful

No it’s not!

You'd be absolutely mental to give up a career because of after school care. You need it three days a week? Child under, au pair, nanny, local SAHM. Lots of options. This is a short term issue that requires you to throw money at it. Not make a permanent change to your career!

@alanabennett thank you. This is definitely one thought (of many ) currently swirling around my head.

I'm sorry you went through that, @ColinRobinsonsfamiliar and I completely agree with you.

OP you've got 30 years of work ahead of you, the next 7 years or so is such a small part of it. I think you'd regret jacking it all in.

That should be childminder, of course 😊

I know a school Mum that started using a Nanny from a European country via an agency at the start of last term. Nanny has to leave the UK soon due to Brexit restrictions, so she’s now looking for another one.

Possibly an Au pair? They could just do the school runs. Plus, a few other bits around the house to make your lives easier once you arrive home.

I would look into Childminder options once you know what school your DD has got into. Go to the school and ask the office staff and school parents about Childminders/Au pairs as soon as DD is allocated a school place.

Most wrap around care hours start at 7.30am and end at 6pm in London schools.

I also concur that independent schools cover wrap around care hours with the addition of extra curriculum/activity clubs as part of the standard school day. Although, independent primary school fees are only likely to be cheaper than nursery fees outside of London.

Can your DP not do some or all school runs on the days that he will be WFH?

Also look for a similar job closer to home.

🤯 schools who have the blanket rules of their staff not being part time/able to split groups etc blow my brain. So glad my heads view on it is he wants us to put our own families first as we will be happier and give more to the job.

I hope you work something else I’d be pushing to stay part time though. They’re only little once

@NaturalBae thank you. Dp will do all wraparound twice a week when he is at home. So it's 3 days I need help with when actually, written down, doesn't look as daunting. I think my plan will be to apply for local education jobs (when they come up) and look again at childminders or a nanny

Yep I had some problems with this. I battled it out with nurseries but then when she started school it was lots worse. Breakfast club was supposed to start at 8:15 but the woman wouldn’t open up until 8:25 then I was in a mad panic getting to school. Gave up in the end. Couldn’t stand dd having such long days and the actual wrap round care was abysmal. Lots of safeguarding issues. I felt guilty leaving her there. I have a lower paid wfh job now. It works on a lot of levels but I do feel a bit like I’ve abandoned my career. Very difficult situation op.

@MumDadBingoBlueyy thanks, it's mad isn't it. It's one of the things that really does annoy me about my current place.
They let me have one day off a week this year as a favour (and I've not had to drop much salary ), but I've not been allowed to tell anyone else I work with as they're worried others will want want to do it. It's strictly for this year and we've had to be inventive with my teaching groups to make it work 🫣