To think DC will be safer at nursery than with a nanny?

[VegMam]

We're currently debating whether to send our 12 month old DC to nursery, or to hire a nanny. I can see some benefits of a nanny over nursery, however, I worry that DC will be less safe with a nanny. For example if the nanny takes DC to the park, what if the nanny doesn't watch DC closely and DC runs off, same with crossing the road etc. Or what if the nanny is distracted and DC picks up choking hazards. I think this worry is exacerbated by MIL telling me she can always tell which ones are parents and which are nannies at the park as the nannies are the ones playing on their phones / chatting rather than interacting with / watching the kids.

In some ways nursery feels like a more controlled and therefore safer environment.

YABU - the nanny is a professional and will take good care of the child.
YANBU - a nanny is an unknown quantity looking after DC in 'the wild' where anything can happen

Not much happening under your bridge tonight, then?

I feel more comfortable with nursery over childminder (we didn't consider a nanny) for reasons several have already stated, mine will start at 12 weeks so we'll see how it goes.

If you use a qualified nanny with excellent previous references from parent you can speak to I would use a nanny over a nursery. They get individual care and attention taken out to lots of different places and have the comfort of their home environment too I think for a 12 month old that is far nicer than a nursery setting.

The child will be so much safer and better looked after with a trusted nanny or childminder.
Nurseries cannot get staff, they are desperate so generally will hire and old person who has completed an online level 2 qualification weather they want to work with kids or not. Staff turnover is high, child never gets to develop a bond with their key workers yada yada.
Workers not really aware and tested on the EYFS like a childminder/ nanny working for ofsted is… There are exceptions obviously but most nurseries are practically at crisis point, sending kids home any hint of illness to keep to legal ratios.

This is such a common view, i always find it interesting as i actively wanted my child out and about doing normal things including school runs
Me too personally I think it's much better for them than being in a nursery all day.

Your MIL is wrong
I was a nanny before i had my children and i can hand on heart say i was a great nanny, I was never on my phone at the park i was always attentive and playing with the children in my care. Now as a mum of 3 if we go to the park (which is rare as i hate it) I can be found sat on a bench looking at my phone or reading a book whilst they amuse themselves.

So what did you do, never go out? Lots of babies hate being put down if they are used to being held so pushchair, car seat, playmat or floor are all a no but they still need fresh air. Did the nursery have staff carrying them around a yard all day?
People object to school runs because they think the child gets nothing from it and is just being dragged out when actually they are learning .....colours, numbers, birds, shapes, road safety games, the school environment it can be a very positive experience

All studies show a baby is best with a secure consistent carer hence the key worker was put forward to try to fill the gap between a small setting and a big one. Unfortunately many nurseries do not use a key worker in the way it is intended. They should be the main person working with a child ...play, nappy, feeding, greeting and handing to parent but in most nurseries this is not how they are used and it's just paperwork. This makes it harder to settle and a less secure child. Unfortunately too some parents don't want their child to bond with others (understandably it's tough handing baby to someone else).

Just pick the right nanny. I never doubted the choice at all and I felt very confident that she would look after my child well. They still really miss her and talk about her. When I was working overseas a lot, they would get a bit mixed up and call her mummy. You'll never get that with a nursery.

I feel there is safety in numbers which is why I chose nursery over nanny

This is basically what I wanted to say!

We couldn’t afford a nanny when mine were little but I would would have preferred it. Id have preferred really good nanny to a nursery that is!

A good nursery is a great option too though. Just be really careful with the one you choose - in the same way you’re careful with recruiting a nanny - or anyone to do an important job. Don’t be worried about moving your child if they don’t seem happy or if you have concerns though. I moved my Dd when she was nearly 3 to a nursery that was much more of a pain to get to as I was worried the first nursery didn’t give them enough outdoor time or interesting activities- and it was the best decision. She loved the second nursery having never really settled at the first.

I had the same worries so put my first child in a nursery (aka daycare which is what they really are). However, sometimes I'd turn up and there was some random person I'd never met handing my child over to me. There were too many staff members coming and going and it didn't sit right with me.

The nappy rashes were horrendous. Switching to a childminder was the best thing. Your child will actually experience real life with a Nanny more akin to the life they have with you.

It depends. You get good and bad versions of each

I personally would send to nursery. More sociable ,and more flexible if one person off sick and even subconsciously every worker is auditing the other workers so child is safer .

Expert knowledge here? Horrific advice.

Yes it will wait until school starts instead. This is not preventable 🤣

I’m a nanny and I’m very safety conscious. I’ve had over 25 years experience keeping babies and toddlers safe.

we’re human of course and accidents happens as they do with parents.

No of course not. Nursery had a garden - they would run around, play, use the trikes etc. It’s being strapped in a pram a lot of children don’t like, not being outside generally.

At home of course we’d go out if it was for a purpose - going somewhere either we or they needed or wanted to go. We didn’t just fester at home if there was somewhere we wanted to get to. What I’m saying is that if you know your child will scream until they are hoarse in the pram why would you pick that childcare option if anywhere where the child doesn’t scream for an hour is also an option?

I agree school run can be stimulating if you can actually let the child out at some point. So with my second I’d usually go super early and go via the duck pond, let them out and toddle around the grass, maybe see how far they could walk even though it makes a 10 minute walk into 45 minutes … You do what every parent does and try to make a boring errand into something the child gets something from.

Can you ask that from a childminder though? Presumably not. Especially if they have a double buggy and multiple mindees. I was aware that you just have to let the childminder get on with their day and errands in their own way.. so it seemed Option 1) - lots of pram and crying time and Option 2) - no pram time but still plenty of outside time, fresh air etc.

Not all nannies are Ofsted registered and those that are? It's vanishingly rare to be inspected. Most decent nannies will have knowledge of the EYFS but noone is "tested" on it. Bizarre.

Nursery workers carry out observations and track a child's progress in a much more formal way so if a new recruit doesn't know the EYFS they will know it inside out and backwards very quickly!

Exactly! But regardless of choice, it's a very narrow minded view.

@CremeEggsForBreakfast Nannies are not required to be on the ofsted register. The only reason nannies register is if parents want them to do they can claim the vouchers. I’ve never been registered as it doesn’t benefit me and the ppl I work for don’t qualify for the help.

Nannies who are registered have nothing to do with ofsted bar they may have an inspection and need to show certificates and the location of the first aid kit.

we don’t follow eyfs or do learning journeys etc et are independent

Honestly we couldn't afford a nanny but I went with nursery over a childminder for similar reasons- more people to care for her

Please could you explain why? Genuinely interested

Interview nannies and visit nurseries, and see what you like better.
if nanny is ill/ on holiday you will be unable to work. For a nanny you will be paying salary, pension contributions, they may go on mar leave etc. but you don’t have the stress of morning drop offs.
if child is I’ll they won’t be unable to go to nursery. They will be ill a lot. But they also make friends and you will meet other parents.

I agree with this, I’d even say nurseries aren’t really suitable until a child is 3. There are too many staff in a nursery, you don’t get to decide who cares for your child. This is a concern to me until the child can communicate they’re happy/not happy.

I think young babies/toddlers need attachment and a bond to their caregivers, I don’t think they get this in a nursery as much as they do with a nanny/childminder. Once they get to 3 they can thrive in a more teacher - student relationship.