To think of you’re signed off sick you should stay at home?

[Poppins17]

I’ve been unwell since the beginning of December.

I’m currently on my second dose of antibiotics and have now got steroids.

Dr informed me to rest as much as possible but there was no discussion about time off work.

I work in a senior position in Local Government, and have 15 staff to manage as well as assets.

I met a friend last night (which was a mistake as when I got home I realised I didn’t have the energy to do that), and she said how unwell I looked, and how I needed to go back to the drs to get signed off work.

She mentioned doing a few things whilst off sick to help with my well-being (spa days, going to the coast etc).

It made me wonder something that I assume when people are off sick they stay at home and don’t engage in any ‘nice’ activities.. is this an old fashioned view now?

Just to stay I work in the same village as where I live so likely people would see me out and about.

YABU - You should engage in nice activities for your own well being

YANBU - You should stay at home

I don't think it's as simple as you're making out and it seems a bit narrow-minded/literal to think this way.

There are lots of different jobs and lots of different things to be off sick with.
Ive never been in this situation, luckily, but my mother in law has. After a stroke, she was signed off from work as a carer, but as she rehabilitated she was able, and encouraged, to do things like go for walks, see friends. We met her for walks/lunches out several times before going back to work. Are you seriously suggesting that a half hour walk and a cafe lunch is the same as doing a 12 hour shift in a care home, for someone rehabilitating from a stroke?

Or that someone undergoing chemo is automatically fit to work 5 days a week as a primary school teacher because they've managed to walk along a promenade for a bit?

Read the thread. No you aren't.

There are many conditions where it is beneficial to get out, socialise a bit and get some fresh air when a full day at work would be too much.

Quite frankly, in the scenario we are talking about and the illness we are talking about, if you worked for me you could knock yourself out, got out and have spa days, day trips to the coast and pub, evenings out - do what you want and justify it for as long as you like.

But I would view it very poorly. And it would affect your future with me as your employer.

It is really that simple so it's kind of your choice I guess.

I have a lot of people report to me and have worked for 36 years with very little time off sick to date, it's not the sort of behaviour I would expect or accept from my employees nor the sort of behaviour I would dream about conducting myself.

Thanks for all the interaction on this thread.

Just to reiterate, I’m not actually off sick - I’ve been struggling on as I don’t want to burden others in the team with my work.

My question came about following a conversation with a friend who said I should seek to be signed off as hadn’t been well for some time, and being on antibiotics and steroids didn’t appear right now to be working, however, her views in terms of what being off sick and resting looked like we’re different to mine. I would say being at home and not going to spas or the beach would be the right thing to do, whereas she thought they aided well-being and there was nothing wrong with building those into ‘rest’ time whilst off sick.

*were

Then you are a poor employer who lacks understanding. I would not care to work for someone with such ignorance.

And also exceptionally lucky not to have suffered from any illness or injury that required being signed off etc

Perhaps actually such a charmed life that it's not real?

With nasty respiratory infection like you have I'd stay home. Tbh when I'm off sick I feel guilty even going to the shop for supplies! But I recognise that won't work for everyone and it does depend what you're off sick with.
I wouldn't feel up to a spa day or trip to the coast if full of cold so bad I'm off work.
I agree if off with stress or something it's a bit different. And it really depends what it is that's wrong

That's fine by me as I don't have any spaces anyway.

I have the highest employee satisfaction rating in my group of accounts in my company, I am not going to say too much more as it could be outing but my team rate the highest out of approximately 3,000 employees. I have team members who have stayed with me over 14 years and have a very low attrition rate. The results speak for themselves in that respect so don't have any problems keeping staff motivated and enjoying what they do! I am very fair should the need arise for sickness and could give a load of examples but again could be too outing.

What I am not going to entertain you having a jolly while the rest of us are working.

When I lived at home, if I was sick from work Mum would tell me if I was too sick to work. To be honest I probably have a different outlook to most folk, if I am sick I am genuinely sick and wouldn't be going to the gym or on days out.

I'm also a temp so don't get paid for being off sick so my days of being ill are extremely minimal.

Sorry I meant to say, when I lived at home if I was sick to work Mum would tell me if I was too sick to ride the horse. I would have to go and muck out and feed him regardless because that's what you do when you have an animal and was always worried about being spotted by colleagues in case they thought I was taking the mickey and going somewhere when I should be at home in bed.

I’ve been signed off once for a period of nearly 4 months after slipping discs in my back. Towards the end before my phased return to work (classroom of 8 year olds) I had a few spa afternoons with a friend of mine who picked me up and drove me and helped me get dressed 😂
the hot beds felt amazing on my back and the saunas felt really therapeutic.
it’s a spa attached to a gym where both my friend and I were members so had used it loads before (and since), I’m not sure I would have thought to actually go out of my way to book a spa day anywhere but I really appreciated it being there when I was going through my physio and recuperating.
Once I was more confident and mobile I was then going out for walks, short ones at first.
If anyone saw me out and about and judged me for it, I never heard about it.
I tend to mind my own business based on the fact that you very rarely know why someone has been signed off unless you’re their nearest and dearest.

I still have this view. You’re sick so you stay home. I think if I knew someone was too sick to work I’d be very sceptical if they were having spa days. imagine this comment will go down like a lead balloon but it’s just ingrained in me!

@Hydrangeatea I'm interested to know - in your 36 years of managing people, whether you've ever managed anyone who has suffered a stroke, had time off with a bereavement, a heart attack, recovered from surgery, or undergone chemo? I don't need details obviously, but as I said in my previous post - surely with your extensive experience you can imagine a scenario where someone in one of those situations may be able to go for a walk or a swim or lunch, but not be able to work as a carer/teacher/work on a building site, for example.

I had someone last year whose husband had a life changing medical event, so whilst she wasn't ill herself I pushed through 6 months full time pay for her to be off to support him through this. On return to work we have supported her to have full time pay but LOTS of flexibility for ongoing hospital appointments, days off sick if her son is sick etc.

As I said in previous threads, I am fair and I keep my employees long term because of that fairness and understanding if and when needed.

Were not talking about that on this thread though are we, I have said in my previous posts "in this scenario" I wouldn't be happy with people taking days out to the beach or the spa.

Short term illness of this nature should mean at home resting not gallivanting about.

What I am not going to do is spend the next 10 pages justifying my opinion or my management style whilst people try to trip me up.

If you feel you want to take a day out to the beach or a spa day whilst you are off sick and if you feel that is justified then that's your decision in life I guess.

I wouldn't do it, I wouldn't employ someone who had that attitude to their work or their employer. I have a "friend" who doesn't seem to do very well and constantly bemoans why she can't move forward in her career, I don't know the ins and outs of why, how could I know, but I am aware of the amount of sick she has had over the years and the reasons for it - 8 weeks for a sprained ankle because she couldn't walk from the car park to the building nor could she walk around the building but she managed to get to the shops and walk around the supermarket, go to the pub, go out with friends, 3 weeks off for a close family bereavement, a further two weeks off when one of her animals died. If she has a couple of days off for a cold then she thinks she might as well round it up to a week - you get the picture.

I have done well in my career, there are many reasons for that, but attitude to my work and my employer is definitely one of them.

I do hope that all those on this thread who have made sweeping statements such as the above are not managers. If they are, I think they’re in the wrong job.

The times I don't work are when I literally can't get out of bed! I was ill last year for about 3 months, on and off, and the last thing I could think of doing on my "days off" from work were go for a spa day!! 🤣🤣

It depends.
Off work stating you have flu and not able to lift your head off the pillow = best to not to be seen outside!
Off work with back pain, stress etc: fine.

Wow. That’s some achievement, I couldn’t move for 4 weeks after mine, had to take 12 weeks off work.

Is not reduced hours to help your recovery an option? Someone who had been off sick for a while might come back in a phased way.

As for what you do when off sick, going to get food shopping in is very different from a night out.

A spa day would be very useful for my mental health. If i was stuck with diarrhoea i wouldn't go to a spa day.

It sounds like you have a very limited understanding of illness... if you've got something acute and short like the flu, then yes, you probably won't feel well enough to go out to lunch. But if you have something more chronic and long-term then you might have days when you feel up to doing something non-strenuous for an hour or two (when you can go back home and sleep whenever you want) but still not be ready for a full 8-hour work day where you have to be switched on and active constantly. I don't understand how that is so hard to understand, especially when there are dozens of people with first-hand experience on this very thread who have explained it in a lot of detail who you've obviously chosen to ignore, even though it's pretty self-explanatory.

And still no explanation of why laying around all day in warm relaxing surroundings with a pool and sauna and massages (all things that have been used for convalescence for millennia) is such a sin when you're ill 😂

I think if you’re off due to stress or other mental health problems then yes, it’s a good idea to do stuff that’s relaxing and that you enjoy , be it a spa day or the beach.

I don’t think a spa day or going to the beach though will help with sinusitis or the flu or other physical illness and am rather agog that your friend seems to think this is the cure. How very odd.

Well, I’m glad I’m not one of the imaginary 15 people that you claim to manage.

I’m currently recovering from emergency surgery to remove bilateral pulmonary embolisms. If I don’t move around it would seriously jeopardise my recovery. I have a whole 12-week exercise schedule here from the hospital. Week 1 is 5 minutes of walking a few times a day and it builds up over time. And yes, my husband has driven me to the woods and the beach for my walking and for a change of scenery. It’s also good for my mental health. Being rushed to hospital and into surgery as fast as I was and being made aware how close to death you were is a huge mental trauma. When I arrived at the hospital my husband was told I would not survive the night without surgery to remove the clots.

You’re not a doctor and you have no right to dictate how people should recuperate. If you want to stay in bed, that’s your choice. But understand that medical advice has changed somewhat since the Victorian times.

Perhaps people management is not for you.