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AIBU?

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Original poster

Friend re-selling gift ?

117 replies

HunkieDorie · 07/01/2023 18:15

Tell me if I am! Or maybe oversensitive?

I bought my friend's daughter a present for her birthday about 3 months ago and she is now selling it on Facebook to make money? I would rather have it back if she didn't like it so I could have it for my daughter. I am not angry just slightly a bit upset that she has thought so little of my gift?

OP posts:
JustDrama · 07/01/2023 18:35

Personally I'd like the post and say nothing else. That way she knows you know Wink

FawnFrenchieMum · 07/01/2023 18:36

Shes had it 3 months so not like she sold it the next day. Probably just got loads more stuff for Christmas.
Is she selling just that or put a few things on in one go?

amonsteronthehill · 07/01/2023 18:36

Buy it for £3 for your daughter then!

Wakk · 07/01/2023 18:36

Buy it

ratatattatt · 07/01/2023 18:39

JustDrama · 07/01/2023 18:35

Personally I'd like the post and say nothing else. That way she knows you know Wink

So passive aggressive!

PointeShoesandTutus · 07/01/2023 18:39

I couldn’t get upset by this. Unless she specifically said it was something she wanted for her DD, it might just not suit/not be played with/take up too much room. My DDs got so much stuff for Christmas, it’s lovely but we just don’t need it all. We got 4 or 5 barbies, and already have a few, my baby got 6 different shape sorters. We don’t have a massive house and I’m massively anti clutter so inevitably I’ll get rid of some of them. Better sold on to someone who uses it than gathering dust.

Judgyjudgy · 07/01/2023 18:39

rollerblind · 07/01/2023 18:17

Perhaps she got two of the same, so keeping one and selling one?

Could be this. I think if it really bothers you, you could just ask, maybe she needs the money. Otherwise, perhaos hust dont give her anything again. I don't think it's bad she's selling it if it is a double up, but I think it's a bit rude and tacky she's doing it where you can see it

Mamaneedsadrink · 07/01/2023 18:40

Wakk · 07/01/2023 18:36

Buy it

Ha, do this

pairofrollerskates · 07/01/2023 18:40

I would be very insulted if someone gave me a gift back. My mother has done this to me on many occasions. She could have quietly passed the gift on to one of my sisters but chose instead to tell me she didn't want it. I was quite hurt each time (have given up even trying now, I just buy her any old crap since she never seems to like anything I choose anyway)

Cococomellon · 07/01/2023 18:41

I agree OP that maybe she got two of the same or maybe she didn't like it. Either way it is hers to do as she wishes and you can't really expect it back for your own daughter once you have gifted it. She could have listed it on Facebook without her Facebook friends seeing it though!

Original poster
HunkieDorie · 07/01/2023 18:41

@FawnFrenchieMum she is just selling at

OP posts:
Original poster
HunkieDorie · 07/01/2023 18:42

@pairofrollerskates tempted to not bother now- just money in the account or a smiths gift card for £5 at least I know she will use it

OP posts:
Delorestormborn · 07/01/2023 18:43

That’s incredibly tactless.

phoenixrosehere · 07/01/2023 18:46

I wouldn’t be fussed. If their kids didn’t like it, they didn’t like it. It may be a theme of something they liked, but not be suitable for some reason.

If it is bothering you that much, and you are close friends, just ask.

LoveAHolidayOrTwo · 07/01/2023 18:46

Offer her a pound for it?

BigHeadBertha · 07/01/2023 18:48

To me, it's basic etiquette that once you give someone a gift, it's theirs, end of. They can keep it, sell it, donate it, regift it or pull it apart and set it on fire.

What WOULD definitely be rude imo are things like handing an unwanted gift back to the giver or letting the recipient know in any way that you saw it for sale.

Personally, I have to say that I do not especially want many of the gifts I receive. However, I do greatly appreciate that a friend or family member thought of me and got me something they thought I'd enjoy. I would never repay their kindness by hurting their feelings or attempting to "teach them a lesson."

Original poster
HunkieDorie · 07/01/2023 18:49

@phoenixrosehere we are very close friends which I guess why it's hurt me a bit. I don't want to ask as I don't want to make it awkward between us, I know that's silly!

OP posts:
BigHeadBertha · 07/01/2023 18:51

...Or, when I'm the giver, following up in any way on what they did with the gift I gave them.

anyolddinosaur · 07/01/2023 18:54

buy it back.

Labradooor · 07/01/2023 18:55

Life is too short to worry about it. Kid probably has too much stuff. Someone else will benefit from it. Would you rather it was never played with and sent to landfill.

thecatsthecats · 07/01/2023 18:57

I've had some awful gifts which were in theory something I'd like or ask for.

Only wanting to give someone a gift because they'll treasure it, or else you want it back is a very self-centred way of thinking. You wanted her to enjoy it, she didn't, so the choice is now hers. And it's isn't "worth a bit more" than £3 to her. It's a thing that she doesn't like, and hopes to recoup some of the value of.

PinkSyCo · 07/01/2023 18:59

Kids can get bored of things very quickly and maybe your friend has just decided to have a new year declutter. Why don’t you buy it if you think your DD would like it. That way you may get an explanation from your friend, your DD will be happy and you won’t feel so out of pocket.

N27 · 07/01/2023 19:01

maybe message and politely say if she doesn’t want it you’d be happy to pay £3 for it for your daughter

StridTheKiller · 07/01/2023 19:04

Buy it back for £3 and give it to your DD.

TheHauntedPencilCase · 07/01/2023 19:09

I regularly regift things my kids are given. People are really generous and we end up with too much stuff or things they won't play with and I can be a bit ruthless because otherwise its overwhelming.