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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder when DD will ever be dry at night

95 replies

Ilovechocolate87 · 05/01/2023 21:07

DD is 5, 6 in March.She was fully toilet trained in the day by rising 3 (after many false starts and challenges along the way) but is still in pull ups at night.
I spoke to the H/V about a year or so ago, who said it isn't something that can be control, is down to hormones etc, and she will grow out of it in time.
But I'm wondering when that will ever happen....her pullup is soaking full nearly every single morning, and also she is often weeing in it as soon as it goes on at night.She says she 'forgets' but whilst I never tell her off for wetting during the night as I know she doesn't realise, I do get frustrated with her sometimes for this because she is fully awake playing and I'm not sure if it's just laziness because she can't be bothered to go to the toilet, and knows the pull up will catch the wee or else I'm wondering if the sensation of the pull up going on somehow tells her brain to wet herself and it is genuinely an accident?
Money is tight as it is for many at the moment, and spending £20ish a month just on huggies pyjama pants is really something we could do without....
Does anyone know of any cheaper alternatives? The reusable ones just seem extortionate for only one!
Or do I bite the bullet and just leave her with nothing on incase the comfort and security of the pull-up is the problem and maybe it might 'train' her body.I tried a couple of times a couple of years ago but felt awful as she was waking up lying in urine, then it took forever stripping the bed, bathing her etc and I'm wondering how I would manage that on school/work mornings (also have 1yo to get sorted)
I definitely don't want to withold drink if she is thirsty, but she often has the bulk of her drink late afternoon/early evening so unsure if that isn't helping.
What do people recommend? I don't know what the answer is...

OP posts:

Glitterandcard · 05/01/2023 21:21

Why is the pull up on when she’s not asleep/while she’s playing? Mine weren’t dry at night until 6 or 7, but they did a last wee in the loo just before going to sleep and only then did they put on the pull-up.

She doesn’t sound ready to be dry if she’s waking up soaked, and 5 is really not that late for night time continence, but I’d also be pushing drinks (by which I mean water not juice etc) earlier in the day so she’s not mega thirsty in the evening.

Hercisback · 05/01/2023 21:23

Why is she in one when playing? It needs to go on just before bed and come off as soon as she wakes.

You could put her to bed without one and then put it on when you go up (or when she's asleep).

Lampshadered · 05/01/2023 21:24

I have no advice on night training but Huggies are extortionate. I use Tesco own brand pull ups.

Echobelly · 05/01/2023 21:25

DS was only dry at night age 6, though was OK (mostly) in the day by 4 - I remember speaking to mums of his friends and loads of them were still in pull ups at night at 5-6, so it's not uncommon. Like your DD, DS was totally soaked at night (slept like a rock) until suddenly he wasn't, so we could stop with the pull ups.

Bemyclementine · 05/01/2023 21:25

Yes, agree - put it on after her last wee as she gets into bed.

modgepodge · 05/01/2023 21:27

£20 a month 😲 we use Tesco pull ups, which are about £4 for 30 ish!

Koalaslippers · 05/01/2023 21:27

My DD went from filling a pull up at night to completely dry a month before her 6th birthday. It really was like flicking a switch. Until then I used Tesco pull ups which are cheaper than Huggies.

OneToThree · 05/01/2023 21:29

Dd wasn’t dry at night until 10. I’m afraid you just have to wait until they’re ready. My other 2 dc were dry day and night at 3 and I did nothing different.

FlickFlackTrap · 05/01/2023 21:31

Aldi now do night time pants. Can’t recall how much they are but we find them better than Huggies.
My 8 year old is still wet at night. Encourage as much drinking as possible during the day to expand the bladder. The Eric website has useful information. But otherwise you just need to wait it out for when they are ready. We saw the GP at 7 years old and have been referred for advice.

LumpySpaceCow · 05/01/2023 21:32

DS is nearly 7 and is just about getting there but still sometimes has the odd accident. I insist that he goes to the toilet just before bed as on the nights when he would say he didn't need a wee, he would inevitably wet the bed! I wouldn't take the pull up away if she needs it, it is a bloody nightmare changing wet sheets constantly and I think this is developmental, not something you can train out of her.
Pull up wise, we would just use aldi nappy pants - cheap as chips and did the job.

Bywayofanupdate · 05/01/2023 21:33

My Dd was 7, my youngest is still in pull ups at 5

MonkeyPuddle · 05/01/2023 21:35

DS got dry at 5. He was lazy. And used to weeing into pull ups. I also had to use the Huggies ones cos he didn’t fit the own brand ones, he needed the ones for ages 8+ as he’s tall as owt.
Anyway, a friend works as a HV a nursery nurse and she told me to do this before bed - wee, teeth, wee, switch his willy off, into pj’s and then straight to bed. He switched his willy off by poking his belly and making beep boop noises.
Hes been dry ever since bar 2 accidents.

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 05/01/2023 21:35

Is she drinking plenty? My daughter wasnt dry at night and I spoke to the HV and it turned out she wasnt drinking enough in the day so her bladder just wasn't strong enough to hold all the wee at night.

We had to drink 6 glasses of water or juice a day with 4 in the morning and 2 in the afternoon and nothing for 2 hours before bed. And avoid fruit juice for the last drink. Within 2 weeks she was dry

Deadringer · 05/01/2023 21:36

My youngest wasn't dry until she was 9. The doctor told us to bring her to the loo when we were going to bed, and again during the night. If that didnt work, the next step was an alarm, then possibly medication. I couldn't see the point of it at all to be honest, but we did it, and within a couple of weeks she was dry every morning. After another couple of weeks we stopped needing to wake her during the night, another few weeks after that we stopped waking her at all and she never wet the bed again. I thought the idea was to train her to wake up herself and go to the loo, but she stopped needing to go, no idea why that worked but it did.

morekidsthanhands · 05/01/2023 21:36

With all of mine I stopped the pull ups before they were dry at night. I put a waterproof sheet on the bed, stopped drinks after 6pm, took them to the toilet a few times before bed and also carried them to the toilet before I went to bed at 11pm ish for a wee. Often they stayed asleep for the late night wee.

Yes we had a couple of accidents (some took longer than others) but they where all dry at night in no time. We just phased out the late night wee eventually. I have seen this not being recommended but it worked for us.

You could also ask your gp for a referral to an enuresis clinic.

Quordle · 05/01/2023 21:38

Presumably you've done sticker charts and the like? My child was the same and I was sure it was the hormone thing, but I promised to buy them a toy after 10 dry nights or whatever and what had been a problem for several years was miraculously solved. Actually couldn't believe it!

Hbradley · 05/01/2023 21:38

I remember my son when about 5 he was always wet in morning but just stopped putting pull ups on and he instantly became dry. May have been just a coincidence but I wonder whether I should have took it off sooner.

AliceMcK · 05/01/2023 21:39

Every child is different, my youngest is 5+6m and still in nappies at night. I don't use pullups as her skin reacts to them. My oldest was closer to 6 & even then had a few accidents one off for a couple of years after.

Nappy is put on when going to bed and she's been to the toilet. Sometimes she will wake up and go to the toilet, she will get there in the end.

Ilovethewild · 05/01/2023 21:39

As a parent with an 11yr old only now mostly dry at night, incontinence service advises-
1.5 ltrs drink before 1pm, last drink 2-3 hrs b4 bed, drink clear liquids, stop blackcurrant if you use that it’s worst for continence. Try an develop a full bladder as it’s a muscle you can stretch to hold more.

double up bedding with waterproof sheet in between to make changing bed easier,
you can get an alarm but 6 is young, 7/8 is more usual.

hormones will come, you can rush it.

KangarooKenny · 05/01/2023 21:41

Wee and brush teeth, then the pull-up goes on just before getting into bed.

Jedsnewstar · 05/01/2023 21:42

I think the ability to not pee when asleep is due to a hormone which kicks in when it kicks in. My DS has just kicked it. Suddenly the pull ups were dry. Then the next night and so on.

PS Aldi do a night pants

Sausagedognamedmash · 05/01/2023 21:43

Aldi or Tesco own brand pull ups are great and so much cheaper!

My DD finally became dry at night just before her 7th birthday. Before that, despite being dry in the day from 2.5, no drinks after 5pm etc etc no matter what we did she was wet at least 5 nights out of 7.

I have no idea why it finally clicked but we stuck to limited liquids after tea time and toilet straight before bed and woke her for a wee when I went to bed around 10:30/11pm for a week or so and that seemed to do it. She was then fine until 7amish.

tallbirduk · 05/01/2023 21:43

My DS was 8. Tried going without pull-ups and he’d be soaked by 11pm and wouldn’t wake up - he’d have slept in the wet bed all night.

Promised him a treat if he had 5 nights without a wet bed, one morning he woke up and declared success because his bed was dry BUT his trousers were wet!!!

Bought an alarm, told him about it, he hated the idea, he was dry from then on! Best thing I ever bought and I never even opened the box 😂

I was convinced it was physical and not mental before that, afterwards…well, what would you think?

Deadringer · 05/01/2023 21:43

Every child is different, but all of mine wore pullups in bed until they became dry spontaneously, at 3.5, 4, 3, and 4 respectively, until my youngest, who was 9 as I said in my pp.

romdowa · 05/01/2023 21:44

Night time dryness is regulated by a hormone. You can't train it, the hormone just has to start being released in the body , usually by the time they are 7.

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