To wonder when DD will ever be dry at night

[Ilovechocolate87]

DD is 5, 6 in March.She was fully toilet trained in the day by rising 3 (after many false starts and challenges along the way) but is still in pull ups at night.
I spoke to the H/V about a year or so ago, who said it isn't something that can be control, is down to hormones etc, and she will grow out of it in time.
But I'm wondering when that will ever happen....her pullup is soaking full nearly every single morning, and also she is often weeing in it as soon as it goes on at night.She says she 'forgets' but whilst I never tell her off for wetting during the night as I know she doesn't realise, I do get frustrated with her sometimes for this because she is fully awake playing and I'm not sure if it's just laziness because she can't be bothered to go to the toilet, and knows the pull up will catch the wee or else I'm wondering if the sensation of the pull up going on somehow tells her brain to wet herself and it is genuinely an accident?
Money is tight as it is for many at the moment, and spending £20ish a month just on huggies pyjama pants is really something we could do without....
Does anyone know of any cheaper alternatives? The reusable ones just seem extortionate for only one!
Or do I bite the bullet and just leave her with nothing on incase the comfort and security of the pull-up is the problem and maybe it might 'train' her body.I tried a couple of times a couple of years ago but felt awful as she was waking up lying in urine, then it took forever stripping the bed, bathing her etc and I'm wondering how I would manage that on school/work mornings (also have 1yo to get sorted)
I definitely don't want to withold drink if she is thirsty, but she often has the bulk of her drink late afternoon/early evening so unsure if that isn't helping.
What do people recommend? I don't know what the answer is...

One of DC was wonderfully reliably dry in day time from 2yrs2 months old, but not at night until > 7 yrs old! It wasn't for lack of trying.

This is exactly what happened to DD age 8. Such a simple, logical solution.

MonkeyPuddle · Today 21:35
DS got dry at 5. He was lazy.

Please don’t label children lazy for not being dry at night, especially at 5 which is still very young. Many children don’t start to make the hormone required to remain dry at night until they are around 7.

I have twin girls. Both were dry in the day at 2.8. One was dry at night by 3.5 but her sister wore a pull up until 6. It really wasn’t a big deal as children are all so different.

Buy supermarket own brand and like others say only put it on as she gets into bed after her last toilet wee and straight off when she wakes. She won’t be 21 in pull ups.

Don't put the pull up on until she is actually going to bed.

HV is quite right about the hormone which she needs to walk her up from sleep. But if she's putting the pull up on before her and peeing in when awake that then that is her being lazy.

She will get there. My first was 6. I'm a beaver leader and we usually have at least a couple of 6 year olds wearing pull-ups at sleepovers. It's quite common.

So make sure she drinks plenty in the day time.

No fluids in the 90 minute before bed.

Make sure she does a wee just before getting into bed. Dont out her pull up on until she is in bed.

Approx 2 hours after she is asleep take her for a wee.

Keep doing this. Every night.

Until shes waking up with a dry pull up she isnt ready to come out of the pull ups.

She is still quite young.

If it persists over 6.5 years old see your GP.

Avoid juices and fizzy drinks.

Just clear fluids or milk.

Especially avoid blackcurrant juices.

I have a 3 yo awaiting assessment for ASD. She's still mostly non verbal which makes it difficult. Didn't manage to train during the day til nearly 3.5, literally just before starting nursery in Sept. I decided to be relaxed about night training and was using Huggies Pullups but she doesn't often go straight to sleep when placed in bed and noticed she was also urinating in them before even asleep. One night she fell asleep before I managed to put them on and was dry. I thought it was an absolute fluke but by the end of that week she was refusing to put them on and wanted normal pants on instead! So I don't know if it was in her little head that she didn't have to worry as she had pull ups on.

BTW, for when not wearing pull ups. Reusable inco pad sheet things on amazon that go on top of sheet and fold in at sides are amazing. It cost £15 for 2 which seems expensive but they're washable. They're like square Huggies Bedmats essentially. But not £7 for a pack of 7 🙄

I’m calling my own child lazy.
Not anyone else’s. I will describe my own child’s behaviour as I see it.
He’s had D&V over Christmas with frequent faecal incontinence, he was back in pull ups as he was spoiling himself upwards of 8 times a day. He was told to go to the loo to have a wee, he absolutely, knowingly was weeing in his pull up, cos he was being lazy! He knew it.

My son was 12. I didn't think he'd ever get there. He didn't either. He couldn't go on sleepovers with friends without taking big pull-ups. And then in the end he stopped. No idea what. We tried everything but we just had to wait.

All the best OP..

Can you go back to size 7/ 8 nappies? They would be much cheaper than the pyjama pants and the only different is the way they tape on rather than pull on.

I would also make sure she goes for a wee about 10 minutes before she is going to bed and then another wee right before bed and only put the pull-up (or nappy) on as she’s about to get into bed so she’s not got time to wee in it before falling asleep.

The ERIC website is also good for bedwetting advice: eric.org.uk/childrens-bladders/bedwetting/

My son became dry at night when he was 8. I never stressed about it. I knew it was hormone related and he'd be dry eventually, in his own time. It just happened naturally - I didn't try to train him or buy bed wetting alarms etc. That would have stressed him and us out. I spoke to a doctor and she said she doesn't worry unless someone is still frequently bedwetting during adolescence.

I would make sure she has her last wee literally before bed and put the pull ups on then. Pulls up are super absorbent and so you could insert something into the pull up that makes her feel a bit wet. The pull up will catch all the wee but the insert will make her aware she has weed and see if her body makes the connection.

It usually is a hormone called vasopressin and we did it all, GP, alarms, monitoring liquid input and output and the drug Desmopressin. It was definitely the hormone as the meds worked. Ds1 wasn't dry until year 6. The Eric website is brilliant.

Also the fact there are supermarket shelves given over to pull ups tells you how many parents buy them. I would be telling her that they are only for when she is asleep if she needs them and I would try a reward chart to motivate her to see if it is the lack of hormone.

My dd is 10 and still not dry at night. We have seen the incontinence nurse etc.(did this via a referral to school nurse) Nothing worked, nurse explained its a hormone thing.We dont stress about it , i think now it will just happen in time.

We had success with a bed wetting alarm with my DS - he was 6 and had never had a dry night. First time we tried no luck, we tried again a few months later and he was dry within 1-2 weeks.

It took until Year 5/6 primary age for one of my DC, tried everything beforehand: night alarms, measuring drinks, avoiding blackcurrant. Very frustrating for DC and us & a small fortune in pull-ups, absorbant sheets and a lot of washing! It finally resolved itself but unfortunately no short-cuts in this case. Your little one will get there in the end, they would rather be dry than wetting their bed so try and remain patient (hard I know).

If they aren't dry by 7 you can ask for a referral to an eneuresis clinic. DD was referred by the time she was 8.

They tried sticker charts. Advice as above in a PP. Stopping drinking at least an hour before bed, no dark drinks, no fizzy drinks, no acidic drinks, no milk (!). Then medication. Which was also of limited use.

She was finally FINALLY dry at about 13! She got her periods before she was completely dry!

It was q awkward (and upsetting for her) when dd2 came along and was instantly dry at night on the same week she was dry in the day.

My DS was in a pull up until he was 6. He was almost always soaked in the morning but I figured out that he was wetting just as he was waking up in the mornings. Eventually, I started setting an alarm for before 6am (he wouldn't usually wake until close to 7), waking him to go to the toilet and then gradually brought it later. It worked and he was out of them within a week or two. I had been beginning to think that he would never be dry at night.

I wouldn't put the pull-up on your DD at night until after she has done her bedtime wee though, literally as she is getting in to bed.

My first child was dry by age 3, but my 11yo isn't dry at night yet. We've seen the medical professionals, tried everything, and no progress. Have gone back to just trying to be really chilled and trying not to make him feel bad or self-conscious. It's tough for him, embarrassing and limiting. Hoping he'll grow out of it when he starts puberty.

OP, the Eric website is good for info and advice, which is the same advice we were given by incontinence team.

Don’t know all the details but my colleagues daughter was ‘late’ being dry at night. When she was 7 she ended up having a synthetic version of the hormone. parents are HCPs so don’t know if that made a difference or something else was happening.

DD1 was 5 or 6. She was the same, absolutely soaked, and it got to the stage the nappies were leaking because she was getting too big.

I know it goes against the usual advice but we lifted her when we went to bed for a few weeks and it worked.

Lidl pull up nappieswere pretty cheap. Also fitted waterproof sheets, you can usually get from ikea or asda.
youngest was dry at night at threeish, eldest 5ish, but I do think we might have left her in nappies too long, I think she was just doing her morning wee in the nappy because it was there. We ran out one day , so asked her to try to do without & Lo! Dry! So we just kept not buying them.
Tactical wee before bed.

We changed beds and nightwear without comment, it came and went with dry and wet periods . One day it just stopped.

Make no comment it's just sad for them and it will pass

DS was 12. I used an alarm around 8 which did help a bit. I didn't use pull ups but the disposable sheets and would layer up two lots so if he was wet I could strip off the top sheet and disposable and the dry set were already on. I also had a spare duvet in its cover ready as sometimes that was wet too. I got v v good at 3/4 minute sort outs at 2am. It just isn't something you can force.

Ds wasn’t dry at night until almost 7. It’s just one of those things. Everyone is right in saying it’s a hormone that keeps you dry at night, and it kicks in at different times for different children.