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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I've zero perspective so over to you lovely lot!

121 replies

Mumof2amazingasdkiddos · 31/12/2022 15:00

Person A was at my house yesterday and I made us both a cup of tea, I was then needed upstairs by my DD so I told person A to help themselves to a bit of chocolate out the fridge and I'd be back in about 5 mins. In the fridge there is a drawer full of assorted chocolate bars, there was also an unopened galaxy selection box. Person A opened the selection box and had a chocolate bar from that. As per the title I've no perspective as I despise Person A who unfortunately has regular reason to be in my house and whom I have to be civil to 🙄 so am i being unreasonable?

Yes you offered chocolate and Person A had chocolate what's the issue

No clearly you meant out of the drawer and you don't open someone's selection box

I'm not seriously annoyed btw it's just to gain perspective as I think Person a has been a cheeky twat lol

OP posts:
Original poster
Mumof2amazingasdkiddos · 31/12/2022 15:22

You've pretty much confirmed what I've suspected that I'm overreacting and yes anything this person does including breathing annoys me lol they are aware of the chocolate drawer as they regularly help themselves from it even without me offering! I just personally wouldn't open someone's selection box (and they are aware it's mine and was gifted to me)

OP posts:
Iwantmyoldnameback · 31/12/2022 15:23

I would not have offered chocolate.

UWhatNow · 31/12/2022 15:25

Ugh chocolate in the fridge. Why bother? Just eat ice.

KillingLoneliness · 31/12/2022 15:26

YABU for keeping chocolate in the fridge!
I personally wouldn’t have opened a selection box but another person may assume you meant any of the chocolate, if it was meant to be kept separate then you should have told them any chocolate apart from the selection box.

BackBeatTheWord · 31/12/2022 15:28

I'm quite careful in other people's homes so wouldn't have gone for an unopened box but I don't actually think there's anything wrong with it and wouldn't be annoyed since you specifically offered chocolate in the fridge.

BackBeatTheWord · 31/12/2022 15:29

It's all context though OP. Is she the kind of person who would deliberately go for the unopened box just to be difficult? If so I can understand being irritated (although doing my best not to show it).

CharlotteStreetW1 · 31/12/2022 15:30

Baddabingo · 31/12/2022 15:01

YABU for keeping chocolate in the fridge

😁

FictionalCharacter · 31/12/2022 15:30

Sorry, YABU. You told them to help themselves to chocolate but didn’t say “but not THAT chocolate!”
I think inviting someone you don’t like to help themselves to stuff from your fridge is an odd thing to do. Couldn’t you have just left them to drink their tea and offered a snack later?

CPL593H · 31/12/2022 15:34

If you liked this person you would not even miss a beat at this.

brusselspout · 31/12/2022 15:35

It's possible the opened the fridge and the first thing they saw was the selection box. It wouldn't occur to me to start opening drawers (which in my house are for veg) to look for other chocs tbf

purplecorkheart · 31/12/2022 15:36

I would have assumed the selection box belonged to a child and would not have touched it. Nor would I have taken any chocolate until you returned. Sometimes we have treats for ourselves saved and I would not wanted to take something that was being saved as a treat.

CleoandRalf · 31/12/2022 15:38

purplecorkheart · 31/12/2022 15:36

I would have assumed the selection box belonged to a child and would not have touched it. Nor would I have taken any chocolate until you returned. Sometimes we have treats for ourselves saved and I would not wanted to take something that was being saved as a treat.

You wouldn’t have taken any chocolate despite being explicitly told to take some chocolate?

SlagathaChristie · 31/12/2022 15:38

I'm sorry to derail, but what is a chocolate drawer in a fridge? Have you given the vegetable crisper over to your chocolate collection? If so I'm impressed and disgusted in equal measures.

Gunner1510 · 31/12/2022 15:38

Haha I was also going to ask if A is MIL..!!

I would ask before opening a selection box personally, but perhaps they saw that before the other chocolate and assumed it was up for grabs?

MrsMitford3 · 31/12/2022 15:40

Is it your MIL?

I also think if there are loose chocolates then I wouldn't open a closed selection box-I can see if they are someone who regularly annoys you breathing that this could be very annoying and overstepping.
You should have resisted the urge to offer one

stayathomer · 31/12/2022 15:43

I’d always be of the mindset you don’t open something unless there’s absolutely nothing where you’ve been told to get the food from. I’d think you’re definitely not being unreasonable but I seem to be wrong from the above comments!!!

wackamole · 31/12/2022 15:44

YABU for me. It's just miscommunication. If the bars were in a drawer and the box was visible on a shelf, she may not even have seen the bars and have just assumed the box was the "chocolate" you meant. (And if you HAD meant the box and she'd ignored it and gone rooting through drawers, some people would criticise that too.)

RandomMess · 31/12/2022 15:48

If it was your ex or close family YANBU because they would know the "rules" regarding chocolate in the fridge excluding the selection pack.

reallyhatewinter · 31/12/2022 15:48

OP, I just wanted to offer some solidarity because...
Chocolate does belong in the fridge!!!

CornishGem1975 · 31/12/2022 15:49

YABU. You said take chocolate from the fridge, which they did. You didn't specify.

BellePeppa · 31/12/2022 15:52

Well I wouldn’t have done it personally but they may have thought anything in there was fair game. Have a pack of plain biscuits to offer next time if they’re someone you don’t like but have to put up with 🙂

tiredmama23 · 31/12/2022 15:56

I think person A is an ex partner or STBEx, not MIL.

(Misses point of thread).

CountZacular · 31/12/2022 16:01

If I was told to take chocolate and saw loose bars and an unopened selection box, I’d take a loose chocolate bar. I think it would be unusual to open the selection box but can see how it would happen.

YABVVU to keep chocolate in the fridge though! Just why?!

Greatly · 31/12/2022 16:02

Why have you got so much chocolate in your fridge?

EasterIsland · 31/12/2022 16:06

You're protecting a Gaaxy selection box? Cheap chocolate? It's not as if it's Leonidas fresh cream chocolate.