To be upset neighbours didn't send cards?

[Anjali2023]

I thought we had a happy neighbourhood - why couldn't they be bothered to make the tiniest effort?

Going against the majority here... YANBU @Anjali2023 to be upset. You have a right to feel how you feel! I would be too. I sent cards to 20 neighbours, and 3 didn't send one back. I feel slighted and aggrieved, and it's irrational and ridiculous to feel this I know! The neighbours are friendly and lovely (all of them, including the ones who didn't send a card.) So I don't know why I am so bothered. Daft isn't it?! 😁 Even a couple of younger relatives didn't give me one, and I feel annoyed about that too. But not as annoyed as I feel at MYSELF for being bothered.

I am quite old-ish - late 50s, and I come from a time where everyone sent cards, and when people don't send one, I get a bit miffed. I want to NOT send one back next year (every time someone doesn't send one to me) but I can't send cards to 15-16 extended family and miss 2 out, and I can't send to 20 neighbours and miss 3 out. It's spiteful and petty. I can see how unreasonable and irrational I am, but cannot help how I feel. It's like the people who get aggrieved when people don't LIKE their facebook pics. Silly and irrational.

You ARE entitled to feel miffed but don't let it get to you that a few people didn't send cards. Here's one from me!

I gave a couple of cards to elderly neighbours and received cards from people I didn't give to .Doesn't mean I don't care just too busy .I certainly wouldn't take it personally.

Hope you are not my neighbour! A few of our neighbours still send cards. What my neighbours don’t seem to see is that we are really bloody struggling! We are juggling young kids with no family help, work, an invisible illness. Life is stressful enough. I actually feel bad about it and I know they will probably all be gossiping about us I am sorry neighbours if you are on here! But I think for a lot of people it’s just time, money, environment.

Yep . It's just a polite way of saying no more cards . I doubt wether they do give to charity .

I don't think it's unusual but we always do cards on our road. There are a few on the street who are elderly and either on their own or who don't have family who visit etc, and they always really appreciate a card and being thought of at Christmas

I haven't sent any cards at all this year.
We've received 4 cards in total.

I think it's just not something people really do so much these days, even more so since covid.

I don't send any.

Lots of people don't send cards anymore. It's no reflection on how much you like someone. However the only cards I did send this year were to a few of my neighbours because they're all older couples who send them to us and I was being polite. There are plenty of people who I like alot more than my neighbours who didn't get the pleasure of my name hurriedly scrawled in a charity card!

This year I sent a grand total of 3 cards to relatives.

I don't think people really bother anymore, don't take it personally.

Going against the trend here. I still send cards and love receiving them. I always buy from charity shops and they're all recyclable. If it is a dying tradition I think it's a shame.

Same here. I sent about 50 in total, (family/colleagues/neighbours/friends,) and got about 44 back. About 18 to 20 or so sent them before I sent mine. People aged 18 to 88. It is not a 'dying trend' as some claim, and it's only on mumsnet/threads like this, that many people claim they don't send them, and say stuff like 'no-one I know sends cards.'

I only send to elderly family and friends as they seem to like and expect them.

I've always thought it sad to cut trees down to make them. They get binned/recycled very quickly.

You basically open it, read it then pile them up or do fiddly displays with them for just a few days.

Combine them with the cost of sending them , it seems like a bonkers thing to do.

Interesting to see that many retailers have been discounting them before Christmas.

I think cards have had their day.

I have enough to send to family, close friends and favourite colleagues. We like our neighbours but we don't want our card list any longer.

This

We bought a house this year and the previous owner only did a month's mail redirection so we've received a few cards for him without a return address (along with loads of DVLA, Vodafone and National Trust mailings!). So the cards have all gone in the recycling.

I do wonder how well some of these people knew him though - one was addressed to 'Mr and Mrs PreviousOwner'. He'd been a widower for quite a few years before selling the house so clearly the person sending the Christmas card had no idea his wife had died! What is the point of that?!

I think people used covid as an excuse to break Christmas card giving . When you factor in the cost of a stamp to send the things it's not worth it . People stay in touch via social media now . Hope fully children still make them at school for their parents . I used to love getting them off my DC when they were small.

On one side the neighbours stopped during the pandemic. No idea why as they are the older generation and retired.

But we only say hello about once a year anyway. I still thought it strange.

It is something I have massively cut down on doing.

I
myst be tne worst neighbour in the world. I don’t even know what my neighbours look like. Thank goodness. They are quiets and so am I and we coexist. You’d obviously have a pink fit living in my neighbourhood @Anjali2023

I meant to but was doing 12 hour days before Christmas and forgot. These things happen

I’ve a wide circle of long-standing friends and colleagues and had less than 5 cards. It’s definitely a dying trend in some circles. It’s clear as well in the shops. Places used to have huge amounts of cards and they don’t anymore. I think those who still send will be more likely to get them back.

You are not being unreasonable. Last year I sent out cards and received them from some of my neighbors. This year nothing just received one card that too was for the previous owners mistakenly sent here.

I didn't have any falling out with anyone so it just seems odd.

I’ve just thought about it, and I literally do not know anyone who sends cards. I haven’t sent or received any. That might not be real life to you but it is my real life! I did however talk to my friends in our very active WhatsApp group yesterday, as we do most days, whereas on mumsnet you’re needy if you want to speak to friends more than once a month!

I've been under the care of The Community Mental HealthTeam so nothing has been done. I had such high hopes having bought lovely Pete McKee charity cards, but there they sit forlorn, unwritten.

I have been ill with an awful virus since the end of November, I know lots of people suffering from similar. Managed to keep working, other than a couple of days I just couldn’t, as about half my hours are self- employed so no sick pay. I barely got the essentials (for my 7-year-old DD) of Christmas prepared this year, anything extra has had to fall by the wayside.

People ‘on Mumsnet and on threads line these’ are people in real life too you know . I can assure you I’m an actual human being in real life and that I don’t send cards, and the vast majority of my friends and family don’t either, bar the elderly. In my circle it’s very much a dying (dead) trend.