Worst Wedding Reception Ever?

[TheShellBeach]

I am still trying to get my head round this one.

It was a friend's wedding last week and they happy couple invited twelve people to their reception.

After the ceremony (which was lovely) we went back to the couple's house.

There was no wedding cake. No drinks. We made ourselves cups of tea and coffee.

Then the groom handed out menus for the local curry house. Once we'd all picked what we wanted, he asked us to transfer the cost of our orders to his bank account, before he phoned up and placed the order.

After we'd eaten and tidied up, the newlyweds asked us to leave because they were tired.......................no speeches, no fun, no dancing, no music and NO FOOD provided.

AIBU to think this was the worst wedding reception ever?

Presumably you know them very well and very very close to have been invited to such an intimate wedding.

So was this a complete surprise to you? Ie they always have been very extravagant and generous. Or was this very much the norm for them?

The viper is the Op

starts a thread about her very close friends intimate wedding, how shit it was, on a huge chat forum that is often picked up by the DM

Thlnk you need to read subsequent posts from OP

Deff getting picked up by the daily Mail this 😂

The reception sounds odd, you also sound odd.

Curry can only of cost you 30-40 quid though? Usually expect to spend that at a wedding reception on drinks ect. Or did you expect to spend nothing?

Yes she goes from very close friends to distant relatives

and adds more detail when people don’t immediately agree with her.

🤣 🤣

Sounds fine apart from having to pay for your own curry!

if that's what they wanted, it's a shame they wasted one of the limited invitations on someone who wasn't a true friend (ie you). I am sure they had a good time and that is what is important.

I’ve had worse! Couple invited 30 guests,we arrived at what looked like a local youth activity center in some town hall, lots of food in boxes and tables on top of one another. We were informed by bride and groom we needed to set up the tables, unpack the food, heat it up, place it in dishes and distribute it on tables. After two hours of hard work and once we were all hungry and sitting on the tables infront of our meals the bride and groom asked us for an 8000 pounds donation as they wanted to adopt a Moroccan baby.

One year later they got divorced. They never adopted any baby.

YANBU

you say "Once we'd all picked what we wanted, he asked us to transfer the cost of our orders to his bank account, before he phoned up and placed the order."

does that mean he expected the money to be transferred right away, or just that he calculated each cost and gave you a note of it to pay later?

I can't believe I just typed that!

Other than asking you all to pay for your food, that sounds pretty good to me, actually! No boring speeches, no terrible dance expectations, no extortionately expensive decorations/accessories, everyone can get food they actually like instead of having to pretend you like the overpriced meal that everyone else is having too...

I get that some people (a lot of people actually) like a fancy reception, but it's not to everyone's taste, so good on them for doing it their way.

Although they should have paid for the food.

This, except they should have paid for it.

I’m curious

Was this entirely out of character for them?

Sounds like some on MNs idea of the best wedding ever, since there seems to be a race to the bottom on who spent the least on their big day.

But YANBU, sounds absolutely shit

Cross post

my jaw is on the basement floor!! (Not that we have one but you get the point).

Seriously? Shit evenings out are easy to come by, fill your boots. I can't see how this could possibly have been anything but grim.

I mean if it’s what they wanted then it’s the right reception for them… but it doesn’t sound like a celebration to me.

also a bit rude to invite everyone to your house and then ask them to pay for the food.. (unless you know before hand or they’ve not got much cash)

They sound like the worst hosts in the world. Make your own tea? What?

I can understand them not wanting speeches, music and dancing, but a table sitting waiting with some drinks and snacks on it wouldn't have cost the earth. And charging guests for their own meal is just embarrassingly awful.

Beats me why folk like that don't take off and get married privately with zero guests. I'm not social and I hate weddings, but I wouldn't have such a strange hybrid half-assed affair. Just sounds weird.

OP, were the parents of the bride and groom present?

I have 4 dds and it wouldn’t occur to them to plan a wedding reception like the one you have described. They know full well that it is unacceptable.

You bought a new outfit and a fascination for a couple that you met once at a wedding years ago, and is a distant relation of your DH (oh but in the Op they are friends)

If they wanted to keep costs down, they could have bought a bunch of cheap party food items from somewhere like Iceland.

Alternatively, they could have made it a potluck. They still wouldn't have had to pay, but it would felt personal and low-key rather than tight.

If they'd been made redundant three days before the wedding, they could have contacted all the guests to say as much, and to say that they were turning the reception into a potluck, no need to bring a wedding present too. People would have brought food and a present anyway, and everyone would have felt happier.

It's just the way they went about it that spoilt the intimate casual reception that I assume they were going for.

That is undeniable but it cost us £50 for a present and I bought a new outfit

I hear you. I don’t agree with the “their day” trumps everything nonsense.

It was easier to refer to them as "friends" than "cousins a hundred times removed" of DH's.

Yes, I did buy an outfit and a new fascinator. Why not? There will be other weddings and celebrations, I hope?