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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

colleague drives past my house every morning...

122 replies

BarrelOfOtters · 23/12/2022 10:35

That part is fine, it's on her way to work. But I get a comment almost every day - saw a van on your drive - are you getting more work done? Saw your husband putting the cat in the car - off to the vets? Whose is the blue car?

I'm not particularly bothered by it but just enough to think - you know?

Wondering what I can say/do to put her off a bit.

OP posts:
LubaLuca · 23/12/2022 10:37

This sounds great, you could ask her for a lift and fill her in on all the comings and goings on the way.

Summerhillsquare · 23/12/2022 10:37

Ask her why she hasn't offered a lift to work!

PAFMO · 23/12/2022 10:37

You clearly are bothered though.
Just say "oh as long as you didn't spot him in his red thong letting the neighbours in for our weekly naked Morris dancing session"

TidyDancer · 23/12/2022 10:37

Do you think she's trying to be friendly and strike up conversation or is she generally quite nosy? I can imagine it would get very trying after a while.

Iwanttoslowdown · 23/12/2022 10:38

That’s weird - like surveillance. Be blunt and say it’s weirding you out.

SerenaTee · 23/12/2022 10:39

“You’re very observant when you’re driving, are you keeping a log?”

AnonyMum21 · 23/12/2022 10:39

Put her off what though..?
You obviously can’t stop her looking at your house, or wondering about what is going on in your personal life - so do you just want ideas of what to say to ‘put her off’ from commenting or asking you about it?

Quincythequince · 23/12/2022 10:40

‘Ooooooh, a mobile curtain twitcher, how lovely. Let’s hope you don’t cause an accident whilst staring at my house every morning’

Leave it at that!

Original poster
BarrelOfOtters · 23/12/2022 10:41

Slightly worried she might want to join in on a naked Morris dancing session....

OP posts:
summergone · 23/12/2022 10:41

I have a colleague like this , literally wants to know everything about my life it's exhausting and annoying . I lost my patience with her about a month ago and snapped at her and she has massively scaled back now , thank god

AngelontopoftheTree · 23/12/2022 10:45

I think I'd have to say "you seem to know more about what's going on in my house than I do! If ever we have a burglary I'll make sure to send the police over to you to ask what you saw"
Then laugh 😆

FoxtrotOscarFoxtrotOscar · 23/12/2022 10:45

Reply: the less said about that the better!!!

It gives her no info but it is an answer.

Repeat ad nauseum.

AngelontopoftheTree · 23/12/2022 10:48

summergone · 23/12/2022 10:41

I have a colleague like this , literally wants to know everything about my life it's exhausting and annoying . I lost my patience with her about a month ago and snapped at her and she has massively scaled back now , thank god

I'll bet she never shares any information about her own life. I have an aunt like this; wants to know everything about everyone else, but God forbid anyone knows anything about her.

ichundich · 23/12/2022 10:49

I'd say something passive-aggressive like "You're very observant, aren't you?"

TrixJax · 23/12/2022 10:51

AngelontopoftheTree · 23/12/2022 10:45

I think I'd have to say "you seem to know more about what's going on in my house than I do! If ever we have a burglary I'll make sure to send the police over to you to ask what you saw"
Then laugh 😆

This is good ^

pizzaHeart · 23/12/2022 10:52

love the suggestion from @FoxtrotOscarFoxtrotOscar
Can’t use it myself, my relative who loves to comment like this lives in a different country now but I will bank the idea in my brain just in case.

BlusteryLake · 23/12/2022 10:54

She's probably trying to make small talk, but it sounds incredibly annoying. I would move the conversation straight on to something more general. So for the van on driveway scenario, I would say "Thinking about it. It's so hard to get people to come and quote at the moment isn't it? I guess costs are going up..." etc etc

Gagaandgag · 23/12/2022 10:58

Tell her you moved and you don’t live there anymore

user1496262496 · 23/12/2022 11:03

Ask her if she is outside your house on an evening with her night vision goggles and a real tree suit.

cherrycheesecakesouffle · 23/12/2022 11:03

Summerhillsquare · 23/12/2022 10:37

Ask her why she hasn't offered a lift to work!

I live near a colleague and have given them a lift on the odd occasion but you can’t expect someone to provide regular lifts - which is what this sounds like it would be.

I ended up waiting 30 extra minutes for my colleague to finish as they asked for a lift. When I just wanted to get home.

SixCharactersinSearchofanAuthor · 23/12/2022 11:06

Can you write "Happy Xmas Pam" in post its on your windows?

Featheryboa · 23/12/2022 11:06

Some people are nosy. There was a school mum who lived down the same road as me. She was talking about the glass collection and said 'we hardly drink so don't use it, but I notice you do Feathery,' Hmm
She was an unfriendly type as well..

Emotionalsupportviper · 23/12/2022 11:12

LubaLuca · 23/12/2022 10:37

This sounds great, you could ask her for a lift and fill her in on all the comings and goings on the way.

This.

And make up lies about the rest.

"The van belongs to someone we rent the drive to on Thursdays"

"No - it's not our cat - it looks like a cat but it's a massive rat that's been getting into our OAP neighbour's garden. We didn't want to upset the kids by poisoning it so DH took it to the river, weighted it down and drowned it."

The blue car is a DS's music teacher's. He's been identified as a child prodigy for the bassoon, and the London Philharmonic have offered free lessons . . . "

Cas112 · 23/12/2022 11:13

Just say.. are you usually this nosey haha she will soon stop

RoseBucket · 23/12/2022 11:13

You could have so much fun with that! Really get some stories going, put a Morning … banner up. Cut outs at the window.

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