colleague drives past my house every morning...

[BarrelOfOtters]

That part is fine, it's on her way to work. But I get a comment almost every day - saw a van on your drive - are you getting more work done? Saw your husband putting the cat in the car - off to the vets? Whose is the blue car?

I'm not particularly bothered by it but just enough to think - you know?

Wondering what I can say/do to put her off a bit.

‘I wish you didn’t know where I lived’

😂😂😂

This tickled me

"Are you training to be a private detective?"

Tell her you've moved.

Reply “hmmm yesssss” to every question, look into the distance, smile, and walk away.

Omg one of the mums at school was like this - I felt she was stalking me! Every where I went she seemed to turn up. Or she'd say 'oh I saw your car parked in X street - what were you doing?' Or she'd say 'drove past your house and saw your roof lights open but I had thought you were away'.
I found out I wasn't the only one - other people said how odd it was she always seemed to be wherever they were going or knew too much stuff. Plus she was a stirrer. I ran into her n the street and said that I was to meet a mutual friend but she just cried off as she had an appointment she forgot about. The woman said 'oh I know it's for a mammogram'. I knew that too, and that it was probably just routine, so I said that. But the woman said 'oh? But who can tell? You never know! It might be something!'. Argh! She eventually moved to another country but she was legendary!

“We’re sex people, Lynn”

Ask if she is KGB

I really doubt she even cared about your life...she was probably trying to make conversation and be friendly.

use my teen’s favourite deadpan comment
’Why are you so obsessed with me, Pam?’

"Oh, the builder/my husband said he saw someone staring out of their car at him! He thought it was our nosy neighbour. I'll tell him it was you."

Say, what cat?

Put pampas grass in your front garden

Maybe she’s just trying to make conversation?

I actually giggled out loud at this post 😆

I'd make some ridiculous jokey comments back, like "the blue car? That's my ex husband who's moved in with us for a while" or "my husband putting the cat in the car? No that's your brother after staying the night".

It might shock her enough into not being such a nosy Nora!

Does she have to drive out of the way to go past your house or is on her commute.

I'm in crabbit form today so these are my offerings

Just say ...Next time you're passing give me a 5 minute warning and we'll come out and you can take our picture.

Alternatively ....... bloody hell you must have a very dull life if the front of my house is your highlight of the day.

Or...no need to get cctv to protect the house now with you around.

🤣🤣🤣

Some of this for your garden would be a good idea

I would be tempted to set up strange things going on
Sumo wrestler or dinosaur costume fights in the garden
Weird items sticking out of the wheelie bin
Borrow a monster truck
Flash mob singers
Guerilla yarn bombing

You could have some real fun, if you got some other people to help

About the same thing, every day, even when it doesn't prompt the back-&-forth most people perceive as 'conversation'?

If she was after conversation, she'd realise that nosiness about OP's house wasn't getting her any, so she'd switch to something else. Like every other normal colleague "did you see X factor" etc. Just as mind-numbingly boring, but zero intrusiveness.

She's doing it to score some sort of point. I bet she knows exactly what she's doing & is relishing the plausible deniability of making OP uncomfortable.
It's a territorial display, albeit a very childish, stupid one. "I saw your house when you didn't see me, so ner, I win".

Also, sorry cannot remember which genius suggested it, but I'm on Team Blanket-Wrapped Mannequin Legs Protruding From Blue Car Boot.
"I know Pam! It's awful but what else could we do? You won't tell anyone, will you? You don't seem the nosy type, so I'm sure we can trust you not to blab."

Next time she notices anything at your property you could say you’ll have to check the security camera…and that you’ve noticed her regularly on camera driving past and staring at your house.

😂😂😂

Can the flash mob singers rehearse a provocatively piss-taking song for her drive-by please? Happy to collaborate on lyrics

Yes, the best approach.

@AngelontopoftheTree spot on there ! But I think she leads a very boring life tbh and the little bits she does say I'm not entirely sure are true !

Do you have (or can you get) a good quality photo of her? Blow it up to a massive size (ask at your local printer for 'the Bishop Brennan' - maybe see if they can also photoshop some net curtains on to it) and then attach it to the front of your house just before she drives by.