To ask you to tel me all the shit things about having a dog?

[ProserpinaProserpina]

Two preschool DCs, small house, large garden. I’m desperate for a dog. DH works from home in a workshop in the garden. Dog would spend most of the day with him. We’ve both had dogs before and live an active, outdoorsy lifestyle. I can’t think of any occasions that we go out to anywhere that a dog couldn’t come, and there is very rarely not someone home. I work 3 days per week but like I say, husband is around. I’m happy to do evening walks as required, dog could have the run of the garden all day every day, and DH has a very flexible (read: easy) schedule which would allow the dog to be walked as much as needed.

DH is happy with whatever and does absolutely adore dogs but is more pragmatic than me. He’s very much of the ‘if you want a dog, we’ll get one but it won’t be easy’ attitude which I’m a bit worried might bite me on that arse when things are difficult.

So please, tell me all the shit things about having a dog and why it’s a terrible idea to have a dog and children so that I can make a truly informed decision (ie. Not do it).

Oh god where do I start. Hate dogs 🤣 if you want one and you can afford it though just get one!

£ Vet bills
Keeping the garden poo free
£ Insurance cost
Days out have to be very well planed
£ replacing chewed items
Remember the cold / snow / ice a few days ago ? You still gave to take your pooch out in that
£ good winter coat / boots for the above
Restricted holidays
£ kennel cost

More £s than you can shake a kong stick at

I would still have another dog even with all of the above if I could give it enough time I work full time so sadly that's not going to happen

They're a bit stinky, and a bit barky, and their food is quite expensive, and they shit in your garden, and my goodness the cost of kennels when you go away.

But they are the most wonderful, kind, forever friend animals, we absolutely adore ours and you should 100% get one!

OMG, sooooo cute!!

OP - the main downside to having our dog is the hair carpet that's everywhere.

But it's a small price to pay, he's the best part of our family!

I think the PPs have covered it, just would add, cannot understate how tying they are; and how messy . I have 2 labs.
Would never want to be without them, which is just as well as they are my shadows.

“Dog could have the run of the garden” and you have 2 pre schoolers. How much dog shit will you have to clean off them if nobody is watching and cleaning up immediately? Or are you going to block off an area for the dog?

And they are so needy! You can't go anywhere and leave them. It's like have a large smelly 2 year old with you ALL THE TIME!

Amazing how anyone manages to bring up young kids and dogs anywhere ever.

Over a decade of picking up shit, the impact on landfill of all that untreated waste , mostly wrapped in plastic dripping into the water systems.
All the extra animals being raised and slaughtered to feed another dog.
maybe a dog lover could design a garden squatty loo for dogs ?

Horribly expensive, random (you may get a trainable one which will take two years to get to anything approaching reliable or you may get a reactive/fearful/ arsehole dog that continues to nick stuff/run off/bark/resource guard can you tell we've had more of the latter). Ermm, most of Mumsnet will hate you for being "an irresponsible dog owner". You'll get a few good years then senility/loss of bladder then the bloody thing will die and you'll be heart broken.

Vet fees, not being able to go for long days out or overnight without taking the dog. Kennels or taking dog on holiday. When they have diarrhoea. Hairs everywhere. Muddy footprints in wet weather.

Join a waiting list for a reputable breeder, and that will give you plenty of time to be sure you're doing the right thing, and for your children to grow up a bit.

This as well, the environmental impact of a dog.

It's all good and well having a big garden if you have no neighbours. I have one quiet calm dog, one psychotic barky dog. Neighbours complain ALL THE TIME, even if I've just let him out for a week as if he hears them, he will bark. So if you end up with a barker, they can't necessarily have the run of the garden.

You can't always take them everywhere. Last minute trips are a no-no if you don't have doggy day-care on tap. Kids can sometimes lose interest. You could end up with a psychotic dog like mine who doesn't like other dogs despite hundreds being spent on training.

Other than that, it's great fun!

I’ll start by saying the love between my DD & DDog is the best love in the world. She cares for him, she includes him in every game she plays & he returns the love tenfold. He sleeps at night with her, waits for her & we’re like a trio, comes everywhere with us.

The bad :
dog needs walking all weathers no matter how I’ll/tired you are
soaking wet dogs shaking over everything
vets bills
cant go anywhere without sorting the dog
bad habits (maybe specific to mine) he picks ear wax out & eats it & eats like a pig!

however, the joy & love my dog brings outweighs everything- I would literally starve for him & I will need bereavement councilling when he leaves this world, I adore him.

your setup sounds perfect for a dog!

The worst thing about dogs is that they die and break your heart.

Other than that, nothing. You sound like you could provide a lovely home.

I can’t think of any pros.

cons;
dog hair
dog saliva on things (and people)
chewing furniture
having to still walk them when your unwell, it’s freezing outside, snow, ice etc
can’t do impromptu days out
having to arrange care for planned days out
sorting kennels for holidays
wee and poo in the house when training
may restrict guests due to allergies / phobias
smell of dog & dog food in the house, no matter how clean you are, people can always smell dog
picking up poo on walks
cant ever leave the room with a dog and a child

I find the puppy stage a PITA, it might be hard with a puppy and small children due to chewing things/biting.
They have smelly feet.
They die.

As someone who has a 5 month old cocker spaniel puppy -

-The biting stage when they are cutting teeth is super stressful with kids (get a big crate or a doggy playpen because they will need to be separated lots of times).
-Walking them when you don’t feel well.
-They cost far more than you think in terms of vet plans, insurance, food, snacks, treats, leads, coats, harnesses, treatment etc
-The fur is endless, i hoover and 2 minutes later it looks like I haven’t bothered
-They chew anything they can get their paws on and they ruin your garden
-Spontaneous days out are impossible unless it’s a national trust type place, it’s even difficult to go to places like the cinema etc until they are old enough to be left for any decent length of time.

But, despite him being a pain in the arse he’s amazing and we all adore him!

Unless you get on a long waiting list for a reputable breeder you will be supporting the ever growing hideous back-yard-breeder trend.

Do not get one with pre-schoolers. The first few weeks/months are awful as you wonder what in God’s name you were thinking. For all your sakes wait until the children are older and can understand the cues from the dog.

They are always more expensive than you anticipate. If you get a rescue the purchase is cheaper of course but the vets bills, the insurance, the food etc is a LOT.

You can never have impromptu days
out or weekends away.

Think really carefully. I know that everyone has one these days but it is a massive commitment particularly with such young children.

My dogwalker just sent me a photo of a destroyed dog bed-they'd been alone for 2.5 hours. Been through a few cables/beds. Lie ins are tricky, but hopefully will return once they pups grow up a bit. They're just over a year. Big dog has never been destructive.

We have 2 dogs, ones a newer young dog and we forgot how hard the puppy stage is! She's now 7 months
I'd recommend having a look at the puppy threads.

You have to really want a dog. This week for example both me and my partner are awfully unwell. We still have to take the puppy out in the rain, snow and ice. She's easily bored so any naps on the sofa usually means she's shredding or chewed something. Throughout the awful snow, ice, cold and bitter rain our pup has needed multiple walks a day. If you are toilet training then you'll be out in it every hour for a while, even now she needs to be taken out several times a day.

Puppies are like little landsharks and often bite with sharp teeth, they will chew precious things, steal kid toys and jump up at little kids. Our ones worst habit is incessant barking at our faces currently

The biggest drawback for me is the constantly having to think about them and build them in. Leaving them for 4 hours sounds like a lot but is quickly eaten up eg a day shopping by the time you drive 40 min each way, have lunch then you feeling like your driving back again! You'll have to have dog care for things like days to the zoo, beach days or any full days out like visiting relatives, even things like going to birthdays parties can end up being long time out. You also have to build up to 4 hours, so it's not like that's immediate.

I have to be constantly aware of where she's at in her routine, and can't even just obviously invite people round without thinking if she might be too much for them and they might be put off by a yappy puppy

For me the things that make it easier is having a good partnership where you share walks. I've seen way too many mums being left to drag kids out in the rain because the dog needs out, and the kids can't be left. Reliable dog sitters are a god send and mean you don't always have to go camping but also that you can do thing's like go to IKEA!

Ours other is an older rescue so had similar issues, so it's not always that you can skip the puppy stage by getting an older dog as they often need a good few months to settle

For me it's a bit like having kids. They are a massive tie, they are hard work and I miss the days where I didn't have to think about it. I don't blame people who chose not to having dogs or kids, and think that people should take it seriously but I would do it again in a heartbeat. They also bring me great joy, and for me watching our pup develop into a cracking adult is worth it. We can take the lifestyle hit.

When they eat cat shit on a walk and spend 3 days throwing up and shitting everywhere.

And roll in fox poo.

And moult. You have to hoover twice a day.

That they die.
(When they do, you are left with the same lovely pre-dog life you had before... and you can see how empty and poor it is.)

They can be expensive especially when they decide every couple of months that they don't like their food anymore then you have to go on the hunt for something they like AND that won't break the bank.

You have to consider them in all your plans e.g. holidays and days out.

They don't just know how to behave. You have to work with them.

And as others have said they go too soon and break your heart.