Is this an awful present for a 14 year old?

[DobbleBobble]

I have 14 and 8 year olds, both get stockings and (small-ish) Santa presents plus presents / money from family. 14 year old has always been full of Christmas magic, never had a conversation about no Santa, last time he asked was 4 years ago and I just reminded him how much he loves the build up and if he doesn't believe he will lose that (8 year old has never questioned, I don't think she ever had any Christmas magic although she still loves the holiday and is my best bet for watching a Christmas film).

So, scene set, my 14 year old doesn't want anything for Christmas, there are a couple of things he wants but to do with computer games and he is very aware that it's all a rip off and he doesn't really want to spend money on it. He has chocs, a t-shirt and a couple of things he might like plus money and probably a computer voucher from family, but his stocking is quite empty (compared with sisters and previous years) and I'm thinking rather than trying to fill it I put a note from Santa (obviously he knows that is me although we haven't discussed it) saying he's growing up, nice to see he appreciates what he has, stocking a bit empty, no child should be without gifts so hope he likes what has been chosen for him and Santa has given an extra gift of xxx to a child whose family can't treat them like his can.

I feel happy with that and I think he would be but what do you think, is it Christmas ruined for a 14 year old and what on earth do I do instead if it is?

OP. Again. What the heck did you mean about your DD not having "Christmas magic"? You sound a bit bonkers sorry.

Stocking fillers are all over the shops. As the mother of 6 boys, I was always able to find things to fill stockings with. Deodorant sets, socks, underwear, chocolates, games (computer or otherwise), hair products (yep, they all use wax and whatever), pyjamas, tops, jumpers, lots of things!

Please don’t put the letter in. It’s unbelievable at 14 and will just make him wonder why you couldn’t have got him other things. My stockings were always massive things so each year was a bit of a nightmare in terms of thinking outside the box, but the rule was always, once 18, you get money and just little things to open, so this year, I’m getting my 18 y.o. chocolates (I have boxes I fill as selection boxes are a waste of money), underwear (because who doesn’t need underwear after a year?), socks but not plain ones, some cheap t shirts to wear in bed/when he gets out of bed, and a lynx deodorant set. And then he’ll get some money, amount not determined yet.

My 17 y.o. daughter is getting a rug for her room, cosmetics (I’ll make up a basket), underwear, chocolates and a thing for jigsaw puzzles to roll up in, as she likes doing jigsaws, maybe a book or 2 and some money as well, but a token amount.

Husband, who is really hard to buy for will get whisky, underwear, socks, chocolates.

I sent my 14 yo a letter from FC saying how proud we/he were for him getting into some amazing scholarship programs. Santa also told him not to take drugs and make good choices. He's now 26 and it's still his favorite letter! Say what you like but say it from your heart.

This would totally make my Christmas 🤣

It seems you don’t want him to grow up. I think it is a bit ridiculous at that age that you still want him to keep believing in Santa; he can keep the magic for younger sibling and still enjoy Christmas. Mine love Christmas, doing the decorations, buying presents, wrapping them and putting them under the tree; but don’t believe in Santa anymore.

Just find extra things to fill the stocking.

If he is was 12 or under maybe; but 14? A Santa Letter?

Uhhhhh poundshop

We put in an apple, orange, nuts, their favorite candy, chocolate stuff, this year I bought a variety of things, rechargable flashlight, magnifiying glass with lights, wifi hat and a headlamp hat for one dc, and an actual , powerful head lamp for another(was on their wish list) a card holder, a wallet, notepads and pens. Don't know what dh bought yet but he usually gets flash drives and beef jerky.

That's a terrible idea, sorry. It's also a terrible idea to fill his stocking with boring things like deodorant and pants, he'll just be disappointed.

Just add the money you would spend on crap filler presents with the money you were going to donate to charity (because you were actually going to donate, weren't you?) and either buy him the computer game he wants or give him cash.

I think scrap the stocking and give cash. Do teens really want christmas mugs and smellies sets?! Let him buy his own tat if he wants.

I know that older boys are trickier to buy for but I still found loads of silly stocking fillers for my boy who is a similar age. He has daft socks, the obligatory Lynx set, sweets, a silly little kids wind up game to remind him of when he was little and play in the morning, badges, a book, playing cards, a beanie, a ridiculous T-shirt that he was laughing at recently - that sort of thing. Little bits that I saw and thought of him. There are loads of good ideas in this thread. He still absolutely loves a stocking and all the silly stuff inside it.

Ds always appreciates those cans of compressed air for clearing dust from keyboards, also huge mud for his cups of coffee

I don't understand how you even thought to write him a letter for Christmas pretending to santa telling him you couldn't think of anything to get him but he should appreciate what you have got him (a t shirt and chocolate) and you've bought a present for a random stranger instead. It's an absurd idea.

He's only got the idea that spending money on games is a waste of money from you. Of course spending money on something he'll enjoy is no more a waste of money than spending money on a toy.

You can easily fill a stocking with snacks, a bag of doritos would take up most space.

He's clearly used to not getting much because you don't buy alot. Whether that's because you can't afford more is your business. But not getting him anything because you don't know what to get him is really just a bit shit. Any person would feel gutted that their parent couldn't be arsed to buy them anything or thought it was just a waste of money.

I've a 16 year old who doesn't want anything and we've never discussed Father Christmas 🤷🏼‍♀️. Not sure what your problem is!

I have never struggled to get stuff for my teen son’s stocking.

I have always put a gift card in teen stockings. Why is it a cop-out?

He really wants the computer games. He knows how you feel about them, so he says, it’s too much money. My son says the same about team football kit tops. I know he wants them and still buy them for Xmas or birthdays despite him saying the tops cheap nasty polyester ugly clothes cost too much. We both know they are a rip-off but I buy him one anyway. He loves them.

It is time to take a break from being worthy and sharing said worthiness with the internet. Put your son first. And give to charity quietly.

I get it. 14 yo boys can be very difficult to fill a stocking for.

I got mine:
Lego
a tic tac toe game
a silly thumb piano
undies
socks
putty for cleaning his keyboard
a metal bulldozer that he has to make
a bracelet
some chocs
a salami
a couple of books
a Marvel poster
an LED frisbee

Surely it can’t be that difficult to bulk out? Add a chocolate Santa and some chocolate coins and it’s already half full.
Bag of Christmas Percy pigs

I don't really allow many in app purchases for games so when mine got a roblox gift card in their stocking it was the best thing ever they still talk about it nearly a year later 😂

OP take yourself to B&M. You’ll fill a stocking in no time.

Please don’t do the note/card saying “Santa” has given his gift to another child or whatever it was you were going to write. He sounds like a lovely young teen. But no one wants to get a card saying their present has been given to a more needy person, unless that’s what they requested. It’s just not a present.

By all means give a donation to a charity in both your names before Christmas. Do it now, with him, would be my suggestion. But fill up his stocking, yeah? Don’t make it one or the other. Posters have given you a whole host of suggestions of what you can give him.

Xmas is meant to be fun and frivolous (within the realms of what is poss spending and budget-wise of course). He might say I want x but it's wasteful, but he's 14...spoil the kid a bit. This note and an empty or crap stocking is pretty mean. Your poor ds. Pls do better, because otherwise it will hurt.

I haven't read the whole thread so if I'm repeating what others have said, I'm sorry!
Google computer gamer gifts, there are loads of ideas big and small, Amazon have t shirts, socks, gooey stuff for cleaning keyboards etc

That’s not a present and it’s easy to fill a stocking with useful things for a 14 year old boy. For example DS (13) has: Nike sports socks, thick, warm gloves, a magazine (you could get a gaming magazine), a tube of peelable, charcoal face mask, a Parker pen with his name engraved on it so he hopefully won’t lose it at school, a Lush bath bomb.

Some suggestions- funko pops (strange little toys of his favourite characters), fidget spinners, books, chess/draughts/poker/dobble/puzzle/board game, annual, books/socks of favourite characters (ds got excited seeing Sampson’s socks in penny’s the other day!), sweets, lynx/shower stuff/toes little plug in lights of their favourite show/ Lego/something he has to build.

A Gregg's gift card is absolutely genius, banking this idea for future Christmases!

That is so cringey!!!!