I’m not sending Christmas cards this year, I’m donating to charity

[UseAMuckySock]

Why is everyone announcing this on Facebook lately? Are we supposed to tell them how amazing and thoughtful they are?

It's to let people know what you are doing and not to be offended if they don't receive a card from you.

I posted a link to the specific charity as it is something related to a cause I believe in and I have a lot of friends in the same sphere so they might like to consider doing the same.

I buy my card from a chosen charity.

The people who would most appreciate a Christmas card are usually the people not on Facebook. I know a lot of older people are online now but life is increasingly lonely for those who are not, I definitely don't begrudge them a card and a stamp once a year if it adds a tiny bit of brightness to their day.

I always send a personal message in my christmas cards. It takes a fair amount of time and effort to do them, but the people I keep in touch with this way are worth it.

I also separately raise money for local charities at Christmas, but don't announce this on Facebook.

Nothing wrong with that, if people don't like it it's tough isn't it. I talk about my late parents a lot, I didn't used to. My father died when I was a child and I don't think I talked about him very much when my children were little but I talk to my GC about him lots. I strangely feel closer to him now, maybe it is part of healing.

Technically giving cards out is more showmanship than Facebook posts - cards aren't made out of love and kindness, they're mass produced, disposable and mostly just sent out of obligation and/or posturing.

I also think it's weird to think that it's somehow lesser to give to charity and tell everyone about it. If you really believe in the charity you're giving to, surely you would want to advertise it to try and get them more money?

I'm not happy to receive cards never know what to do with them and there's always a twinge of guilt when I put it straight in the recycling.
Why do people insist on sending cards to someone who's said she doesn't want them?

waves

I am on the board of a Charity and a few years ago we did a banner people could add to their social media profile until the 12th day for a donation, We did't specify the amount. The average donation was £1.10. Yep, all of the generous donors did posts showing off about their banner and applied it. We all found it bizarre!

I know someone who does this because she doesn't like Christmas - few bad experiences that took place on Christmas day, and then a very close death a few days before one year. She now doesn't celebrate Christmas at all, goes away every year, doesn't send or receive cards or gifts. I get the impression the charity donation is a protection for herself so she isn't just seen as a spoil sport/bah hum bug, not as a humble brag.

Yep, that's what I always think. If people say they're donating to charity in lieu of cards, then that's a good thing. Charities need money more than people need another card, generally speaking.

If people DON'T mention the charity bit, then they'd probably be accused of just being tight and lazy, by the same people that accuse them half-wittedly of 'virtue signalling.'

I have done this for colleagues in my office. I don't need or want the challenge of getting cards to teams across the country.

It's also more ESG / climate friendly which is something our business tries to promote.

Secret Santa is a massive no no for me as well - by definition people get crap they don't want usually made from plastic.

So, thinking of the environment mainly.

Especially when your name isn't Jane, and you don't know anyone called Lisa....just adds to the pointlessness, ha ha.

I see nothing wrong with people doing this.

I don't bother sending cards anymore. I will give something to charity, but I don't make social media posts about it. If others do want to announce it though then that doesn't bother me in the slightest and I don't think they are pricks for it. It might even encourage others to give to a good cause when they otherwise might not.

I haven't read the answers but you can do both, send Christmas cards and support a good cause by buying Mouth and Foot painted cards.

www.mfpa.co.uk/

I always assumed it was making sure people knew not to expect a card. Some people keep track of that sort of thing, which doesn’t really compute for those of us who don’t routinely send cards. My MIL would keep track of who did and didn’t send her a card, writing Christmas cards is a big part of her pre Christmas activities. I don’t send cards so I don’t really care, but the message isn’t aimed at someone like me

Good shout. They might think you've died if they don't get one.

I like receiving Xmas cards, I've noticed as people get older they don't bother so much. The younger generation don't either.

I had a friend who used to ask us to give them money for charity in a christmas card instead of a gift (actually give the money to my friend in cash). She said she would donate her money to the charity in question.

Most people were a bit naffed off with the whole thing, especially her own young kids who wanted the gifts!

@Jennybeans401 - how presumptuous of her to assume she would be getting a gift! I would find that very odd. If gift giving between you was normal, then I would have been fine with - if you would like to swap gifts this year I’d be really grateful if you could donate to Morecambe Donkey Sanctuary in lieu of your gift to me. Not give me cash and I will not donate it.

They're just telling you it isn't that they don't like you, they just can't be arsed. I don't really see the issue (and no, I haven't done it).

@Flapjackquack we always exchange gifts but she is chronically tight (but actually wealthy) and always talking about saving money. I don't think the money would have gone to charity.

Middle class virtue signalling. Why not forgo a bottle or two of your expensive Xmas wine instead, and donate the money you’d normally spend on that to charity? Why substitute the thing that might actually bring some people a little bit of pleasure i.e. receiving a card? It’s very easy not to spend money on cards,postage etc - wee bit harder to actually sacrifice one of your own little luxuries.

They might be doing that as well but it would be a bit odd if they added "I'm also giving up wine for December and will add that to the donation."

...and if you consider yourself to be working class?

Exactly.