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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To advocate for DD having a double bed?

248 replies

xhelper · 13/12/2022 15:40

DD is in a cot currently, but will soon be moving into her own bed

I want to give her a double bed, H thinks it's ridiculously OTT?

Now, hear me out on this... I spent ages looking at all the super pretty Little White company fairy bedding sets, and couldn't wait to do all of that

But they don't come in double size and I think she might be more comfy in a double?

Who doesn't want a double over a single bed anyway?

H thinks I'm mad but says 'you do you darling'

Would you give your toddler a double bed? AIBU?

OP posts:
MilkyYay · 13/12/2022 17:56

Just my opinion.

Clearly double beds were invented with the intention of two people sharing!! Lol that people can't work out that double = ×2

Barleysugar86 · 13/12/2022 17:56

My son has a king sized bed! It was already in the room before we had him. It's a massive room though and has these big pull out storage drawers under it so its very useful.

It's great for reading bedtime stories at night. And when he's ill and I'm worried about him we can sleep in there comfortably beside him (he's still young).

The6thQueen · 13/12/2022 18:00

I know that double beds are for two people @MilkyYay , thanks for the hint though 😁.

Why can they only be for two people though? And do you think adults, who live alone, shouldn’t be able to have a double bed - should they only have a single, seeing as it’s just them and all?

coldec · 13/12/2022 18:01

Can you not just put a double duvet on a single bed?

AWaferThinMint · 13/12/2022 18:02

MilkyYay · 13/12/2022 17:56

Just my opinion.

Clearly double beds were invented with the intention of two people sharing!! Lol that people can't work out that double = ×2

By that logic Queen and king beds are only for royalty.

TeamHerbivore · 13/12/2022 18:04

Both my kids went from cots to king size beds. Lots of room for teddies and easier to get in with them if they were ill or had trouble sleeping. My oldest teen now has a superking size though so I may not be the right person to ask. 😂 Bigger beds just seems comfier to me so I’d definitely wouldn’t get a single.

RuthW · 13/12/2022 18:06

Why don't you get a small double? My dd (now adult) as a double won't fit in her room.

BlibBlabBlob · 13/12/2022 18:06

Just a word of warning about the IKEA Hemnes day bed: it's wonderful in many ways but there are drawbacks. There are only three mattresses available that fit it, and none of them are comfortable. We bought the most expensive ones and they are still so, so hard. Bought latex mattress toppers from a specialist company in Italy to make them more comfortable. This worked to some extent but it's still less comfortable than a decent memory foam mattress. And when the bed is in single mode, because the two mattresses (and toppers) are piled on top of each other, the bed is weirdly high and you can't see much of the surrounding bed frame. And finally, as another poster has already noted, if you're going to pull it in and out on a regular basis you have to keep all of the floor space free all of the time. Even then it takes a good few minutes and a bit of swearing to sort it. Overall I wish we hadn't bought the bloody thing, it sounded so good but the reality has been rather different! DD has now decided it is sooooooooooooooo uncomfortable that she can't even sleep in it at all now and keeps landing in my bed instead. Gah.

Flubadubba · 13/12/2022 18:07

Fifiellz · 13/12/2022 16:38

Buy an Ikea Hemnes day bed. Put the gorgeous duvet on it. Pull it out into the double when she is ill/gets older and wants sleepovers.

Mine now have small doubles but we did this option when younger.

This is what we have done.

plipplopplonk · 13/12/2022 18:12

DD is a first year in halls and all of the rooms have double beds. She had one since about 12/13 at home

PurpleButterflyWings · 13/12/2022 18:21

@xhelper

Double bed seems mad for a baby/toddler IMO. Never heard of this before. No child I have ever known/heard of has ever had a double bed either. Seems very odd IMO. I don't know why she would be asking for one in 12-13 years time tbh (as a pp suggested on page 1.). My parents would have looked at me as if I was mad if I had requested a double bed when I was 14-ish, and then laughed at me. And I would have deserved it!

TheNoodlesIncident · 13/12/2022 18:23

How about this @xhelper ? You can have the bedding you really want on it and have the facility to sleep another person to boot. Double beds are fine if you have lots of floor space but if you only need extra capacity now and again, it works well. And you can pick another nice set for the spare...

FirewomanSam · 13/12/2022 18:37

I think it’s a great idea if there’s space!

  1. No need to upgrade to bigger beds as they grow. And sometimes avoids the need for a new bed altogether e.g. if you’re replacing a double bed elsewhere in the home for some reason, you can repurpose the old bed for your toddler. I know a few people who ended up giving their toddlers doubles for that reason - why get rid of a perfectly good double and purchase a brand new single?

  2. Room for parents to sit and read a story or to bunk in with kids when needed.

  3. Child’s room can be a makeshift guest room if needed, assuming they can bunk in with a sibling or sleep with parents for a night or two.

  4. Space for friends to share a bed during sleepovers.

A lot of the knee jerk responses just seem to be ‘omg no, so spoiled’ but if it’s what makes most sense for you and your child then I think it’s silly not to do it just because it seems a bit weird or ‘spoiled’.

Hugasauras · 13/12/2022 18:39

People do get weirdly defensive on MN about double beds for kids as if it's some sort of slight on their own childhood or parenting. It's very odd. If you have the space then go for it. Bigger is always better when it comes to beds IMO!

As a teenager a pal of mine not only had a double but it was a double high sleeper so we could climb up it and sit up high listening to our Walkmans Grin I was so jealous as I only had a single.

name78change · 13/12/2022 18:43

If there's space I don't know why anyone would have an opinion on this. My son has had a king size bed since he was 10, his room is big enough for everything else.

lavenderfine · 13/12/2022 18:48

My 4yo has a small double. He has a large room so still plenty of floor space, it's great for when he's sick and wanting to co-sleep and for cuddling in bed reading stories

Frabbits · 13/12/2022 18:48

PurpleButterflyWings · 13/12/2022 18:21

@xhelper

Double bed seems mad for a baby/toddler IMO. Never heard of this before. No child I have ever known/heard of has ever had a double bed either. Seems very odd IMO. I don't know why she would be asking for one in 12-13 years time tbh (as a pp suggested on page 1.). My parents would have looked at me as if I was mad if I had requested a double bed when I was 14-ish, and then laughed at me. And I would have deserved it!

My kids both have doubles. They have room for them and they like being able to stretch out and there is more room for 2/3 of us to do things like stories or just chat in bed in the morning.

If you have room for them, why not?

Redglitter · 13/12/2022 18:49

Who doesn't want a double over a single bed anyway

I'd say that's true for adults but not so much for a wee just out the cot sized person

itssquidstella · 13/12/2022 18:51

@thecaseofthepurplecushion DH and I also have a king size bed with a double duvet each and I love it! It's definitely spoiled me, though: sometimes when we stay at either of our parents' houses, we sleep in separate rooms because we can't hack the standard double bed and shared duvet 😬

Spiderboy · 13/12/2022 18:54

I would rather the extra floor space for playing. But mostly I’d hate having to change a double bed every time my child was ill. Being able to throw all their bedding including duvet into my machine when they’re ill is a relief.

TokenGinger · 13/12/2022 18:58

We bought DS a single bed, and I've just bought a small double bed for what is currently my office, but will likely become the room I sleep in when baby arrives next month with her crib in there. DS is notorious for getting into our bed which we don't mind, and he likes having one of us lie with him whilst he falls asleep which is tight in a single bed. The plan behind me getting a small double was so that when baby moves into a bed in a year or so's time, DS can have this small double in his room. I wish I'd have just bought him one in the first place. It's so much more comfortable now when getting him to sleep in there (he has taken a shining to it) now compared to his small bed. If you have the space, I'd definitely do it.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 13/12/2022 19:20

It can make for spoiled adults who can't sleep unless starfishing in a huge space.... who then get a shock when their student room only has a single, or their first flat/budget doesn't stretch to a superking and they need to share a double with a partner

This is so funny. I mean...so what? Most young adults aren't so pathetic that they can't get used to it!

I say if you have the room then go for it. I don't think teens (or any person sleeping on their own) 'need' more than a single, but honestly I don't really expend much brain power on how other people sleep. As it happens, when we moved my 13 YO and 11 YO both asked for a double bed and I got frames for less than £50 for both off Gumtree. They love them. Other 13 YO has stayed in his lower bunk.

I remember as a child though I didn't know a single person with a double bed. I was sure it was only for rich American children!

healthadvice123 · 13/12/2022 19:55

@Clymene mine did as they are 6ft ( well had small doubles) ds also has small double in uni room at moment
Also they give up their room for guests so handy if double
When younger and shared didn't both have a double bed then though

OhCrumbsWhereNow · 13/12/2022 19:56

Went for a king-size straight away for DD.

We co-slept and it meant I could sleep in her room with her and get her used to being in own room/bed rather than evicting from ours.

Has been brilliant for sleepovers, visiting relatives, if she was sick/nightmares/stories etc.

Pelo22 · 13/12/2022 19:58

MilkyYay · 13/12/2022 17:43

The people i know who do this share/co-sleep with their child a lot.

I'm not a big fan of giving children double beds. A double bed is for two people.

It can make for spoiled adults who can't sleep unless starfishing in a huge space.... who then get a shock when their student room only has a single, or their first flat/budget doesn't stretch to a superking and they need to share a double with a partner.

Not to mention its totally unecessary, a child is perfectly comfy in a normal single.

That's ridiculous!
I went from a double bed at home (from age 11) to a single that I shared with my boyfriend at uni, and then to a super king size. Which I have all to myself
I'm not having a single bed just because I'm single Confused it would look daft plus I'm not having sex in a single bed age 38