To think you’ve got to be a bit dense to do this?

[WarmBrownEyes]

Show off your new £400 shoes on social media when you’re setting up an online auction to raise funds for your loss of earnings while your child has therapy? Not to mention there’s also an online fundraiser under way currently sitting at five figures.

YANBU thats so much to spend on shoes and if you've got low income to the point of trying to raise money you definitely shouldn't be chucking that kind of money on anything non essential (a £30 treat I wouldn't begrudge but £400 is crazy)

I personally think that it would be petty to withdraw the prize you offered. You have attached a condition to this act. By all means do not give any more money going forward, if that is how you feel.

Yeah, sounds like she's on the grift.

Instead donate your item to a related charity maybe?

I don't think it's petty. OP was donating under the impression the person needed the money for living costs.

If it's actually for keeping her in fancy shoes, then it's not the purpose OP agreed to.

YANBU. She should not be buying £400 shoes while begging for money for loss of earnings.

I’d be annoyed about this too.

It would put me off donating anything else to this person in the future.

If the OP does decide to withdraw the prize offer, then at least be honest about the real reason for doing so, and not go telling stupid made up lies.

Exactly.

Lol, there’s always one.

I’d be bitter in your shoes too! - pun intended!

Totally agree with you OP. Her right hand is asking for handouts to help with their living costs. Her left has just spunked 400 quid on a pair of shoes. Totally tone deaf. Everyone that has donated will think the same as you.

Yes.

At best I would think the person is being disingenuous in setting up the online fundraiser. At worst I would suspect that she had used the funds to buy the shoes...

I'd message and say you're withdrawing as most of the people who donated couldn't afford to do what she did (I'd lay money on it) - and you're one of them.

In £400 shoes.

😂😁

Exactly. It's not being petty - it's merely pointing out that OP has been unwillingly co-opted into non-consensual shoe-buying.

Why I never donate to just giving pages or auctions without knowing everything about the person, ie close friend or family. So many scammers out there. I donate to a charity close to my heart, which I’ve researched and know what percentage of my money goes to the cause itself.

Same

It's a really bad, tone-deaf look.

Are you living in or around the Surrey London border by any chance @WarmBrownEyes if not there is more than one of these tone deaf hands out people.

People are weird. Friends of Dh held a fundraising event to buy their autistic son a therapy dog. They pulled up in their brand new Landrover with a private plate. They got the therapy dog, it's never been used in any way as a therapy dog. They also voted for Brexit prior to selling their house, which had thousands in value added to it by the local authority, ensure, wet room, extra bedroom, to buy a camper to go traveling around Europe. They then decided against this and now rent from a housing association. They were also quite vocal in their support for the EDL.
They are ex friends!

He's said before he's a gay, childless male. Clearly finding it hilarious thinking he's making us women all frothy and angry when in fact all we're doing is rolling our eyes and thinking he's a bit of a twat

It's cheeky but maybe she's not thinking straight if her child is ill.

Withdraw your offer. She can put the shoes up instead.

I don’t know why that person hasn’t been permanently banned.

well, very dense as in I can't see many people being over generous with donations when they've just read the person requesting themselves to a £400 pair of shoes.
In your situation I'd be a bit pissed off and distance myself from the go fund me stuff going forward - and probably reconsider the friendship as I wouldn't feel comfortable with her moral/ethical stance.