Nativity disappointment why do teachers do it

[Bucketheadbucketbum]

Want to key stage 2 nativity today. It was 1 hour long! Approx 40 kids in it. Some children had multiple lines throughout the hour, on the stage for the bulk of the time, solo songs the works. Others had just one line and spent the rest of the time sitting to the side apart from group songs where they all stood up. I understand all parts cant be equal and it must be a nightmare to try and be fair but this was shockingly poorly distrubuted. Why would you do this as a teacher? So disappointing for the children and parents unless you happen to be one of the "stars" of the show.

My son is 10 and autistic, he is quite quiet and certainly not in the ‘popular’ group, every year he had a none speaking part, sheep, star, donkey etc.

last year, for the first time they held auditions for the school play (not nativity) he was desperate for a main part and practiced so hard - he was given 1 line.
The popular kids as usual got the main parts - again.

On the day of the performance the boy with main speaking part was off sick - teacher asks the class if anyone knew his lines - only my son put his hand up - told her he knew everyone’s lines.

He absolutely smashed it and I was so proud of him up on that stage The teacher and his ta spoke to me after, they were gobsmacked with him, they even said he was really good in his audition but they didn’t think he’d cope.

Quiet/quirky kids do often get overlooked - every year! if they want to take part they should be given a chance rather than the ones always chosen as standard.

Mumsnet is actually turning into a crazy space full of loons.

So many bonkers threads and responses recently. So many entitled, self centred people who cannot see past their own opinions

DNephew was the narrator and shepherd in his nativity play. His two best friends had starring roles and one was great but the second was a king and he froze on seeing his parent and wanted to go to him! They’re only 4 or 4.5 so no wonder they get stage fright. One little girl was a real diva and danced away but not all kids are like that!

This is AWESOME

I think if any of us who trained as teachers (especially with drama as a specialism, like I did) currently have our eyes so rolled back into our heads at some of these comments from parents that we are mostly typing out replies using touch alone.

I get it. In a totally perfect classroom, every child will have an identically large speaking/singing/dancing role. Every child will sing and smile and laugh in all the right places. All parents would be appeased at this communist ideal where everyone is treated equally & all parents will fawn & clap at the beautiful ensemble piece rendered before them.

Unfortunately, living back in the real world, this isn’t, and can never be the case. You have to chose kids based on their abilities. Some will be stronger singers in the chorus, others have the confidence to be a narrator or lead character. Some will want to do all the fun backstage stuff (even if, as in the old days, that was just turning the CD player on & off at the right time). Others will throw themselves into helping make props or painting sheep for the bit with the shepherds. If you know your class well (and most of us do for reasons well outside the remit of bloody nativity casting) you know the rough plan of who will play what. You may have auditions, or ask the kids themselves who might be good in a part. You could workshop the whole shebang for a week before casting & the old regulars may still get the ‘premium’ roles, because that’s where their strengths lie.

Teachers will know who will work best in an ensemble chorus. They know the kids that will have the support to practice a larger role. They know who would be absolutely terrified if they were made to stand in front of hundreds of people and, if I’m honest, wet themselves in fright.

And, unfortunate as it seems, the ones with the confident PTA parents will often take the confident, larger roles not through favouritism, but because those confident people have confident children. There may be exceptions to this rule of course (and good teachers will be adept at encouraging those who have potential to excel in performing regardless of who their parent or what their background is) but it is a simple observation.

A good teacher will know which kid will make a fabulous comedy donkey, a clear speaking Angel Gabriel or a strong but silent Wise Man.

Even as a drama specialist, you know you can’t do right for doing bloody wrong. There will always be the pushy parent who’ll insist their nose picking progeny is the next Laurence Olivier. But there will also always be that one spark in a child that doesn’t have the support or money or ideal home life that you can nurture & develop, even in a school nativity, which could help that child in so many more ways than I could write here.

That’s why we do that same, thankless task, year in, year out.

You are brilliant. This is full of wisdom, wit and common sense. Thank you

There are only a few main parts in a Nativity. Obviously most of the children will just make up the choir. What do you suggest teachers do? Make up parts? Have tallking sheep?

Cracking. So you’ll be volunteering to organise it next year then.

This post brings back the memories of my lot at Primary School. Agree that some children don't want to be centre of attention but it was very coincidental that the ones who generally got big parts had parents on PTA , governors or parents good mates with the teachers!!
Am so glad not to go through all this ever again .My children can still remember but actually now laugh about it!

@GuyFawkesDay Thanks, but I talk mostly bollocks lol (fab name btw, but I’m biased as I was born on 5th Nov; in with a bang, out with a bang 😂).

I always found the children who enjoyed it the most seemed to be those in the chorus who got to wear various hats they'd made for various group songs!
That sounds like my experience. Then I went to secondary school and enjoyed being on the tech team, stage crew and in ensemble parts.
It was good fun, not stressful and I made new friends, plus didn't have to stay back after school several nights a week so I could do my other hobbies too.

I feel sorry for primary teachers at this time of year because whatever they do some precious parent will be moaning about it.

There might be a lesson to be learnt in disappointment but there's also one about believing in kids who might not believe in themselves and encouragement not just picking the easy option

It's the precious parents who get catered too generally because the poor teacher will have to put up with the moaning if not

Maybe the ones who got the starring roles last year and the year before and the year before don't get the starring role this year? We aren't talking about a Hollywood blockbuster and as @KickboxingWanker's post shows sometimes the kids who are written off would be brilliant if only they were given a chance.

Out of my class of 29, 12 volunteered for speaking roles and all were given one. I was extremely surprised by who volunteered and who didn't. Some of my seemingly more outgoing ones were adamant they didn't want a speaking role.

And, unfortunate as it seems, the ones with the confident PTA parents will often take the confident, larger roles not through favouritism, but because those confident people have confident children

This is often trotted out but total bollocks. It's not an x factor audition to get on the PTA ,.it's normally people who have the time (ie aren't working full time /juggling multiple children)

JackieDaws, entitled to a 'starring role' 🤣, crikey the OP is highlighting the lack of talking roles amongst infants, not auditions for a Christmas Carol at The Old Vic!

@CentrifugalBumblePuppy as a key stage 1 teacher, actually completely disagree with you. Am on a very different page when it comes to nativity performances and what I want the children to get out of them.

There are a lot of funny articles online about what your part in the nativity means for your future career / life prospects 😂

I had a parent message me today telling me their DS would be an excellent Joseph and please could I consider him for this years nativity, because his friend was Joseph a few years ago and poor DS has never been Joseph. 😵‍💫

WTAF! Just no!

1. I’m not selecting parts for this years Christmas concert
2. I have nothing to do with this years concert 🙏 The fall out from last years concert will last me a lifetime
3. if I were I would not choose your DS to be Joseph
4. Class 5 don’t perform “The Nativity”. And never have
5. HTF did you get my mb phone number?? I’m not happy! You will soon feel my wrath!! I know who you are! 🤬

Agree! Also agree that teachers, no matter what they do, will ever please everyone! In most schools, there will be at least one performance of sorts every year. They can’t all always have big parts.

Yanbu though. At drama / theatre clubs all children usually get the opportunity to have at least one line in their own little plays. It’s not really acceptable for teachers just to ignore all the quiet kids / those that might need a push. I think kids in state schools are so often lacking in confidence because the opportunities for public speaking aren’t available to them. There’s always some reason the teachers can’t facilitate this….they are too busy, the kids don’t want to, they’re shy etc but they’re just letting the kids down with this attitude imo.

But it is self-sustaining. Stars in reception are bound to have more confidence in y1 and then even more so in y2 etc. And teachers will feel more confident working with ones they know have done well in the past.

it is all very well saying some kids don’t want lines but a lot who don’t get them do want lines. They should be given a chance. It also shouldn’t matter how good an actor they are - so what if they are rubbish? It is not the globe and learning confidence to stand up in front of people is huge. Our primary was like this - same six kids (5 were teachers‘ children). No children with SEN on stage. I saw a Christmas show at a different School. That one wasn’t as ‘polished’ but all the children got to go on stage in small or large groups. The children from the integrated Unit were paired with another child and they went up on stage together so that child spoke a line with a prompter beside them or the support child said it for them but they were still on stage. It was soo much better (though they made a hash of ticketing and there was a bit of chaos around that).

Uninclusive? What?
Teacher told me that many many of the children in ds2's year were very shy, didn't want a speaking part, or any part really. And barely sang, quietly, because they were all do meek. Ds2 never had main or huge parts, but had a fee central roles. And had a loud singing voice, and he carried them. I was kind of ashamed, my friends thought he was fab. Teacher told me he absolutely saved her and without him they would've been scuppered (barely heard).

Which bit of 'not all kids want to be stars, do you not get OP?

Hate school nativity. They used to do one for each year group, now it’s the whole of each key stage. There are 4 year groups on stage for my son’s event (years 3,4,5 and 6). It’s a crowded mess.

Its all the same kids getting the same parts with everyone else sitting around looking bored until the 2 carols at the end. Same year after year.

My son just gets fed up and upset he’s never given anything to do. He doesn’t want to be the star of the show or anything but he would like to do something, anything.