Nativity disappointment why do teachers do it

[Bucketheadbucketbum]

Want to key stage 2 nativity today. It was 1 hour long! Approx 40 kids in it. Some children had multiple lines throughout the hour, on the stage for the bulk of the time, solo songs the works. Others had just one line and spent the rest of the time sitting to the side apart from group songs where they all stood up. I understand all parts cant be equal and it must be a nightmare to try and be fair but this was shockingly poorly distrubuted. Why would you do this as a teacher? So disappointing for the children and parents unless you happen to be one of the "stars" of the show.

Yes, that is because loads of posters are teachers on Mumsnet and the thread title makes it pretty clear it is about school. No, I wouldn't imagine many Data Protection people will be attracted to a thread about school Nativity and that's more the issue you have with me than actually agreeing with the OP as your very personal and offensive posts demonstrate.

I think you'll find I started responding to you in mind when you belittled my and other teachers experience.
Don't dish it out if you can't take it.

Sorry, where did I belittle your experiences, I did no such thing, I wrote about the need for flexibility and the challenges in other jobs it is not just the domain of teachers. You don't seem to like the idea of feedback, and got very personal and offensive. I don't work on the premise of dishing out attacks on people I have never met as I am a rationalist.

Well I had a fairly long career as a senior teacher/deputy/ senco/ head and actually trained my daughters reception teacher (also wrote their reference and gave them a lift to their initial interview).

My daughters part in the Christmas play was 'a dirty Christmas bauble'. She appeared on stage, was rejected and put in a box where she sat for the rest of the play.
She was very shy and thrilled not to have to look at anyone and her teacher was relieved that she could allocate the part without a parent complaint.

Future parts included: a camel, a tree and a present.

For goodness sake @Goldenbear and@YouScumbagYouMaggotHeresKevinTheCarrot give us all a break. This is a really tedious threadjack that your inflicting on everyone.

No worries, I will let you all get back to your teacher bashing.

I do understand it is difficult when your child has a tiny part. My DD's generally were picked to sing solos by junior school because they were choristers, dd1 was a real diva too. I know it's a bit lazy if the teachers when each year she got the big number but the reality is they handed her the score and she sing the song, they didn't need to teach it line by line, I get why. Oddly she refuses to put herself forward these days, she's semi pro but rubbish at marketing herself

Actually I'm a teacher (though recently retired). If you read my posts I've been defending teachers.

A prime example of how not to do it.

The favoured kids get more and more confident, and others just as good get their confidence knocked back and are demoralised year after year.

I long ago came to the conclusion that some teachers know sod all about child psychology.

I long ago came to the conclusion that some teachers know sod all about child psychology.

Is it worse that you experts bow out? I'd call that a shameful abdication of your responsibilities. Imagine the difference someone like you could make. And yet, you don't. It's a disgrace.

So many excellent teachers clearly going to waste on this thread. If only some of them would train, get qualified and fill the gaps left by those who've been ground down by those parents who do nothing but criticise them.

They don't need to train; training is for the losers who are already doing it wrong.

No need for the snark. This is not about being a teacher. It is about understanding how important this is to a child and allocating roles fairly. Some schools do this, some do not.

Or do you think all the PE teachers who used to get kids to choose team members leaving the same kids to the end every time were also right because they were trained teachers?

Things that some teachers see as minor can really impact on children. Like the teacher on this thread who said all young kids are thrilled to get a part and don't notice who has a bigger part. They are wrong. I know. I did not care what parts my DD got, she noticed and cared a lot and got upset about it from a young age.

Just been to a bloody brilliant school Christmas play, reception and year 1. Every child had their moment at front of stage, some in twos or threes, some in a group of five, maybe one line each, maybe singing a verse with the rest of the children joining in the chorus. Not one child had more than a couple of lines, not one child left sitting at the side all through it. One or two fluffed a line, some seemed to be confused about going right or left, a couple missed their cue and it would never have won an Oscar but the kids and parents were so happy, everyone congratulating each other's kids at the end.

It was absolutely lovely. I made a point of congratulating the class teachers and the head of KS1 on what a fantastic job they had done.

The whole point is some children do get disappointed that once again they are sitting at the side of the stage watching others. Schools vary, some do a fantastic job of making every child feel included, others don't. Maybe you haven't experienced the second but it can be very hard, particularly when kids have gone through it from reception to year 6.

My concern often was less to do with my child not getting a part and more to do with their boredom year and year of having to sit in the gym hall day after day for rehearsals for a play which they basically aren’t any part in. They used to complain how boring that was. I suppose there maybe is some benefit in them learning sometimes not everything is about them. But there really was very little educating them happened in December

Quiet middle-of-the-road kids learn every day in school that nothing is about them. I am bitter yes.

That's how it should be done. No superstars. No sidelined children.

If she was really that upset that’s when you (her parent) should have stepped in.

Absolutely. It was so lovely to see them all. The whole atmosphere was brilliant and I just felt it showed what a supportive and caring environment that school is. That's why I made a point of finding some of the staff to say how good it was and what a brilliant job they'd done.

Contrast with my older GCs school when he was in primary. He had a leading if not the leading role in every play for 7 years, one at Christmas and one in the summer. Class assembly he was always a reader and then some kids never got a look in there were two girls in his class who were the same. I was proud of him but to be honest in the end I felt embarrassed.

Wait until year 6 and you realise it’s the same 3/4 children being given the parts every fucking year.
DD would have liked a part, is very well behaved, had 100% attendance, spoke very nicely and clearly. So she was in the ‘choir’ for 5 years.
Year 5/6 the show is actually at night. Year 6 I didn’t send her. I was sick of going, seeing the same kids, never even seeing her face.

We had alternative plans and i chose them over it. Teacher had a go at DD and I left a message that I would be happy to explain why she wasn’t going and if he wanted to complain to do it to me not to a child.

Nursery teacher was great and arranged it so at least you saw your child, everyone was on stage for at least a minute. There’s a point if you want parents to support things you have to give them what they want, which is to see their child at least when you’ve begged work to be there.

Same at our school. It became a running joke. " Ooh let's guess who will get the main parts thus year.....". Always the same one's. My daughter auditioned every year. She was lucky if she got one line. She desperately wanted a good part in her year 6 leavers play. She had to audition in front of the whole class,which was a big thing for her...and she got one line. I understand that many kids are happy with that, but when there are others who desperately want to be given a chance and don't get it, then it's annoying

This sounds absolutely lovely and was what I had expected. It was just really eye opening to see they had decided to do a show that had parts which were either stars or very obviously rejected fillers

Makes Mr nervous about the whole ethos of the place

Next time say your kid doesn’t want a big part then, and let one of the other kids have a go. Job done!

With dd1 she'd had a number of big parts (3/4 of the junior Christmas shows, not the main, but a good part each time, and the majority of her year hadn't even had a part, just were choir each time) and so when it came to the year 6 play, we talked about it, and went in together and requested she didn't have a big part because she'd more than had her turn.

They gave her the main part and said if she wouldn't do it, she wouldn't be in the play. She was good, she was reliable, but I'm sure there were several others who would have done as well. I didn't really get their reasoning.

I proposed to the school (juniors) that they should make sure that each Christmas play had enough parts for 1/4 of the year (150 children total, so around 40 parts) to have some sort of part with at least one line. Then there should be a list and each child ticked off as they have a part, so every child should have had a part for one show. Then the year 6 play done by audition. I thought that was fair.
They didn't take my suggestion.
I thought it was both sensible and practical. It wouldn't have taken too much to have a list they ticked off every year. And it would have encouraged them to change from having one shepherd with 20 lines to having 10 with 2, for example which, when you have 150 kids for parts, is far better.

I think every child should be able to go home and say "my part is XXX". What they had was normally about 10 children with big parts and 15 with little, and 120 who were "choir" wearing, on a good year, a Christmas hat with school uniform.