To expect no-outdoor-shoe households to provide slippers?

[pairofrollerskates]

Just that - slides, or foot covers of some kind. Of course, if you know in advance it's different, but when you turn up for the first time at someone's house to be told "please take off outdoor shoes" at the door (which is reasonable, we all get to decide what happens in our own homes), surely something should be provided rather than expect visitors to pad about in bare feet, or socks.

I thought both Harry and Meghan lived there?

Do you really never wear sandals ever? Even on hot days?

In the US, you just ask what the homeowner would want you to do.

Many houses in the US don’t have carpets at all even more so in warmer and/or rural areas where it is likely to be wood because it is easier to clean. If you do have carpet, there are runners that could be put on over the top so people could walk or wheel through the carpeted room to a non-carpet floor without having to remove your shoes. To remove shoes (to some Americans) is getting too comfortable and intending to stay for a long period of time. It would be considered illogical to take off your shoes and put them back on if you’re only visiting for a short time.

To be honest I only occasionally wear sandals and if I'm going to someone's house I wear footwear that I wear socks/tights with or I take a pair of socks in my bag. But no I don't wear sandals as my right ankle is extremely unstable from a past injury so I need to wear supportive footwear. Still though, I'd rather go barefoot in someone's house than walk all the outdoor stuff through their carpets.

If you're wearing sandals your feet are out anyway. So why is so terrible to just take them off?

I am not saying there is anything wrong with being barefoot on clean floors. I thought it was being implied that it was wrong to be barefoot in someone's house. It is perfectly normal to wear sandals in summer.

IIRC It was when she first met Catherine, so she was quite a new girlfriend, maybe she did live there. I doubt she had her name on the tenancy agreement.

Just checked, yes it was Meghan's home too.

@FayCarew you know both Harry and Meghan and William and Kate lived together before marrying?
Meghan and Harry began dating July 2016. Meghan met Kate and William in January 2017.

I think at that point, she'd been seeing H for about 4 months. Pretty quick to have a flat in KP as your home.

Just to breakdown what seems to have become a very yes-or-no argument.

If I go to a 'shoes-off' house, I take my shoes off. I mean, I'd rather not, but if that's what the host wants...

Mine is a 'shoes-on' house. If someone comes here and they want to take off their shoes, sure - but they don't have to do that.

If someone were to come to my house and want to take their shoes off, I would never say, "Sorry - this is a shoes-on house. If you don't want to follow our rules, then you can't come in. Bye."

But a lot of shoes-off people on the thread have said that that's precisely what they'd do. That's the bit I don't get. It doesn't matter what your justification is for wanting them to take their shoes off, just as it doesn't matter what theirs is for wanting to keep them on. You don't have that debate on the doorstep.

I think the friendly and hostly thing to do, if someone's reluctant to take their shoes off, is to say, "Hey - no. It's not that big a deal. Just wipe your feet - it's fine."

As opposed to, "Fuck off then. Martin, we only need seven places at the table."

@WalkingOnTheCracks

If someone were to come to my house and want to take their shoes off, I would never say, "Sorry - this is a shoes-on house. If you don't want to follow our rules, then you can't come in. Bye."

What a nonsensical comment. They're not going to dirty your carpet by walking around with their shoes off, but someone walking into a house with shoes on is highly likely to leave dirt, marks, germs, etc.

As opposed to, "Fuck off then. Martin, we only need seven places at the table."

Yes, that's exactly what people say...

Okay. Those people who say here that they wouldn't let people in - what do they say to those people?

My point is, you wouldn't have that argument on the doorstep with someone who'd prefer not to take off their shoes. Or would you?

WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL MY BABY?

I've never had to say anything. They see the shoe stack by the door, they see me take my shoes off, they take off theirs. Occasionally someone asks if I want then to take their shoes off, I reply, "If that's all right, you're welcome to the slippers if you want" and they say "Sure, no problem" and all is well.

I do have a friend who uses a wheelchair so yes, I just deal with that. I don't tip her out and roll her across the floor. If you can't remove your shoes for some health reason then that's OK. We're just people who prefer not to track dirt through the house where reasonably possible. We're not complete fanatics.

If you prefer me to keep my shoes on in your house, then I will.

Doesn't really answer the question, and perhaps you're not the person to answer it, as I don't remember whether you said that you would refuse entry to someone who didn't want to take their shoes off.

But a few people here have said exactly that. And I'm interested to know how they'd do it.

I've never had anyone refuse or show they weren't willing! Do people without shoe-related health issues make a scene at the door about it?

Again, that's not the point.

People have said that they wouldn't let visitors in. Which means they've considered that possibility and come up with a way of dealing with it.

The question is - to anyone who's been explicit about that - what would you actually do then?

Well I probably shouldn't answer since I'm not sure it's aimed at me...but I suppose it would depend on who they were, why they were there and why they didn't want to remove their shoes. If it was a friend with an ankle issue who needed supportive shoes, no problem. If it's the police and I had better do as I'm told, then come on in, officer. If it was some colossal twat who started telling me that it meant I wasn't middle class enough, I'd probably tell them to fuck off purely for the insult of assuming I gave a shit.

Okay, it's a new neighbour, you've invited round for drinks.

"I'd really rather not, if it's all the same to you. Just....I'd rather keep my shoes on..."

I'll worry about it when it happens. It never has yet.

I suppose I'd let it go, but unless they were really sparkling company, I probably wouldn't invite them again.

I'll worry about it when it happens.

Indeed. But some here have apparently thought it through ahead of time, and I hope they respond.

I suppose I'd let it go, but unless they were really sparkling company, I probably wouldn't invite them again.

That's the worth knowing. Your ranking of priorities is...

1. Sparkling guests.
2. Carpet
3. Unexceptional guests.

What if it were a shoes-on couple and one was sparkling and and the other unexceptional?

Actually, more interestingly, what if one was shoes-off unexceptional and the other was shoes-on sparkling?

See, it's all very complex. This is probably why some shoes-off people have put time and effort into thinking it through before it actually happens.