To expect no-outdoor-shoe households to provide slippers?

[pairofrollerskates]

Just that - slides, or foot covers of some kind. Of course, if you know in advance it's different, but when you turn up for the first time at someone's house to be told "please take off outdoor shoes" at the door (which is reasonable, we all get to decide what happens in our own homes), surely something should be provided rather than expect visitors to pad about in bare feet, or socks.

Again this is terrible hosting. Making your guests feel uncomfortable. For many your shoes are an integral part of the party outfit. Take them off and you feel underdressed or uncomfortable. And yes conscious of your feet.

I’ve never been to a party where I had to take shoes off.

Remember the SITC episode where Carrie’s Manolas were stolen? It was presented then as the host being rude/precious asking all the party goers to take off their lovely shoes.

YABU
I have carpets and don't want marks...besides, think about everything you're tracking in.
Offering slippers is weird.

I imagine it's generational in part. I've never assumed I can keep my shoes on in anyone's home. I've also never had anyone refuse to take their shoes off in my home. If anyone did they wouldn't be invited back. No guest is so special that they trump basic cleanliness. What's rude is not respecting the home you are visiting.

Yes but the point is - polite people will offer. But it is rude to ask. And I’m sure if you demanded they take their shoes off and they felt uncomfortable they would be quite happy not to return to your home.

Why is it rude to ask?

It’s bad manners. You are making your guests feel uncomfortable. I understand that many on here don’t understand that.

Most people offer so it shouldn’t be an issue. It’s not something I’ve ever encountered. But like I said - I offer/take them off where there are carpets. Friends with wooden/stone floors say ‘keep them on’ and I say the same.

Why do people think that people who’ll take shoes off (and ask others to take their shoes off) to protect their carpets will also have manky slippers? Surely if you’re a clean carpet ponce you’ll also be a slipper-washer?

(To be clear I’m neither, I’m a “kick the dirt into the gaps between the floorboards” person, but also take my shoes off at home because socked feet are more comfortable.)

I once arrived at a friends, straight from work with my bare feet in ballerina shoes, when she said shoes off please I couldn't go in, honestly my feet were much much worse than my shoes! However, if I am aware of someone with a no shoes policy I always ensure I'm wearing something with socks.

@delatron,I had someone wearing hiking boots trample mud over my house - they went in every room. Same person insists on shoes of at their house. They aren't allowed in my house at all now.

Why would it be bad manners? It's my house. I've a small house and small children, it would get so disgusting with shoes inside. I have no issue telling people to take shoes off.

Yes in that situation they should have offered to take them off and you would have been grateful. Muddy hiking boots are a different situation. And traipsing around someone’s house is rude. Most polite people would offer to take muddy hiking boots off.

I think it’s those that stand at the door and announce they are a ‘shoes off household’ are rude. Give people a chance to offer. If they don’t offer then there may be a reason they don’t want to take their shoes off and most people wouldn’t traipse heavy mud in. A wipe on the doormat should be ok.

It doesn't work to say 'there are culture where that's good manners, so that justifies it in our culture'.

In some cultures it's good manners to belch after a meal - it expresses gratitude and satisfaction. So will you be doing that, as you sit shoeless round the table at the neighbourhood dinner party?

But slippers come in different sizes! So, not practical and someone walking about in the wrong sized slippers could end up doing an unexpected cartwheel.

Socks - that's the answer.

It doesn't work to say 'there are culture where that's good manners, so that justifies it in our culture'.

Except that it's good manners in any culture to respect your host environment. It's the agreement you make when you accept the invitation to enter. At any rate, people from shoes off cultures are part of ours (shoes off might even be the norm in the UK these days), so the question remains: if you visit a Muslim household, are they being bad mannered to ask you to remove your shoes? Or are you being bad mannered to think you can enter their home with shoes on?

I can't belch on demand so I probably wouldn't do it, but if I accepted an invitation to dinner in such a culture, I'd just brace myself. Don't really see how it's equivalent to not treading dirt around...

Mine are quite a clever elasticated design so they can accommodate several sizes. The large ones are way too big for me but I could wear them if I had to.

On the strength of this thread, though, I think I'll get some thick, grippy, slipper socks to add to the collection. Nothing wrong with extra choice. And yes, they'll get washed between guests like everything else.

I have a friend who has a no shoes rule. Well former friend. I don’t enter a no shoes household full stop. I sometimes have dropped her DC off to her bu stay on the doorstep. The whole no shoes rule is unreasonable. YANBU

And this is why I steal hotel slippers!

My job involves home visits in the community. I always keep socks in my bag for occasions where I’m asked to take my shoes off, just in case I’m not wearing socks that day. I’d rather pad about in my socks than be given communal shoes to wear!

Shoes in the house are gross. We are rural so shoes would nearly always be muddy, even so we have all hard floors downstairs. Generally think carpets are pretty unsanitary.

Anyway, no - everyone who visits knows they are coming somewhere rural, shoes or wellies off outside the front door.

I expect all visitors to remove shoes, (i live rurally) no pavements on the lane i live on. I think its extremely rude to walk into some ones house in their outdoor footwear, you could of walked in dog mess or anything you cant see whats under all these fallen leaves at the moment.
If they dont no entry, but i do have some shoe covers which i offer.
No one has ever refused, workmen do it automatically.
When i go visiting i take slippers with me in my handbag.

YABU. I have a pair of slippers that I keep here for my MIL because she finds it very uncomfortable not to wear shoes due to a problem with her feet but I don’t think people want to share them?! Also what’s wrong with wearing socks?

Shoes in the house is all kinds of wrong imo

I have a no shoes upstairs rule … because it’s carpeted. When I did have a no outdoor shoe rule - I lived in a townhouse - I had a box of shoe covers for those who didn’t want to and workmen etc …

I have never been offered slippers when I've visited a no show household. It doesn't bother me at all to just wear my socks (if it did, I'd take slippers with me). I never ask guests (thankfully don't have many!) to remove shoes either. We have no carpets though so I would ask if we did have

Ewww who would want to wear someone else’s slippers? This has to be a joke surely?

Agree with this totally.