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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate bloody Christmas cards?

214 replies

HandbagsnGladrags · 04/12/2022 13:41

I'm not a Christmas Grinch - I like Christmas. But AIBU to think that Christmas cards are a total waste of time and money? I fucking hate them. I wish no one would send them to me. They end up cluttering up the windowsills and making the house look untidy. I don't send any except to my bloody mother who makes a right fuss if I don't send her one. She also comments on my lack of card sending to others. Fuck off.

Is anyone with me?

OP posts:
FuzzyPuffling · 04/12/2022 16:04

Well I bloody love them!

For most of the year, stuff in the post is usually marketing shizz or impersonal missives from the water company etc, so a card written especially for me from someone I care about is brilliant.

I've written mine this afternoon.

Oxterguff · 04/12/2022 16:05

I can’t stand cards. I post on FB to say that I’m giving card money to charity (I actually do donate) to stop people wasting time and money sending them to us. The only people I send them to are my parents and elderly relatives. Most people I know are the same these days.

whoseafraidofnaomiwolf · 04/12/2022 16:06

Love a Christmas card. Just lovely. A lot of my family and friends live away from me so I don't get to see them often - once a year usually so A CC is just a nice way for me to send love to them and wishes for a joyful Christmas season. The last 20 years Ive included a 'family update not with them too' as we've had children and they've grown. I definitely send fewer than I used to though.

I really can't BEAR those cards with a photo of the senders children on the front though - it just seems so... I dunno... self promoting and arrogant somehow? I am aware that this is my own personal hangup though and would never mention it in RL!

RedHelenB · 04/12/2022 16:09

Cornelious · 04/12/2022 15:36

I hate them too. Don't like sending or receiving. I'll only get one for my dh and dc.

Whats the point in that, when you see them every day?

darjeelingrose · 04/12/2022 16:12

NoNamesLeft234678 · 04/12/2022 14:08

I've written loads this morning to family, friends and baby class teachers so hopefully they don't feel the same as you 🙈 My cards are keepsakes though as they have pictures of my little one on 🥰

I do like Christmas cards, but do you mean that you think people will keep a card because it's got a photo of your baby on? I have never done this, although I have had loads over the year. I didn't think anybody would expect me to keep them.😳

BigglyBee · 04/12/2022 16:13

I'm not fond of greetings cards in general and rarely send them. Usually, I only send Mass cards or (if the family is not Catholic) sympathy cards. I call relatives at Christmas and send presents for birthdays and that works fine for my family.

Christmas cards wind me up much more for some reason. I think it's because I used to know a lot of people who were quite competitive about who got the most. I was also annoyed by it always being me who was expected to buy, write and post the cards. One year, I told Mr Bee that if he wanted cards to be sent, he would have to send them. He never did, and so no cards have been sent for 25 years. Nobody was horribly offended, in fact nobody ever mentioned it as far as I'm aware.

DillDanding · 04/12/2022 16:16

My husband gives me a card. He loves to write something appreciative and romantic. Usually makes me cry. He also does it on gift tags.

Even though I hate cards, and never display them, I like his and keep them all in a box. Yes, our kids will rightly bin them all when we’re dead, but I like to read them when I’m feeling schmaltzy.

Laiste · 04/12/2022 16:18

I don't think posties are allowed to take back tonnes of junk mail not delivered. RM is paid to deliver it. If yours obliges, maybe they just dump it in a bin that you don't see?

Yes, we still get junk mail via the postie, but my notice was to cut down the amount of flyers being delivered individually. Estate agent's flyers, local takeaway companies, MLM catalogues ect. We seem to get less of those now.

Yes they probably do just chuck the excess in the bin. But i can't do more than refuse to accept it through the door personally on principal.

If everybody did it perhaps the practice of delivering individual ad mail might die out.

TeenDivided · 04/12/2022 16:20

I love Christmas cards and they form part of our decorations, hanging on holders from wall lights or pictures. It makes me really sad to think people just chuck them in a bin.

Laiste · 04/12/2022 16:20

And i keep meaning to say - Yes i remember those silky cushiony cards!! I'd forgotten all about them. In a box. God that's a blast from the past.

My old nan was a big fan. I think i got one from her when i was 18.

chocolateasaltyballs22 · 04/12/2022 16:21

Laiste · 04/12/2022 16:18

I don't think posties are allowed to take back tonnes of junk mail not delivered. RM is paid to deliver it. If yours obliges, maybe they just dump it in a bin that you don't see?

Yes, we still get junk mail via the postie, but my notice was to cut down the amount of flyers being delivered individually. Estate agent's flyers, local takeaway companies, MLM catalogues ect. We seem to get less of those now.

Yes they probably do just chuck the excess in the bin. But i can't do more than refuse to accept it through the door personally on principal.

If everybody did it perhaps the practice of delivering individual ad mail might die out.

If I'm sat in the garden in the summer and someone comes in delivering flyers I tell them to turn around and not deliver to me. They're never happy.

Laiste · 04/12/2022 16:22

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/254186672336

Look you can get vintage padded cards on ebay! wow.

Mittens1717 · 04/12/2022 16:24

XmasElfontheShelf · 04/12/2022 14:25

If you find other ways to see your friends or talk to them @HandbagsnGladrags , great.

I send and l love getting them. I'm in my 60s and send to friends I was at school with and who were special friends at the time. We've not see each other for decades as we live a long way apart - other ends of the country- but it's a way of saying 'Hi, hope you are okay' and keeping the memories alive.

We aren't close enough any more for chats or whatever, but it's a once a year way of keeping in touch and sometimes swapping a few lines of family news.

My mum is 96 and gets around 90 cards, some sent from women she knew when they were 7 years old. I think it's really sweet.

That's really lovely ❤

RoachPussy · 04/12/2022 16:24

Because of my right hand having a tremor I can’t physically write cards anymore. I look back over the year and pick a handful of photos of the family and the dogs, go online, add a message and order photo cards. I don’t know about everyone liking them or not but I usually get a handful of thank you messages for the cards. One of my friends has kept every one that I have sent over the last 5 years which I thought was lovely. If they’re used to light a fire, happy to have been useful. I only send about 40 to those who are important to our family just to let them know that we’re thinking of them and to wish them a merry Christmas and all the best for the coming year. Love receiving cards too especially if there’s a round Robin.

NoNamesLeft234678 · 04/12/2022 16:27

Biker47 · 04/12/2022 14:19

Those are the worst types of cards to receive.

Show quote history

I've asked friends if they want them before writing them and even the one who doesn't like cards does and have kept the footprint ones from last year 🤷‍♀️ A lot of the baby class teachers have a place to stick cards up on the wall too and last time I gave one to his gymnastics teacher she loved it and was showing it to everyone so we must just know different types of people 🤷‍♀️

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2022 16:29

Some people are really sad if they can’t cope with a few cards decorating their home, and to be so anal about what decorations they have up. Bet you are the people who rearrange the Christmas tree once your DC are in bed after they have decorated the tree.

Do you throw the cards that your DC make at nursery/school straight into the recycling bin?

Laiste · 04/12/2022 16:29

@chocolateasaltyballs22 this summer i came out of the house and bumped into a bloke coming up to deliver a flyer for a conservatory company.

I said oh, don't bother please, thanks.
He said here you are i'm half way up (the short slope) now.
I said no, really it'll just go in the bin ...
He said oh come on just take it love.
I - incredulous that i was having to argue about this - said we've already got a conservatory and we hate the bloody thing and will be knocking it down asap !
He said GOOD GOD in a big loud voice and stropped off back down the slope 😂
All that over a blinking flyer! But it was the principal of it 😂I would have defended my letter box with my life at that point!

NoNamesLeft234678 · 04/12/2022 16:30

darjeelingrose · 04/12/2022 16:12

I do like Christmas cards, but do you mean that you think people will keep a card because it's got a photo of your baby on? I have never done this, although I have had loads over the year. I didn't think anybody would expect me to keep them.😳

Show quote history

I've asked friends if they want them before writing them and even the one who doesn't like cards does and have kept the footprint ones from last year 🤷‍♀️ I don't expect them to be kept but know that they will be by at least 2 friends and grandparents. I keep all cards too 🤷‍♀️

chocolateasaltyballs22 · 04/12/2022 16:31

Laiste · 04/12/2022 16:29

@chocolateasaltyballs22 this summer i came out of the house and bumped into a bloke coming up to deliver a flyer for a conservatory company.

I said oh, don't bother please, thanks.
He said here you are i'm half way up (the short slope) now.
I said no, really it'll just go in the bin ...
He said oh come on just take it love.
I - incredulous that i was having to argue about this - said we've already got a conservatory and we hate the bloody thing and will be knocking it down asap !
He said GOOD GOD in a big loud voice and stropped off back down the slope 😂
All that over a blinking flyer! But it was the principal of it 😂I would have defended my letter box with my life at that point!

Twat. It winds me up how much shite is posted through letterboxes.

BigglyBee · 04/12/2022 16:31

NoNamesLeft234678 · 04/12/2022 16:27

I've asked friends if they want them before writing them and even the one who doesn't like cards does and have kept the footprint ones from last year 🤷‍♀️ A lot of the baby class teachers have a place to stick cards up on the wall too and last time I gave one to his gymnastics teacher she loved it and was showing it to everyone so we must just know different types of people 🤷‍♀️

Show quote history

I think most people are too polite/kind to tell a mother (I'm guessing with a PFB?) that they binned the card with the picture of her Precious on it.

ratmatazz · 04/12/2022 16:31

I haven't sent them for 15 years. I think they're only useful for elderly relatives or neighbours, and teachers

BigglyBee · 04/12/2022 16:32

Re. general junk mail, you can register with the MPS.

www.mpsonline.org.uk/

Laiste · 04/12/2022 16:34

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2022 16:29

Some people are really sad if they can’t cope with a few cards decorating their home, and to be so anal about what decorations they have up. Bet you are the people who rearrange the Christmas tree once your DC are in bed after they have decorated the tree.

Do you throw the cards that your DC make at nursery/school straight into the recycling bin?

No, i tear them into tiny pieces and burn them and then stamp on the bits - while shouting at the kids never to make nice things.

That's what the kind of person who doesn't send xmas cards does.

😂

NoNamesLeft234678 · 04/12/2022 16:34

lookersnoopy · 04/12/2022 14:48

They are not keepsakes. They are really weird 'we are so important' type cards that most people don't want to receive let alone keep!

OP I don't do cards and only receive the odd one or 2, I have been gradually pulling back for years and surround myself with very few people naturally!

Show quote history

Everyone is different 🤷‍♀️ I did footprint ones last year and people have asked for this years cards 🤷‍♀️

LouLou198 · 04/12/2022 16:34

YANBU. For the past few years I have spent £20 on a couple of bags of food for the local food bank instead.
I hate them in my house, they clutter the place up. I didn't realise till a couple of years back that my sister told me I actually not have to display them! Game changer!
I think it will naturally dwindle, especially this year with pride of stamps/mail strikes. The one we do receive tend to be from the older generation.