Hi all.
Sorry it's going to be a long one!!!
So following from a discussion I've had on another thread.
I have been suffering with infertility for the past 3 years. My DH and I have been tracking everything we possible can, and it's just not happening for us.
Around 2 years ago now, I contacted the GP at my doctors surgery to ask for some help and guidance. I had some blood tests carried out, and they came back clear. At the time, I also had a pelvic scan done which was also okay, but they did advise they struggled to get a super clear image since I was a little overweight.
I was told I'd be placed on a waiting list for further help in the fertility department, and so I've waited patiently to be contacted by this department.
In the meantime, DH and I took care of ourselves as much as possible, continued trying but tried to relax a little to see if the 'relaxed' approach would help, but it didn't.
We decided to both have weight loss surgery to aid in our chances of conceiving, and also for personal benefits and reasons, and this has worked really well for us. We are 18st down between us now and so so much happier and healthier! We have been given the all clear from our surgical team to confirm TTC. They're extremely happy with our progress.
I got a call around a month ago from the NHS, and was told I was finally at the top of the fertility waiting list! I was so, so happy to finally be getting some guidance. I awaited my letter in the post for my appointment, and when it finally came through I attended the gynaecology department as per the letters request. I was due into the appointment at 3:30, but ended up waiting in the wait in room for over 2 hours before being seen.
I went into the dr's office at 6.40 and sat down to hear about my next steps. Confirmed my details, DOB etc etc and he began reading back through my medical notes and history. He began talking about some of the notes he had on file, and all was okay (blood work, scan etc)
He then began discussing my 'consecutive miscarriages' at 10-15 weeks pregnant' and began to apologise for the losses etc. I was shocked COMPLETELY.
This isn't me. These aren't my notes. I haven't ever been lucky enough to fall pregnant, so I was utterly confused. I told him that this was incorrect, and he looked completely confused too. He continued reading through these notes and the rest of the information was mine again... but these consecutive miscarriages weren't true.
He asked me how this happened, and I honestly have no idea. He then continued on to say that since this isn't my information, and we are not completely sure I'm even able to GET pregnant, I'm in the wrong department. I would need to go back to my GP for a re-referral to the infertility specialists. Completely cold and matter of fact.
I was so upset and frustrated at both the length of time I'd waited in his waiting room just to hear that, and the fact I've been on the waiting list for the wrong department for 2 YEARS. I was just a sobbing mess.
He dismissed me, but before leaving the room he also said 'also you need to cut back on the junk food. You're still obese. The infertility team wouldn't give you so much as a look-in when you're BMI is this high' I asked him what my BMI would need to be. He said it's currently 34, and needs to be 30 in order to be considered. I explained to him that I've had weight loss surgery and have been trying so hard to bring my weight down to help in conception.
When I left the room, I was in absolute floods of tears. I'm absolutely heartbroken that I've been referred for the wrong department and wasted SO much time waiting for this appointment, only to be referred back to the start again.
I contacted the GP reception and advised on the situation, and was called back by my current doctor (the one before who mid-referred me isn't looking after me anymore). She's taken all our info and put us back onto the correct waiting list, but couldn't advise me of how long this may be.
What are my options now? For all I know these past 2 years could have been critical for us - and we've waited for absolutely nothing.
My mental health is so low following this, I don't know how much more I can actually take.