The Lady Hussey racism thing

[Tiiiiiiiiiiired]

I am really conflicted about this.

If went to live in Japan (I did live there for 3 years several years ago) I would be expected to be asked about where I'm from because I don't look Japanese (and in fact I was asked many times! I didn't mind at all, it was my choice to be in Japan and I knew I didn't look japanese). If I chose to stay in that country and have children, I'd expect my children would be asked the same, and their children and that although they would be Japanese by birth, I would hope they would be happy to talk about their heritage and where they are from and not mind being asked why they don't look Japanese and what the history is. I wouldnt think it racist and wouldn't want such questions to be stopped because we only learn from others, and about others, by talking and feeling safe to ask questions.

So why in the UK does everyone have to be sooo careful with what they say? This woman has a non English name, was wearing some non western clothing, as was asked about her heritage. Why is this abuse?

We need to stop being so sensitive and allow dialogue.

Squeezita
And what clothes and hairstyle will you as a white person wear so we can assume your heritage?

A man wearing a kilt would probably have to answer a few questions about his heritage - fairly common at weddings these days.

'It seems to me that using words such as violence and abuse to refer to such a conversation is something of a disservice to those women suffering from violent domestic abuse.'

Yes it surely diminishes actual abuse and violence if a false equivalence to this situation can be brought.

I do feel a wee bit sorry for Camilla, her trusted mate wrecked her event by being racist, offensive and unwelcoming to a guest. I'd be well fucked off if one of my friends did that.

You mean the women who has dedicated her life to supporting victims of domestic abuse is now accused of disservicing the women she supports by calling racist abuse abuse. Okay....

I'm sure you also dedicate your life to supporting victims of domestic abuse and are therefore best placed to make this judgement about her intentions

Neither you nor I know her intentions so I am not sure what your point is

I went looking for the source of “the tide is turning online, Sistah Space wasn’t directly invited”, and, well.

My point is:

Saying that the women who has dedicated her life to supporting victims of domestic abuse is disservicing the women she supports by calling racist abuse abuse is a pretty low blow.

Where did the transcript of the conversation come from? I mean if I was having an awkward chat with Lady Susan I’m not sure I would remember word for word what was said. Did she immediately write it down, or was it recorded?

i just don’t think that I would remember how many times someone asked me the same question, but Ngozi Fulani states it was 7 or 8.

@carefulcalculator
Ive actually done research which shows that most people are very unreliable witnesses especially in stressful situations. It’s one of the reasons the CPS will not prosecute sometimes because peoples accounts vary so much.
I would have expected in this situation the woman would have been thinking wtf and got too annoyed/upset/stressed to remember every detail, especially in an unfamiliar scenario.

Well it’s a pretty awful thing to do!

Are you actually saying calling racist abuse 'abuse" is a pretty awful thing to do

Not doling out the racist abuse, just the calling it abuse

I really hope I am misunderstanding you here

‘I think it would be a very sad world if we always assumed the most malign possible intent behind someone's words, unless they were cognitively, linguistically and socially able to stick to rapidly changing social mores‘

Do you think this 83y woman had cognitive issues? Was she the right person for this role then? Not all 83y olds are frail with dementia btw. Why are you so intent
on finding reasons to defend LH? Instead of taking her behaviour at face value.

People who witnessed the conversation have corroborated NF's account. Do you think they and the Palace are lying about what happened @Fairyliz?

Lady Hussey assumed she was not British because she is black. Racist. When she asked where she was from, the guest responded Hackney, and LH persisted, no, where are you really from. She asked 7 times, being unable to accept this black woman was born and bred in Britain. It was rude, insensitive and downright arrogant of LH to persist in her interrogation. She used to being kowtowed to, used to getting her own way, totally intolerable.

You are. HTH

This

I would like to know what Ngozi’s rationale was in ‘tweeting’ about this incident.

Anyway let’s hope this high profile case stops people addressing the ‘where are you really from’ question to people. The outraged racists may well not agree with the rationale but they might realise they need to shut up if they are in public, at work etc.

Given that she is now characterising it as abuse and saying she can’t believe it happened in a space supposed to be protecting women from violence thereby implying that the interaction was an act of violence or abuse

Er, no. Safe spaces are not just to save against violence, they should be a space space to talk.

You have twisted it into about violence, no one said Hussey was violent to Ms Fulani.

It seems to me that using words such as violence and abuse to refer to such a conversation is something of a disservice to those women suffering from violent domestic abuse.

So you didn't mean she was doing a disservice to the women she supports then?

I think we’re going round in circles because the mirror article interface is so bad.

I’m referring to Ngozi’s dress, not headress. Which just looks like a dress.

It’s her own words from the article on the BBC homepage, not mine.

How often do we see a man in a quilt though, except on special occasions.

So true. I can’t recall the last time I saw a man sporting a quilt!

I know this is a serious topic but I think it would be awesome if men started wandering around in patchwork quilts...

It would be a very special occasion!

😂

Sorry, kilt. Can I plead illness please