The Lady Hussey racism thing

[Tiiiiiiiiiiired]

I am really conflicted about this.

If went to live in Japan (I did live there for 3 years several years ago) I would be expected to be asked about where I'm from because I don't look Japanese (and in fact I was asked many times! I didn't mind at all, it was my choice to be in Japan and I knew I didn't look japanese). If I chose to stay in that country and have children, I'd expect my children would be asked the same, and their children and that although they would be Japanese by birth, I would hope they would be happy to talk about their heritage and where they are from and not mind being asked why they don't look Japanese and what the history is. I wouldnt think it racist and wouldn't want such questions to be stopped because we only learn from others, and about others, by talking and feeling safe to ask questions.

So why in the UK does everyone have to be sooo careful with what they say? This woman has a non English name, was wearing some non western clothing, as was asked about her heritage. Why is this abuse?

We need to stop being so sensitive and allow dialogue.

@multivac."She was wearing a sparkly animal print pinafore frock over a long sleeved tee. An outfit I might choose. I don't think anyone would assume it to be an 'African heritage dress' if I wore it though."
I apologise then. I was lead to believe it was some kind of heritage dress, but obviously not.
I actually think the first question, on the lines of "where are you from?", would have been ok, as this is the kind of question asked of anyone, maybe?
As this could imply from what organisation, as well as location.
But the persitence was what made it racist.
Lady Hussey should have known better.

We have only heard one side of the story. This Lady has been within the Royal Household years. She will know how to conduct herself at these functions and events. She will have had lessons on how to greet and behave. Sorry I don't believe the accusations.

She's 80. The very clumsy stuff my Dad comes out with, when he genuinely doesn't mean offence is outstanding.

I don't like how all the focus is now on this exchange, and not on the purpose of the event which was about violence against women and girls.

Ngozi didn't need to go nuclear.

Eh? She’s being employed to do this as her job. It’s the reason she was there. What’s her age got to do with it?

YABU - the whole line of questioning was racist and inapproriate. That said Lady Hussy has now resigned and that should be the end of it. She's in her 80 and has lost her job; a witchunt is unnecessary.

Another racist comment about her dress. Give it a rest.

Just because Hussey has talked to black people before doesn’t preclude her from making judgements about a black woman and expecting her to submissively answer her question.

Unfortunately for Hussey, she picked on a woman who was not afraid to challenge Hussey’s racist assumptions.

I don't know people keep saying she answered Hackney? She herself said that she said the charity was based there she didn't say that is where she is from. She was sidestepping the question, for what reason she was she was sidestepping only she knows. The royal person should have had her wits about her and realised Ngozi was sidestepping the question and stopped asking and moved along to someone that wanted to chat again for what reason only she knows.

I’m conflicted a bit tbh, I think her demanding to know and style of questioning together not with not accepting the woman wasn’t comfortable for whatever reason in divulging her ethnic background was definitely wrong. However, the question in itself is not racist, it’s something I’ve been asked myself as a white women a lot of times around the world when travelling and even in the UK, I think if you have a different accent/name/skin colour to the average person in the country or region you are in people are just curious.

I work and live in a very diverse area and most non-white British people ask other people (especially other non-white people or those with non British sounding names or accents) where their families originate from, surely they aren’t being racist as well, they’re just curious or want to know about a person? I suppose I don’t really understand her refusal to divulge her ethnicity when to most other people it seems to be a fairly straightforward question and doesn’t seem to be an issue, but I’m guessing she has had some issues in the past with people insinuating or saying she is not British because she is black and it has left her defensive/reluctant to discuss it.

I'm fed up of the African dress red herring.

If a white woman wore that the question would be "Where's your outfit from?" and a follow up question would be "have you spent time there?"

The dress is not an excuse to disbelieve her nationality. Lady Hussey had so many opportunities to back out of that situation and took none of them. Stop victim blaming.

It doesn't matter if NF was being deliberately obtuse. The responsibility isn't on her to make the conversation flow.
My DH often heads off questions about his heritage in the exact same way. Is he being deliberately obtuse? Yy because he doesn't want his heritage to be the focus of the conversation. Are there other times when he will openly discuss his heritage? Yy. Both approaches are valid. It's entirely up to him.
It is always on the person asking the questions to read the cues.

Ngozi on the radio just now saying exactly the same - why was this the question, why does she have to keep explaining about her heritage when she is there to represent her charity.

Why did SHE get asked this question, why not asked of other people?

I think it must get fucking draining being asked this shit by racist twats, when you want to get on with your work.

That's not acceptance of the "transcript".
She probably did it to avoid the situation dragging on and causing further embarrassment to the RF. Which it would have done if she'd defended herself and given her own recollection of the conversation.

Is your dad a diplomat employed to host events with all sorts of people from all sorts of background and make them feel at ease and welcome?

It WASN’T a transcript!!!

I presume LH thought she hadn’t understood the question so was trying to rephrase it rather than picking up that NF was being deliberately obtuse because she didn’t like the Implication of the question.

I think that basically sums it up!

The royal household has been racist and backwards for years. Conduct and lessons on how to greet and behave will have taken place yonks ago. It’s not a bastion of modern societal norms.

Really impressed with Ngozi for not letting it go. The question is loaded, and touching her hair is very disrespectful. The combination of the two smacks of racism to me. I'm not a black woman and I make a point of believing people when they call out racism. Hopefully this is a learning opportunity for many people.

Perhaps it is partly contextual. My (non-white) parent asks people where they are from all the time and the comment is always taken in the spirit on which it was intended but maybe they should stop. This situation is quite different anyway - there's a power differential at play as the question/interrogation comes from a white woman with extreme privilege and hair touching.

I have had elderly relatives who would say old fashioned things (although most of them are long dead and would be well over 100 by now). I knew that and would not choose them to represent me in public at events attended by people from diverse cultures.

Her views surely can't be news to the King and Queen. Why on earth did they actively choose to redeploy her in this new role? Why wasn't she quietly retired?

This is a conversation I don't wish to have with anyone though

Least of all if I'm at a royal event, which I consider to be a key part of my heritage, having been born and raised here.

of course others may feel differently, but it's no different than repeating "g'wan g" wan" about the question. It's been answered. I'd never ask it initially.

I agree in part.

Though to be honest, asking where are you from to a person of color IS offensive. Especially if they have a British accent. If they clearly have a non- British accent, ok. But if they have a British accent why on earth wouldn’t you assume they are British?! It’s othering people of color, making it clear that you don’t see them as belonging here in the way white people do.

I bet you never had a Japanese accent in Japan OP.

I agree OP, enough with the faux naiveté, everybody understands the « where are you from Q » no need to pretend it is purely about citizenship and play dumb when answering.

I have been living in the UK for 10y+ and in the process of getting citizenship, I have a strong accent from my home country, and a very foreign last name from another country.
When someone asks where I am from I am happy that they are interested, and even after becoming British why would I pretend I don’t understand the question is about my accent / name?

Are you white OP? I think we can safely assume from the OP that you're not Chinese or South Korean because you'd be describing very different experience about living in Japan.

What makes you think Lady SH didn't say what she is reported to have said @RoseMadderAsHell? There were other people there who have corroborated NF's telling of the event.

Others corroborated Ngozi’s transcript.

It must have taken courage for Ngozi to speak up, she knew people like you would accuse her of lying.

I agree.
It was a clumsy initial question & out of step with modern thinking.
I think that a person of her age / background would have been used to rather imperiously asking: 'And where are you from / what do you do' all the time, for the last 60 years. BUT she didn't back down. The other party clearly said they were from the UK. Then seemed upset / offended at the continued line of Qu's
At which point Susan Hussey should have shut up. She has just thrown away 60 years of service by cornering herself & having no real option other than to resign.
It doesn't reflect well on the Royal Family.