To not want to meet this guest?

[Avisit]

I very possibly am.

guest staying with us over Christmas so working out logistics - we live outside of UK in a tourist city.

we don’t have a car - nobody does here so the options from the airport are cab or train. Guest feels cab is too expensive and they only want to take the train if I come and meet them at the airport but they don’t want to switch their data on so that makes meeting tricky, plus I will be 7.5 months pregnant by then.

It’s an English speaking country that they have visited (including this city) before. Guest is not elderly and we are paying for most things whilst they are here.

Shall I just pay for their cab given they have paid for their flights to visit or would you expect a guest of navigate their way to our house (every other guest ever has done this)

You must have missed this post by the OP

Shes mid 30s, healthy and lives in London and has travelled and lived abroad but sometimes can be a bit delicate and lack independence. It’s my cousin but also consider her friend. I bet I will end up paying for her cab.

She should find out what international plans her phone provider offers. Mine offers inexpensive 15-day and 30-day options with plenty of data.

Give her some instructions re. public transport and she’ll be able to find her way to you. Just be clear that you can’t come out to meet her at the airport. I’m never met at airports either, I think hosting is more than enough-unless it’s elderly parents, for example.

Ah. Thanks.

They can buy a prepaid card at the damn airport if they CBA paying roaming.

Out of curiousity, how much would a cab be? Is it likely to go up for an obvious tourist in New York at Christmas? At first I thought she was a CF, but the subway in New York at Christmas alone with luggage is a lot. Does she have reason to be nervous of traveling alone in a cab? Could she genuinely not afford it? Is she bringing you things like gifts from family or items for baby and so weighed down more than usual with luggage?

I do think meeting a guest at an airport is customary tbh. Do you have a partner that can meet her instead of you?

Edinburgh has a very accessible and regular tram link.

If your guest is a bit nervous about getting off the plane and trying to find the train station, could you maybe make it as easy as possible for her and send her out a detailed map and clear directions of where she could go. I travel a bit with work and it can be intimidating trying to navigate around an airport that you don't know. Especially after a long flight.

Alternatively, could you maybe offer to go halves on the taxi with her?

JFK does have WiFi even if she won't turn on her data. However if I were her I'd pre-book a car. This has always been cheaper for airport transfers in NY than just getting into the line at the taxi rank. YANBU at all.

If someone can afford to catch flights to visit you, then they can afford a taxi to your house. They are being unreasonable to expect a 7.5 month woman to meet them at the station, even assuming you could find them if they refuse to switch their phones on! They have issues but don't pander to them, just say they will have to make their own way to your house.

Arrrgh I’m so annoyed on your behalf. Your cousin needs to grow up. She’s getting free accommodation in NYC at Christmas. Tell her to spend some of the money she’s saving on the taxi. If she’s too cheap to do that, JFK is no more difficult to navigate than Heathrow, even with luggage. Besides, how much can she possibly bring for a visit anyway? A wheeled suitcase and a carryon is easy to navigate with, I do it all the time, and I have a bad back!

Even if she is cheeky enough to expect her 7.5 months pregnant generous host to meet her (please don’t), I seem to remember there being free wifi there when I last went through this past summer. There’s no reason at all for you to stand in the piss poor arrivals section waiting for ages while she faffs around trying to find someone to hold her hand through passport control (probably).

I can’t stand lazy people who refuse to look after themselves.

Me too; if your only issue is that you're pregnant, I think that's a little mean.

Of course she must be contactable; but I'd absolutely want to meet someone coming to stay with me, if I could.

I went from jfk to Manhattan 7.5 months pregnant with luggage and a toddler by metro. Let your friend get on with it.

You could tell her that you’re not comfortable standing for any length of time, nor will you be in a position to help carry suitcases on a train. If she would prefer to get a train, you can meet her, but as you can’t gauge how long it will take her to navigate the airport, and she won’t be able to let you know when she’s through, you will track her flight online, and will arrive at the airport three hours after she lands to be sure that she’s ready. She can wait in one of the non existent cafes for you to arrive. Or she can just pay for a cab - which would probably be cheaper than drinking coffee for three hours anyway.

I would always take a cab from JFK. As long as she goes to the official taxi rank & ignores any randoms offering her lifts, it’s well regulated so no need to worry about getting fleeced.

I would not be going to meet her in your circumstances

The cost of the cab is part of HER travel expenses. It is super easy to get a cab at JFK and pay a flat rate for transfer. Why would you pay?

There is no way I would travel into the city then back out

I can understand her feeling unsure. There are many YouTube videos to help her.

Either she makes her own way or doesn't come.

If someone can afford to catch flights to visit you, then they can afford a taxi to your house.

This. She’s being ridiculous. She gets herself to you if she’s visiting. She’s not a child.

Having just come back from NY, I'm not sure I would feel all that confident getting the train/metro alone (I did it with my partner and we didn't really know what we were doing but managed it together). I would, however, get a cab and would have factored this into the cost of my holiday/visit.

Do you have a partner who can meet her? I think it would be a nice gesture if so but otherwise, a cab is a perfectly ok solution.

She’s being completely fucking pathetic. Don’t crumble on this one, OP.

Your cousin can get a cab and she can pay for it. They are usually fixed price going from JFK into NY or if she doesn't want to pay that she can get the train.

JFK as the OP says does not have nice places to sit and wait. We are spoiled with Heathrow and Gatwick where this could be done easily other than ££££ for parking.

US passport control can be a nightmare and it is how long is a piece of string.

To those of you who worked up to having a baby that's great for you. I did but out of necessity and was in extreme pain and with a pelvis support. If OP doesn't feel fit enough to traipse to an airport on public transport to meet a healthy 30 year adult then that's that.

Absolutely! It’s absolutely incredible tbh!

I thought the official NYC yellow cab taxis at JFK had a fixed price including tolls from airport to Manhattan. I did this a few times and enjoyed the journey into the city as part of the tourist experience.

My friend in NYC now books me a limo to meet me off my flight (cheaper than the official yellow cab) they are the ones with the name boards in arrivals.

After a long flight with luggage it's a good option. I pay and tip the Limo driver when I arrive at her place. It's good value

OP I'd be concerned that she might find paying state sales tax and tipping an alien concept if she is such a cheapskate miser!

Get her to buy a travel guide to NyC all the info is there to inform herself

Good luck

You muppet! That’s what the “oh I don’t want to take the train, it’s too expensive” bs is all about

the cheeky mare! You’re paying for most of the expenses for her while she’s there already, it’s the absolute fucking least she could do.

ffs. I paid for a cab to my sisters in Manhattan and I was travelling with luggage AND a 2 yo.

your cousin lives in London. She knows exactly what to do. So just give her your address, tell her to WhatsApp you when she’s in the cab and leave her to it

DO NOT PAY FOR HER CAB

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER If your DH offers to collect the guest, it's unfair to criticise her for taking up the offer. If it's too early for him, then you could ask her to choose between (a) taking a cab or (b) waiting at the airport until a more civilised time

If they can get to an airport and fly to another country, they can get to your house. Their choice to visit you, they get to their destination.