AIBU to get 6 year old get ear piercings?

[MRIELA]

Hello all, my 6 year old has been asking for months for ear piercings (her cousin got them at 5) , I have talked to her about the importance of daily cleaning, that there is always risk of infection etc and havent brought it uo myself until she asks if I have made an appointment yet and when could I make one. I talked to local piercing salons, of course needle piercings are the best but they dont deal with customers under 14. Which brings me to Claires (or does anyone know another better place perhaps?)- I had gun piercings myself at 7 and luckily had no problems, must say I am in my 30s and would still let no one near me with a needle :). Was I lucky because I read a lot of negative things about gun piercings, does anyone have any good/bad experiences with a younger child,any regrets or all went well?

Far too young. No six year old needs to wear earrings. Happy to be called a snob on this.

I think you read my post wrong. I didn't say my teacher friends. I said many people generally, by it OP's friends, family or her DC's teacher. Looking at many views on this on here, my views are not out of the ordinary.

*Be it

Profanity? I used a descriptive word. A truthful one. I am not racist or xenophobic. HTH

I was 6 when I got my ears pierced by - horror of horrors - a gun.

Incredibly, my ears did not fall off and I’m still alive to tell the tale 30 years later.

I don't care about whether kids should get their ears pierced or not but want to share great advice I got from a woman with older daughters. She said that she found it a really good parenting practice to set an age for things and then be firm about sticking to it. It teaches the kids delayed gratification, it means they're not rushing straight to the next thing and it also means that they learn to trust your word on big things that are important to them. Just another perspective.

1. I think she is too young to be fully responsible. It's not just about cleaning them, but touching them at all. I have a six-year-old and there's no way, consciously or not, that she would be able to avoid touching them!

1. Guns are seriously bad news. It's a blunt trauma to the ear, which can cause damage and increased risk of infection. You will be able to find a proper piercing place who will pierce children's ears with a needle and parental permission. Or, if she's not keen on a needle, use that as a deterrent! I've explained to my DD how ears are pierced and that was more than enough to put her off!

1. They do look tacky on small children. Sorry. Let's just say there's only certain children in DD's class who have them pierced...

There's absolutely no need to pierce a baby. It can't give consent. It's no benefit to an infant and could cause pain or scarring

Secondary school would seem to be a reasonable age for a child to be sensible enough to self care etc

All these posters whose five year olds are mature enough to maintain lobe hygiene. Really? Most five year olds I know can't be trusted to clean their teeth!

@mnchat I've reported your post in which you call me a vile individual, because there's no need for personal attacks. I'm sorry you had to take it to that level.

You may not agree with me but many do, that inflicting an injury on a child who is too young to understand or consent, for the sake of parental gratification, is child abuse.
What does a baby gain from having pierced ears? Literally nothing. The parents on the other hand, have what they think to be a pretty bejewelled baby. It's abusive behaviour, pure and simple. Likening it to cutting a tongue tie (which is done to aid feeding and future speech) is a ridiculous comparison. Bit like comparing a boob job with an appendicectomy.

I've reported them too

I had my ears done at 10 years old, I think 6 is a bit young. I had mine done with a needle as my Mum wouldn't let me have them done with a gun and I don't think I'd recommend anyone getting a piercing with a gun.

"I think everyone knows belly button piercings are meant to be sexual to attract attention to the navel area- why would you even compare the two?"

This is a bit weird. When I had my belly button done at 16 I didn't even consider it had any sexual connotations, I got it done because I thought it looked pretty. I still have it pierced and still think it's pretty, but I still don't think it's a "sexual" piercing hahah

I think it depends on how mature your child is, and whether they are able to make this decision.

I offered my daughter the chance to have them done aged 8, after she has asked for it for a while, but in the end she turned it down as she didn’t fancy the bother of looking after them.

For me the bar is, are they old enough to look after them themselves - cleaning, turning etc every day. Will a bit of checking maybe, but mainly responsible. That to me gives an indication of whether they’re old enough to make the decision.

6 seems a little young on that reckoning.

My local piercer is Holier Than Thou in Manchester which is one of the best studios in the UK. They will pierce a child’s lobes at 8, provided that the child and parent both have ID and that the child can ask for the piercing themselves, consent to it and demonstrate understanding of the aftercare involved. They won’t pierce under-8s partly because they don’t think they can really consent in an informed way but also because their ears might not be big enough to support Theo piercing or there could be a risk it will look lopsided as they grow. I would look at their website for more info regardless of where you go, as they also have a lot of info on there about why gun piercings are a really bad idea.

My niece had her ears pierced when she was very young as her mum thought 'it would save her getting them done when she was older' - she was forgetful about wearing studs only at school and often lost them during PE. Eventually they closed up and healed. So that was a waste of time, wasn't it? IIWY I'd wait until she's older and a bit more responsible.

My daughter wanted hers done early; I wasn't much fussed but DH didn't want them done. We settled on 16 as her age of liberation and she got them done on her 16th birthday. At least by then she was old enough to keep them clean and look after them herself.

I've had a piercing done there and it was really good! Would recommend to anyone in the area.

I think I’d wait until my child was in secondary school so 11 years old to have their ears pierced

Having said that… my parents let me decide at 15-16 years old (I had them done at Claire’s) and honestly at the time I wish they got mine done earlier

I don’t think it would be a huge deal if you let her get them done a 6 years old

I wouldn't but I was allowed to get mine pierced at 10 and massively regret it. I don't think I understood the decision past the short term. I haven't worn earrings in over 20 years now and still have the holes and my lobes are slightly dimpled. I'd rather have my pre piercing lobes.

I find it really interesting how many people who seem to think gun piercings on children are fine because:

A. I had it done with a gun and I lived

B. You're just snobby if you raise concerns about Claire's and other places with limited training

C. Everyone else has it done with a gun at Claire's/similar places

D. But all the children have it done mid primary/ everyone else does it

E. My child will pester me and keep saying they want it

F. My child can definitely consent and knows what it involves... But it's essential they have it done with a gun somewhere where people have next to no training because then they can do two guns at once and my child would definitely refuse to have the second one done after the first one.

It's bizarre that some adults genuinely would know the facts and still choose a higher risk option of putting holes in their child's ears because a child says they want it and everyone else is doing it. What happened to being a grown up?

You calling children "tacky" says far more about you than it does them. Tells me that you're snobby.

It is a ridiculous thing to do at that age. Kids ask for lots of stuff but we say no because it isn't in their best interests. Does your child need to have holes in her ears so she can wear pretty jewellery? No she doesn't.

No chance - wait until she is a teenager.

I'm calling pierced ears on young children tacky, not the children themselves. Let's be honest, it's more about what the parents want at that age, rather than the children themselves.

It's because the parents want them to have it done, it's like they're an accessory.

There's no way a six-year-old would want it done so much that you couldn't convince them otherwise. Okay, they might say in passing that they would like them done, but pretty much the only reason is because so-and-so in their class or whoever has them done.

And if you explain how exactly they will get a hole put through their ear twice, the fact that they will be sore and all the rigmarole that comes with cleaning them, the fact that they can't touch their lobes for six plus weeks, I'm betting that 9 times out of 10, they will go, "Nah, actually, I'm all right."

And if they don't, just say that they can have them pierced at 11 or whenever if they still want them like I'm doing with my DD about wanting a phone