Such a rude girl

[SomethingweirdaboutNoddy]

My Dd, 4.

She’s just become really rude, especially since she started school.
It was always the only thing that I was ever really bothered about…her being kind and just hopefully a nice, polite person.
She really isn’t anymore and I’m wondering if this is a phase, maybe at 4?
We've always taught her to speak nicely, try to be kind etc, and she *Can be kind some of the time, but she’s also become quite rude in the way she speaks to us and other kids and even other adults.
She’s v bossy and demanding and sulks around the playground and tends to pull
faces at other kids/not want to play with them. She used to run up to them happily before.
We were stood in the queue at the playground cafe today, behind another woman and she was moaning ‘I wanted to go there, hurry up’ etc, luckily the lady didn’t hear her but it sounded so awful.
Dh and I are v calm, polite people and I’ve no idea where she’s getting this from or when our teaching her the kinder way to be will rub off.
Where are we going wrong?

Maybe “politeness” needs to be rephrased as “social skills” then. Which is what most decent parents want for their children in order for them to get on in the world. And those social skills involve saying “please” and “thank you” when necessary, and not complaining loudly about strangers whose presence is inconvenient to us. That’s what I would mean by “politeness”, and it’s been up there as one of the most important values for me to teach my children (maybe influenced by having a child with ASD, so I’ve had to work extra hard).

I think if the OP is concerned enough to be posting then she’ll be able to steer her daughter in the right direction and all will be fine.

Doubt that. Raising a child to be kind, polite and nice is a basic responsibility. If it’s important to you that your child is liked by others, that is.

That applies to girls and boys. It is possible to be kind, polite, nice AND assertive.