To expect doctors to have basic people skills?!

[Isthatmcormac]

Ended up at the out of hours GP during the night with 2 year old. Soaring temp that wouldn’t come down. Called 111 for advice, they booked in a callback which we got 4 hours later. DS asleep by this point. 111 booked him in with out of hours and asked us to attend as they were concerned about his breathing rate when they listened in on the phone. 45 min drive from us. So of course, we got him in the car and headed straight there just to be safe.

The doctor was awful. Walked in and sat down with DS - doctor didn’t even speak to us, just grabbed DSs ear to look inside it. DS started screaming and pulled his head away. Doctor barked at me that I need to “play my part and hold him”. My bum had literally barely hit the seat before he grabbed his ear. Of course if I’d known he was going to examine him I’d have held him properly! Then asks “why’s he so sensitive about his ears? Doesn’t seem normal for his age”. Asked me a few questions about other symptoms - barely let me get 2/3 words out each time then just talked over me in a horrendously patronising way. Eg, “how’s his appetite?” “He gave me back half...” “well you’re probably feeding him to much!”

Took DS temperature and muttered “it’s not even high”, walked out of the room, came back in with a bottle of Amoxycillin and handed me it, held the door open for us while he said “paracetamol and ibuprofen, which you do actually have to give regularly. Give him that (the amoxycillin) if you want or wait 48 hours and see how he is. Put him to bed in a nappy with a loose cotton sheet and a fan on”

And that was that. Not even a hello. Didn’t want to listen to a single thing that I felt I should be telling him regarding symptoms etc. Consultation probably lasted 2/3 minutes if that.
When 111 called us back they gave us our pick of appointment times, literally every 15 mins, and commented how quiet our out of hours was that night. So it’s not as if he was rushed of his feet with a waiting room full. I know services on the whole are ridiculously stretched and there are much bigger issues but AIBU to expect GPS to have some basic people skills?! All DS has said since is “mummy, please no doctor again!” 🙄 so that’ll be him kicking off next time he has to go for anything.

YANBU

Your poor little boy; feeling unwell and treated like that

No excuse

We really do need to tackle this "put up and shut up" and "take it or leave it" attitude from some NHS staff who clearly think that because the patient isn't paying "per treatment" they don't deserve any kind of professional service.

Say it again!

Its not crap - you get as many complaints about doctors being too diplomatic and polite as you do about doctors being too curt, often the same doctors, sometimes the same consultation!

I'm afraid I don't believe this.

I'm sure you get complaints about doctors being indecisive, or not communicating clearly what the problem is, what the treatment is, etc., but that's not the same as complaining about doctors being polite or tactful.

I know a woman who has bought four sports cars and a mansion on the back of a business that gets kids into medical school. Any kid as long as they have been hothoused to get the grades and Mum and Dad can pay. I’m sure one of the things that you can pay for is being taught to sound like you have empathy at interview.

Surely being polite and tactful are basic skills for adults and it should be a no brainer for a Doctor to have these skills?

So giving another patient bad news makes it acceptable to upset a toddler and not listen to your next patient at all? How is a doctor supposed to accurately diagnose if he doesn’t ask about the child’s symptoms? He wasn’t just rude he was clinically negligent.

People like you rushing to justify poor treatment is the reason why nothing ever improves. You need to complain op. Stress or no stress this is completely unacceptable.

The doctor really doesn't sound great. But it's sad that there's always such an anti doctor pile on immediately on these threads. And half of what's said is appallingly inaccurate.

It's not anti-doctor, it's pro-appropriate compassion and consideration for patients. Anyone who has worked in the NHS will know there are some doctors - and other healthcare staff - who have a reputation for not always treating patients with kindness and care. I think they've decreased over the years, and more time is spent on communication skills during training, and of course actors are often used to assess candidates at interviews these days.

Absolutely, I know that well. But you wouldn't imagine that is the case, reading Mumsnet these days.

Just to update, unfortunately DS isn’t much better - although his temperature now seems to be responding to medication so that’s old. It looks like Scarlet Fever so he’s feeling very sorry for himself 😓

I did put in a complaint. The consultation was definitely below the standard that it should have been and to be so dismissive and not allow patients (or the parent/carer of young patients!) to speak in order to get a full picture of what’s going on could have really serious consequences in some situations.

Out of hours after certain times and in certain areas all local pharmacies will be closed. In this case the out of hours service gives out the actual medicine - they have a small stock of commonly needed stuff for this reason. If you live somewhere where pharmacies are open 24-7 or have never seen an out of hours GP at 3am then you have likely never experienced this. It’s good practice as handing a prescription you can’t actually get filled is kind of useless

At the very least, he should have asked for consent before touching your ds. As a minimum.