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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is your 22 year old living at home

87 replies

gingerbreadcastle · 14/11/2022 20:20

Just that really, mine is, she came back after graduating uni at 21 and works full time in a job related to her degree, which we are all very happy about. DD pays board in case you was wondering. I don’t mind her being at home and she can stay here as long as she likes.

OP posts:

MsVestibule · 14/11/2022 20:22

I don't think it's particularly unusual. What do you think you might be being unreasonable about?

PinkiOcelot · 14/11/2022 20:22

No. My 21 year old has bought her own house with her partner. I would have had her at home a lot longer, but she had other ideas.

Noideaatall · 14/11/2022 20:23

Mine is at home too but hasn't yet got a job. It's not ideal for any of us - I'd love him to stay as long as he likes, but I can see he is unhappy and wishes he could get his own place.

MammaWeasel · 14/11/2022 20:24

Mine are aged 23 and 25, and I can't seem to get rid of either of them.... ..

Egarag · 14/11/2022 20:24

Sounds entirely normal. Not sure what the issue is.

TinFoilHatty · 14/11/2022 20:27

Seems perfectly reasonable to me. Are we supposed to be confecting outrage at our adult children living under our roof whilst they get established in their career/work out what next after Uni etc? I might have missed that memo?

Justthisonce12 · 14/11/2022 20:27

Nope studying for a masters in Asia

nokidshere · 14/11/2022 21:00

Mine are 21 & 24. They've both returned from uni, both now working but not a hope in hells chance of getting on the property ladder here and there's just nothing on the rental market. We are very grateful that we have enough space for 4 adults to live together comfortably, I won't be kicking them out until they are ready to go.

mdh2020 · 14/11/2022 21:02

They both came back after uni and DD is still here 25 years later! Fortunately we had the loft converted and she is up there. Actually we love having her around and we spend most evenings together.

Christmasamtryigtogetexcited · 14/11/2022 21:06

Mine all came home after graduation and stayed at home for as long as it took to get a decent job and work out where they wanted to live .Absolutely loved having their company again! One was home for three years ,one for 18 months and my youngest graduated in June and had landed a fabulous well paid job in London but annoyingly for him ,he cannot find any decent flats or houseshares in London so he is commuting every day and is knackered!
Enjoy their company for as long as possible is my advice .

Tangled123 · 14/11/2022 21:14

I was a boomerang in my 20s / early 30s and moved in and out of parents house a few times before eventually buying a house with my now husband. My brother also didn’t move out until he was late 20s. Most young people can’t afford to move out now unless they’re moving with friends or a partner.

vodkaredbullgirl · 14/11/2022 21:18

My 25 yr old came back from uni 4 yrs ago, my 23 has never left.

astarsheis · 14/11/2022 21:39

DS same age back home after uni, working in London and commuting from home. We don't mind having him back, but he is taking full advantage of being home and having everything done for him.
TBF he is looking for a flat share in London with a friend but rental prices are crazy.

ThePoshUns · 14/11/2022 21:45

Mine is but he's studying. It dies t seem to be that unusual in this day and age

GordonShakespearedoesChristmas · 14/11/2022 21:47

Why not if it works for all concerned?

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 14/11/2022 22:40

I have 3 colleagues all with adult children living with them and one colleague has her daughter and granddaughter there too

ShanghaiDiva · 14/11/2022 22:49

No, my ds graduated last year and lives 2.5 hours from us.

greeandorange · 14/11/2022 23:03

I hope this happens I do love my much older teens, as they become adults I'd like them to come home for little chunks of time.

Rafting2022 · 14/11/2022 23:07

PinkiOcelot · 14/11/2022 20:22

No. My 21 year old has bought her own house with her partner. I would have had her at home a lot longer, but she had other ideas.

How did they afford this at 21?

UsingChangeofName · 14/11/2022 23:27

Not sure what you are asking if YABU about ?

OnlyTheBravest · 14/11/2022 23:27

My oldest are both back at home after uni. Both have found decent hybrid working jobs. They would love to move out with friends but rental prices are crazy. With student loan repayments and high rental prices, it made far more sense to remain at the family home, whilst saving for their own places.

I expect both of them to be around until mid/late 20s. It is the same for all of my friendship group.

mrsfollowill · 14/11/2022 23:30

We have a 20yo living at home- he has never moved out yet- skipped Uni as was mid pandemic then decided was not the route for him anyway. Works full time and has done for 6 months and saves 90% of his wages, I don't ask him for board as I'd rather he saved.
Give it 2 years and he will have 30k saved which is a great deposit for a house around here which is his goal. Depends on interest rates though!! would have been fine until recently but he can stay here until things calm down. We all get on well so I'd be a bit sad when he goes and he is still young. If he is still here at 29 then he will get a gentle push but I can't see that happening.

KitchiHuritAngeni · 14/11/2022 23:32

My 21yo rents a house with his friend, he moved out at 18 (got a really good job and can easily afford it).

My 18yo is different, he is going to be in further education until at least 22, and has some medical things he needs to sort out. He has a part time job and saves like mad, so I think he will move out at 23/24 and buy a place.

MunchMunch · 14/11/2022 23:35

Ds1 "moved out" in May when he joined the army but before that he was happy at home and wouldn't have moved out any time soon. It might have been different if he'd had a long term girlfriend and they wanted to buy/rent a house together but at the minute he's single and concentrating on his army career and comes back home every so often. He, and my other dc would be welcome to stay at home as long as they wanted.

maddy68 · 14/11/2022 23:36

My 29 yr old still is what is your problem with it?

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