To not want my personal financial affairs to be pored over by randoms?

[MxGrinch]

i am looking into getting DC into a private school as he is way too clever for his state school.

I knew of one in the next county and discovered they had academic scholarships for Yr9 entry. Had to register with them (non returnable £100 fee! we are a low income family) and arrange for DC to take the entrance test and scholarship assessments which he’ll be doing next month.

I’m obviously nowhere near as clever as DS as I thought a scholarship meant the fees would be paid! It seems they are only 10-20% paid so we will need to apply for a bursary.

I was sent the application form last week and need to return it tomorrow.

They want so much personal information such as 3 months bank statements, full income and expenditures, children’s income and expenditure. debts, car reg and value etc.it’s really flipping complicated and will take ages.

I know they need to assess whether we can afford the fees but seeing as there is no guarantee DC will even pass the entrance test, this is not information I want to share at this point as it may not go any further.

Theg have said if we don’t return it by tomorrow DC may not get a bursary at all.

AIBU to not want to give loads of private info until DS is actually offered a place?

My DD went to a very rough underperforming state school. Seven level 9’s and two level 8’s at GCSE.
Smashed her A levels.
Is now at Oxford doing a double degree.
Neither her father or I went to university. We live in a very ordinary town and are not loaded. We chose to send her to the same school as her siblings.
If they’re clever enough and have the ambition they’ll do well wherever they go to school.
If you’re so set on private school I’m afraid you need to suck it up and answer the questions.

Yup, and no need to declare the private tutor on the UCAS form, so less obviously a privilege.

Way too clever for state school? 🤣🤣🤣 whatever!

Finding out about bursaries put me off the private route a bit.

It’s one thing to pay £30,000 per year to get £30,000 worth of education and facilities for my child but quite another to pay that much for £20,000 value and also to pay another £10,000 per year to pay for someone else’s child to go, someone else whose child is likely no more “deserving” if the place than mine, and whose parents were no less privileged than me.

No thanks; I’d not pay 50% extra at the Ferrari showroom to subsidize a poor buyer who also wanted one so why do it at school?

Yeah, no. Yes you are unreasonable. I can't see how private education would fulfill your child's cleverness level as private school would only give them better conditions but same knowledge as any other school.

Have you tried grammar schools?
Private tuition?

Let him take GCSC or A-levels early and then let him move on to university.

If he's a child prodigy then he should be OK... he doesn't need private education.

YABVU. It’s free money.

I have to give that level of detail and more every 2.5 years and pay thousands each time for my husband to remain in the country paying taxes.

You sound extremely entitled.

If you want something for free that would otherwise cost tens of thousands of pounds, yes you have to let some complete strangers scrutinise your finances to check that you are financially eligible. That's how it works, not sure why you are chafing about it tbh?

And where's the issue? He either is ahead of his peers or he isn't? Which one is it?
Affording private education is not going to help. Anyone who has money can send their child (even the not so clever ones) into private education. 🙄

He could study iGCSEs independently from school if he needs more challenges.

vbac queen wow well done to your Dd!

We have pretty good state schools so we haven’t bothered. Both ours are thriving and dd1 got mostly 9s some 8s and both have really nice friends. The advantages of private as I see it is better customer care for parents and child and undeniably better sports. On balance we felt that wasn’t worth the outlay for us. Everyone’s situation is different though. The end result where we are is basically interchangeable! The teens all socialise together anyway once they get to 6th form.

It is a well known fact; once children get too clever they can’t stay in a state school.
I just don’t think there’s a state school in the land with a single clever child in it.
IF we do stumble across one we run away screaming.

What makes you think children are brighter at fee paying schools than at state ones?

Not sure what else to add apart from to advise you to fill in the forms

You're essentially applying for free money, of course they're going to need to assess things financially

Or did you think being clever = free private education?

I totally agree

Yep, he's too clever and she's too important to give justifications for why he should go for free! Keep up!

As you’ve expressed horror and surprise at the £100 fee for your son to sit the exam, I’m wondering if you’ve fully understood the bursary scheme and if it’s as generous as you think it is.

Our local private school offers a number of bursaries but they are very clear that the maximum amount of award is 50% of the school fees - which are currently £6,200 per term.

I think sometimes people confuse ‘bursary’ with ‘fully funded’.

I am looking into getting DC into a private school as he is way too clever for his state school.

I think you win the internet today for pretentious nonsense. If your kid is as bright as you seem to think, he wont do any better in a private school than he would in a state school.

If he's as clever as you say, he'll breeze the entrance. Just fill out the form. it's a sad state of affairs when our state schools are so underfunded and teachers are so overworked that they're not able to meet your child's needs.
Good luck!
If we lived in an enlightened society, there'd be no private schools but sadly that's not the case.

It’s going to be the opposite if anything surely. If you have intelligent children then they’ll do fine anywhere, but if they don’t have what it takes then they’ll benefit from the private schooling that they need.

If ours turn out to be a bit sub-par then that’d definitely be a reason to move them to the private sector.

If on the other hand they are coming home from state school complaining that their teacher couldn’t explain chaos theory or continental drift properly then we’ll take them through it ourselves.

No thanks; I’d not pay 50% extra at the Ferrari showroom to subsidize a poor buyer who also wanted one so why do it at school?
Have Ferrari dealers been granted charitable status?

No words just 😆

Jeez - do you have any idea how much you'll be spending when your kid needs driving lessons & wants to go to Uni! 🙄 Too clever for state school?? Well my DD just got 3 A*s in Biology, Chemistry & Maths & is now doing a Chemistry degree & she went to her local Secondary school 🤭 as well as all 7s, 8s & 9s in her GCSEs. So you lost me at that sentence I'm afraid 😂 Unless you're getting 100% scholarship I think you're crazy. Oh & my best friend has been working in a private school for a year & she is shocked at how badly it's run & how many safe-guarding issues there are 😪 so don't assume throwing money at your kid's education is the answer to everything

Rich people go to private schools not clever ones!

Or clever ones who are awarded a bursary.

No, and I’ve no issue with private schools losing it either. Paying 20% extra in VAT to the state who can spend it on the genuinely needy would be far better than paying 50% extra to the school who’ll use it to let some other relatively well-off family get into private school cheaply.