Friend has posted this on FB

[Conkersareback]

Am I missing a double meaning with this? Or should I be concerned that my friend is feeling low and I should reach out to her? It's an
unusual type of thing for her to do if she is publicly saying how she feels.

Not all people who post stuff like this are "attention seeking" my daughter struggles massively with her MH and has had suicide attempts in the past. She finds it hard to speak to people face to face and she sometimes posts stuff like this, I see that as her putting out how she's feeling and take it as a cue to check in on her

That’s not her actual words though, is it?

Its one of those things that people randomly share because they think they identify with it a little bit?

And you sound like an absolute cunt.

Not nice when people are unkind, is it?

Your friends never meet your emotional needs? Ever had a hug from a friend at a difficult time? Ever had a friend say "I hope you feel better soon" when you're not feeling great? Ever had a friend empathise in any way with how you're feeling?

I mean, we're all different and maybe some people have friends who only meet practical needs (ie someone to go places with etc), but for me the hallmark of a friendship so emotional connection and mutual emotional support as and when needed. That's just me, though 🤷‍♀️

I knew a teenager who posted similarly alarming memes on social media. None of their friends approached them or told an adult.

Now that young person is dead.

So fuck off with your holier-than-thou opinion, @Katelyn88 and try to find some compassion.

OP, ring your friend. Even better, if they live close by, visit. Tell another mutual friend if you can so they also know to be aware.

Some statistics have shown (and I got this from a close relative who works in a field that works with colleges and schools to advise about protective measures wrt suicides) that if you feel that somebody is in danger of doing that, then you should ask them if they have ever considered killing themselves.
I know this sounds strange, it does to me, but she said that people that might be considering that often would like somebody to talk to about it and get some help.
I would imagine if they are feeling so hopeless that they would consider killing themselves, anybody that came up with an 'oh for God's sake shut up, you're just attention seeking' could really be the final straw. It makes me angry just thinking about people that are so careless of other's feeling that they would say this..

I sincerely hope none of your friends ever post something like that as a last ditch cry for help.

There are many reasons why people post stuff like this, you can't possibly know why OP's friend is posting or what it says about her without knowing the context & reason why she has posted.

Glad you're going to check up OP, especially as this is out of character.

@RambamThankyouMam If anyone sounds pathetic, it's you. And I could never be friends with such a hateful, cold and ignorant person.

@Conkersareback could her Facebook have been hacked

@Katelyn88 You're a disgrace, absolutely inhuman, hateful and cold. It's because of people like you that some like the OP's friend are too afraid to open up and then they're found dead and everyone wonders "why they didn't say anything". According to you, cries for help are 'attention seeking' and 'immature'. What a horrible person. If you had any experience of depression or trauma, you wouldn't be so hateful, cold and ignorant. You should be ashamed of yourself.

This isn't true though.

In many families you're shamed for having emotional needs. Or shamed for having a visible emotional reaction to being hurt. Or labelled sensitive for feeling your own emotions and labelled cold-hearted for not feeling their emotions.

Your experience is not everbody else's. people who have been invalidated their whole life are so THIRSTY for validation.

I can recognise it now in people who are at the beginning of these realisations.

You don't have to reach out to all of the 500 friends on your fb list but if your friend is feeling this need to be heard, if she's a friend, I'd like to hear her

@Mariposista Read the OP's posts before you wrongly write off a cry for help as 'seeking attention and validation'. The OP has said this is OUT OF CHARACTER for her, and highly unusual.

@Outtasteamandluck So you like being a martyr and getting attention via feeling smug and superior. How are you any different? Not to mention most people cannot get a therapist then and there when they need one.

Friends exist exactly for emotional needs. That's why they're friends. That's the whole point. This 'Oh I am so much stronger and more superior than you mugs because I wait til I can afford/get a therapist' smug self-serving, attention-seeking bs makes me roll my eyes so hard they'd almost roll out of their sockets and down my throat. Give your head a wobble. You are not better than anyone else, you're just foolish and need to feel superior.

The key thing here is that it is out of character.

Best case scenario is she just had a lot to drink on top of a particularly bad day, got overly emotional and she’ll wake up this morning thinking why on earth did I post that!

worst case is she’s been going through some bad stuff, hasn’t been handling it and last night reached a complete low and didn’t know how to reach out. Or to who.

im glad you’re going to check in on her Op, and I hope it’s just the first one. As it’s so out of character there’s something that’s bothering her and your call may be just what she needs right now.

I can relate to that post .

If I was feeling low and deep under the voices in my head I might share it too simply because it resonates and would succinctly express what I'm feeling.On a good day (and most days are good) I'd just go "ha" and scroll past it.

@singlemomof3 You are ever so deeply ill-informed and ignorant. People do cries for help. This is one of them. OP has said it is out of character. Your attitude is backwards and uneducated and ignorant, and decades out of date. Do better.

you sound like a good friend op.

People always say 'talk to someone' if you're feeling down. This is someone's way of 'talking.' Not everyone can talk out loud, verbalise their feelings face to face. That 'talking' can take many forms. It's not attention seeking, especially if this is unlike their usual posts.

@JennyNotFromTheBlock thank you for your insight. I reserve the right to think exactly how I like, as I'm sure you do too.

Yes friends have met or attempted to and after years of being an emotional drain, I've learned not to. I've learned it's best I resolve my issues myself with the help of a therapist (if needed).

I am happy to support others and I do frequently. I absolutely reach out if it's felt needed.

This thread is highlights a divide in thinking and has been useful to read.

This is just the "suffer in silence or you're not really suffering" shit that discourages people from seeking help until it's too late.

This, is exactly the mentality of some nasty, back and ignorant people on this thread. You've nailed it. Strange how we talk about suicide, R U OK day, etc. Yet when someone posts a clear cry for help, they are accused of 'seeking attention' (which, if you are suicidal is what you should be doing anyway, seeking help/attention).

These same backward, bilious troglodytes would then say "why didn't we know?" if someone close to them suicided.

The point is these 'people' don't want to know, they have no humanity or human warmth or decency. They are, in effect, seeking attention themselves by proxy by judging others for daring to ask for help.

Exactly.

There is still so much ignorance and lack of awareness around mental health issues, so much disablism. This thread shows how deeply uneducated and ignorant people are.

Actually it's not always the case.

I never post things like that, but a few years ago, in the middle of a breakdown I did. I cringe when I think about it now, but thankfully people realised how out of character it was for me and reached out.

Fucking hell. Sone of the replies on here are so upsetting to read. Really horrible.

@siriusblackcat you have no reason whatsoever to cringe, I'm glad you received positive help.

To echo others, absolutely not true. Had my own mental health battles over the years (diagnosed, medicated and hospitalised at points so not just a little unhappy) and at my lowest points posting these kind of quotes or poems etc were the only way to express my feelings when I could not find my words myself.

And now working with young teens I don't think there is anything more demanding to MH than being dismissed as attention seeking. If they need attention, particularly when out of character like this, then that is concerning in itself not something to ignore as "immature"!