Leave 16yr old to party while we're away overnight?

[Lors72]

16yr old SS wants to have a group of friends in our backyard pub on a Saturday night. Numbers not clear.
SS asked knowing we're away on an overnight & in response to
us asking SS to come watch the dogs as we're away until following day.
I've said NO. Husband said YES. He tends to never refuse his kids requests.
But no adults present for a group of teens in a pub & empty house for 24hrs not on.
Am I being mean?

Seriously, as @Thingamebobwotsit said ,the gatecrashers, just another level of what the fuck just happened to my house?

Not a chance. Parent of 16 year old recently at his first party WITH other parents on site. Absolute carnage.

He did throw them out but it took a while. Thankfully DS and his close friends bottled it and didn't go

I'm the step mum in this and the first time I've really put my foot down. Have 3 SS 16, 18, 20. Imagine my challenges
Thanks for all your responses. Glad I'm not just being a party pooper

Of course you are not being mean.
And your husband is a tool if he thinks this is acceptable and will go well.

No op! Don't do it! ! My sister is still coming across red sticky stains in her house weeks later from all the Cinzano Rossi sicked up by my nephew's friends.

We did it. 😬 After GCSEs, we trusted our 16 year old and friends with our house for a weekend. It was fine.

Wow. Your username is very appropriate 😂

Backyard pubs - aka a shed tricked out with optics & possibly badly stored kegs - are a bit of a daft lockdown project.

It's never going to be the easiest way to hand your guest a drink, but, well, people did do this sort of thing during lockdown.

Still absolutely no reason to let teenagers party without being home.

My 14yo is lovely. She's also friends with the idiot in her year who turned up drunk to a nice 15th birthday party for a dozen kids this week, scaled the party house balcony, pissed on the dancing crowd from above, & was then punched by the birthday girl's elder brother.

Police arrived & arrested both (dd feels this was overkill 🤨). They were very critical of the fact that no actual adults were on site - older brother is 17 & was left nominally in charge.

Or the police might just not turn up. They're over stretched. Then your shed 'pub' gets trashed, or your house gets trashed, or a fight breaks out & no one stops it.

I wouldn't - & I am very relaxed about teenage guests/sleepovers normally, have dealt with the occasional worse for wear teenager, & lose no sleep at all over a bit of a gathering at my house.

It's an entirely different vibe without the householder on site. Don't. REALLY don't.

Don't be daft.😂

If you're lucky you'll come home to a complete mess, all your booze gone and your SS miserable with a hangover and full of remorse. If you're unlucky you could get a call on Monday from someone like me at their School because word has gotten round that a bunch of kids were drinking in your house unsupervised and someone was accidentally injured, or a girl was sexually assaulted, or one of them took a dodgy pill and is in hospital, or a fight has broken out and someone's Mum has involved the police...just a few things off the top of my head that have happened at house parties and I've had to deal with the aftermath.

Where will the 18 & 20 year old SS's be? Are they responsible enough to supervise or would they be more drunk than the 16 year olds?

I have had teenagers. Your DH is insane.

Nooooo

Oh man that's a complete nightmare

I would rather have my 10 yr old daughter stay and supervise them all. Not bad boys. Just daft. And a potential for gatecrashers

Pmsl hell would freeze over before I'd let this happen, I've seen the consequences too many times.

Ha ha I have a 15 and 16 year old and there’s absolutely no way.

the 16 year old is really sensible, the 15 year old not so much but regardless word gets around and there would be gatecrashers.

Hell no! dd had a party (without our permission). Word got out, it got seriously out of hand, she's never been so scared in her life.

You've got a couple of big problems though. Firstly, SS now knows you're going to be away and he may just decide to have a 'little' party anyway.
Or he may be excited and have already invited people.
It's difficult to put the genie back in the bottle.

Honestly (having faced the aftermath, including nightmares about how it might have been even worse) I would cancel my plans and be at home that night.

Do you have any idea what 16 year old boys are like? Let alone the inevitable older gate crashers!

3 step sons, a pub and a Disney dad? I think I'd be cancelling my plans to go away for the next 10yrs!

Why didn't DSS wait to get the ok from you too or does he think it's his dad's house so his permission is all that's needed? Also why would your husband say yes without consulting you, does your opinion not matter as much as his kids getting what they want?

Hit it on the nose. No need to consult me about anything when they've got Daddy Warbocks saying yes to everything. Our garden pub trend cost A LOT of money.
😡

Do you have a pub in your backyard?

Erm how would the op police this if she's not there?

Sorry didn't RTFT 🤣