AIBU to think that people who put Christmas decorations up super early are just attention seekers?

[HahBumhug]

My neighbour has had her house decorated fully for Christmas now for almost two weeks- they started going up on Oct 31st. Fully lit tree in the window, outdoor lights, Christmas wreath on the door- the works.

She’s done this since she moved next door to me five years ago and I assume she did it before that too.

Since I’ve known her, she’s also posted on Insta and her WhatsApp status each year on either Christmas Day or the 26th to show her decorations coming down and a general “I can’t spend another minute looking at them” message.

If she put them up at Christmas and not at Halloween, she wouldn’t be looking at them for all that long.

She’s one of these “I’m daft me” types.

I know there are some exceptions where decorations are put up for different reasons like someone with a terminal illness, a family celebrating early before someone emigrates etc. but those are rare so I’m not factoring then into my thoughts around this.

Am I being unreasonable for thinking that someone who put Christmas decorations up at the end of Oct/early Nov is attention-seeking?

My decs have gone up this weekend as I'm teetering on the brink of my 5th miscarriage and I need something to focus on and cheer myself up. We have this weekend free then 'stuff' on every weekend after this until mid Feb!

Your post doesn't even make sense. And I am offering my opinion on the topic of the thread, not whinging.

I don’t think attention seeking as such. I just raise an eyebrow. I do think it’s ridiculous taking them down on Boxing Day. If you hadn’t put them up so bloody early, you wouldn’t be sick of them already.

For whoever asked is it sad to be excited about Xmas.....in November, yes it is! If like a neighbout of mine, you put your decs up in October, it's beyind sad.
There are 3 year olds with more self control.

For some people, "normal" doesn't mean "bearable". Some people's "normal" is shit.

But even if it isn't...who bloody cares? If someone wants to decorate early, what on earth is it to you? It's not a mark of their character, ffs. It just means they want to put their decorations up. It's not a moral issue.

It isn't doing anyone any harm, is her choice, her house and if it beings her joy why not? Live your own life by your own rules and stop being so critical of others, it comes across as very mean spirited. My tree and decs go up in December, but I don't judge or criticise others timescales.

Yes you’re being unreasonable. You don’t know her that well to know what’s going on behind closed doors or in her head. All of you being negative about the personality of this stranger…

What attention is this supposed to be courting anyway? Do people knock on doors to comment on decorations? Contact the press?

I'm so sorry, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. Sending love ❤️

Mine are going up this week, but it's certainly not attention-seeking - no one can really see them except me, unless they go out of their way to peer into my house. I spend Christmas alone these days and I have spent the last few years attempting to create my own traditions, and make Christmas something that I can love again because, having lost all my family, I had more or less given up on the whole thing. I used to LOVE Christmas and then suddenly found myself hating it and dreading it. So I decided I needed to either go all out and re-create it for me or be utterly miserable every year (because lets face it, it's hard to avoid one way or another).

So I splurged on an artificial - but rather expensive and fabulous tree and decorations, I have researched how professional tree decorators do things and I actually spend a lot of time on it, so I want to actually enjoy my efforts and it seems a waste to spend so much time on it only to take it down a couple of weeks later. I have some other bits I put up - I don't go crazy, I make the tree the focus - but I enjoy it and I love how cosy it makes my house feel for a few weeks. It also reminds me of my late Dad who loved Christmas, and I get a lot of comfort from that.

My "new Christmas" has been a work in progress, adding new ideas and traditions each year but I'd say this year it's the closest I've got to what feels like a proper lovely Christmas that is mine, that has it's own special traditions and that I am looking forward to.

If putting up Christmas decorations before December isn't your thing then that's fine - I respect anyone's choice of when they put them up (if they put them up at all), but as someone who went from absolutely LOVING Christmas and having big Christmas celebrations - to wanting to crawl into a hole and pretend it wasn't even happening (something I never expected to ever feel like) - I refuse to judge anyone's choices around how they celebrate Christmas or when they put up their decorations. I know only too well that putting up the decorations may actually have taken a lot of effort (emotionally) and if someone who is feeling sad for whatever reason suddenly gets the urge to put up their decorations in November and it makes them smile, then I say good on em!

You don't know what is going on in people's lives. I knew someone who was terminally ill and wasn't going to make it to Christmas, but they wanted to have one last one because they loved Christmas - so they did it in October. I know people always criticise the shops for having Christmas stuff on sale early but for people who may want/need to celebrate a little early for whatever reason, it's a good thing.

Every year there is this debate over when is too early etc... and it ranges from people who want to put their decorations up v early to people who are throwing a tree up on Christmas Eve. It's horses for courses - do what makes you happy - but judging others for their choices is a bit pointless. You have no idea why they may be putting decorations up early and with everything that has gone on in the world the last few years, if putting up decorations early gives someone a little cheer then I'm certainly not going to criticise that.

The last few years have been pretty tough for lots of people so now I think 'why not?' If it's cheering people up and giving them a few extra weeks to enjoy the Christmas cheer, that's a good thing isn't it?

But then I have a tendency to leave the Christmas fun stuff until it's too late, and then don't get around to it at all. I'm hoping to celebrate more this year.

I don't think it's attention seeking, it's more a sense of people who are rushing to the next thing before it's time rather than living in the present.

It seems such a shame because the inevitability is that indeed they are sick of the sight of them by actual Christmas day and can't wait to get rid of them. Someone I know puts her tree up in November. This year it was 1st November! Then she rips it all down on the evening of Christmas day saying she's sick of the clutter and Christmas is over. I've had a few conversations with her about it over the years. I usually work right up to Christmas Eve and take annual leave between Christmas and New year. That is a really special time to do more Christmas things that we haven't had the chance to fit in before work/school/clubs finish. Family visits and present swapping, going to other towns around us to see the lights, panto, winter wonderland ... It's definitely still Christmas for us (as well as traditionally correct - part of the twelve days of Christmas). She really doesn't get it though, perhaps because she doesn't work so she's been doing Xmas stuff with her kids for weeks by then.

November has its own traditions: bonfire night, remembrance day, the setting in of late autumn, stir up sunday, and in our family two birthdays, then (half American husband) Thanksgiving weekend. No decorations go up until after Thanksgiving and until advent has begun!

Who said it was a moral issue?

It's just behaviour that many people find bloody silly and annoying.

Why do so many people take disagreement as an assertion that disagreement isn't allowed?

You did, when you accused them of "whining" about struggling in cold, dark times and deemed them "snowflakes who just can't deal with ordinary non exciting periods in life". And the OP, with the tiresome old "attention seeking" crap. Plus loads of other posters.

It's not a moral issue. It's not a mark of someone's character. This is ridiculous.

I don’t really understand it to be honest. By Christmas I’d be sick of the sight of them (which this neighbour seems to be). You wouldn’t take cakes to work and declare it’s your birthday in two months time so have a cake now. 🤷‍♀️

I don’t really understand it to be honest.

What are you struggling with?

I guess the build up is better than the actual (borefest) day and that is why people put them up early, drag out the anticipation?

Personally I don't get Christmas, so if the kids want to decorate we do it at the end of term/ by Christmas Eve. Nothing stays up for long as we don't have the room/ have other celebrations to tart the house up for.

To the posters who say it just cheers them up, what about the many people who find Christmas a sad and distressing time? People who are bereaved, have no one to spend Christmas with, or no money to buy Santa presents?
They already face a difficult December every year. Now they're expected to have constant in your face reminders as soon as Halloween is over because you can't just wait until December to light up your garden and stick your Christmas tree in the window.
And shops should wait until the beginning if December as well.
People need to just calm down about Christmas. It used to be special and meaningful. Now it's rapidly becoming a greedy, frantic and tacky spendfest.

I live in the middle of nowhere no neighbours. Pretty sure I’m not putting mine up early for attention. Unless maybe I’m trying to impress the sheep or chickens?!

I agree

2023istheyear.
Apologies I've no idea why I quoted your post. My response is not directed at you specifically.

Do you understand what the word 'moral' means?

I really dislike that 'attention seeking' sneeriness around those who don't do things the 'normal' way. Other people doing things differently is not about you, OP.
That said, I totally get the confusion about why anyone would put up decorations before mid November if they're likely to be sick of the sight of them by Boxing Day. But hey. They're not my decorations.

I’m not a fan of Christmas being mentioned before December. For me the stretching out of Christmas early really spoils it for me. However I don’t care if people put them up, I think it’s a waste of electricity these days though.

I do really really dislike the people who take them down on Christmas Day/Boxing Day and make a big thing about it. Like they are much better than everyone else. To me that quiet week between Christmas and new year IS Christmas. Into January is exactly when you need the extra lights, everyone is skint, there’s nothing to look forward to, it’s cold and dark…yuk