AIBU to not want to go to my work Christmas party?

[TwoTimTams]

Work in a large government organisation. Colleagues are fine, some I know reasonably well, others I haven’t said more than hello to once or twice.

Our work Christmas party is at one of our other locations a 1 hour drive away. Work is paying. I don’t want to go, it’s outside my normal work hours as an early dinner. I will be there anyway due to having to attend a team event earlier that day but I don’t want to stay for the party. I dislike social situations particularly in a work environment, and while I don’t mind going out to the odd quick lunch with my workmates the politics of a work Christmas party are tedious and I can’t be arsed with it.

But people seem to love their work Christmas parties, I figure I must be weird and in the minority otherwise we wouldn’t be having them. Does everyone else actually LIKE their work Christmas party?

AIBU - I’m being boring and work Christmas parties are a social calendar highlight in permanent marker

YANBU - work Christmas parties are a form of torture, so yeah nah, washing my hair instead

I always did as well. I was normally booked up for every weekend from late November before the end of September. The work’s do could be any of the first three weekends in December and a Friday or Saturday, so there was no way I was keeping December free just incase.

I didn’t of course say I had far better things to do, just I was fully booked up and not able to attend.

Had things been organised earlier…but they were not.

Just say you can’t make it. I’ve had some really brilliant ones with a particular company where everyone knew each other fairly well as there was always lots of talking and joking going on at work, and some excruciating ones with other companies where no one much really talked to each other in the office and they just felt so uncomfortable and awful, so I always made an excuse not to go afterwards.

1. eat the meal then leave.
2. book a day off (flexi?)
3. make sure you're the sober one with the camera it's more fun after christmas

Wow. I didn't know it's French exit. In Polish it's English exit 😅

@xogossipgirlxo Brexit then?! 🤷🏻‍♀️

Guessing op means civil service.

I can’t imagine any government department would spend taxpayers money on their staff Christmas do. Certainly not one I ever worked for.

Such a binary choice. Don't go if you don't want to. Don't make a song and dance, just say "not attending" if they ask you to tick a box on an invitation, or if you have to reply just say "I won't be attending, i hope you all have a lovely time" and just leave it.

I've been to absolutely stellar work christmas parties in the past, really fun, really good food, drink, dancing and fun. I've been to others that were stilted boring shit, and I've left early. Nobody really cares. Those who have fun don't want a fun-sponge sitting in the corner so it's a win-win.

But. They can be good for networking, and it is often helpful to know your colleagues a bit outside of the work setting. It greases the corporate wheels a lot of the time, and if that's the kind of place you work, i always recommend going with a bit of an excuse ready to leave early if it's really awful.

This ^^ exactly what I would do.

I used to go and try and make the effort to look as if it was all good fun. Often would be keen to get home. It worked out expensive taxi there and back plus the meal. Then I started to book other things that night. Then I decided that no one would miss me, not a big drinker or dancer a bit fat and frumpy so probably better of without me. Quite a relief always said no thank you.

I really dislike work Xmas parties and decided a few years ago not to go to any more, so now I just say I’m really sorry I can’t make it/can’t afford it/can’t find anyone to look after the dog etc etc.

Can’t stand works dos and stopped going years ago.

Its always the same boozy night on the town. Nothing has changed in 20 years. I’d be happy with a meal and a glass of wine but nope it has to be a pub crawl.

Yuk.

I used to enjoy them when I was in my 20's, now I'm in my 40's I can't be bothered. Takes far too much out of my evenings, which I'd rather spend sorting DC's stuff out for school the next day, family dinner, followed by bed at 9pm! So I just say I can't make it. It's never an issue.

Thanks for your feedback everyone. I had no idea so many felt the same about their work Christmas parties, so it’s made me feel better about not liking them myself to know I’m not such a weird introvert after all.

I’m not in the UK and we don’t usually get paid Christmas parties but this one has been tagged into the end of a team building day so maybe that’s why. Plus there’s been nothing for the past two years because of covid.

I’m definitely not going. 😁

I’m quite social but I’m not overly keen on big team Christmas nights out. We always have to pay ourselves too, so it’s £50 easily and if you get stuck next to someone you’re not keen on then it’s not a great evening. I’d rather be in watching TV to be honest, or on my own night out with a couple of selected friends / colleagues

I’m a civil servant and we definitely don’t get a Christmas night out paid for. We can’t even order sandwiches or biscuits for a meeting let alone pay for a meal for the whole department. Certainly not a good use of tax payers money

Literally not a chance I would go to a work Christmas party at the moment. I have never been especially keen on them but with all the viruses flying around at the moment I would rather stay well for the things I actually want to do.

I don't go to mine. Years and years ago I went to a works do, got so pissed I was lying on the floor, poured a drink over a good customer and got fired the on Monday.

So I've never been to a works do since!! 😂

Nah really not my thing!
It really pisses me off when people go on and on to pressure you to attend the Christmas party.
I'm a quiet person, you won't even notice my lack of attendance.

I'm not doing my hair. I'm picking up the dog from the groomers...

I usually don't want to go to mine but end up going for appearances sake and one of two things happens:

1. I stay for the meal and then slope off to bed (we are allowed a hotel even if local)
2. I stay for the meal and "just one drink", end up enjoying myself and find I'm still out playing drinking games at 2am and then having to run around whichever city to find a bag of rice because someone's dropped her phone in the toilet.

My work Xmas do is just my fairly small department and we all have lots of fun together.

I'd hate it if it were the wider company.

Just see it as part of the job and either go home after dinner or sneak off to the bar with a genuine work friend !

Just don't go. I'm not going to mine its some game and then dinner u can do both or one or the other but either way I'd rather spend my money on something else. Previous times I've been the good is mediocre at best and its £40 this year so no thank you.

My colleague has refused to go to her in-laws' annual gathering because she wants to go to our Christmas party instead 😂

For the record, I bloody love Christmas parties. I totally understand many people don't but it's like their total dismissal of them gives them some sort of superior standpoint where the party goers are the scum of the earth.

I agree I hate work socials with avengence
I've paid a £15 deposit for ours but I'd rather loose it than go so I'll be feeling poorly on the day

I'd rather loose £15 than spend an evening in total misery and have to spend more on taxi's, drinks, an outfit etc. Plus the balance is £25 for the ticket

I'd rather not bother - I paid the deposit as I didn't want them thinking I wasn't a team player but I really cannot think of anything worse x