He will clean me out won't he....

[triangularprisms]

I hope to divorce soon.Husband had an affair and left us three years ago.Kids with me 90 percent of time.He pays my half of mortgage plus 30 pounds per week maintenance for three kids.He agreed to pay extras eg education,driving lessons, therapies for SN kids.He hasn't.He either got fired or made redundant from his last job.He has now set up his own business and regularly has wads of 50's and 100's in his wallet, he shows kids. He does a lot of cash jobs eg building/plumbing etc. My eldest child asked him to contribute towards a car that she is saving for.He refused otelling her that as he is paying the full mortgage for 'me', maintenance and renting his own place at a cost of 350 pounds per month, that he lives from hand to mouth from month to month.The same man wears designer clobber and has had 4 foreign holidays in the last year . I earn 60,000 per year and it is not enough to raise my children .Granted, I have a car loan,a personal loan and a long distance commute and cover all christmas/birthday /education expenses. His contribution value is worth 500 per month as we have a very small mortgage. I have paid massively into a pension all my working life.He doesnt have one. Iam also a part owner of an inherited property..a fifth is mine... Will he be entitled to this too.. I have an awful feeling that despite him not seeing kids, paying such a miniscule amount relative to their outgoings and very probably hiding money, that I am going to lose out badly and I cannot afford to as I need to educate my kids in the future.The whole system seems so unfair.

Would you accept £50 for it? Cost of living n all that.

Aaahhh!
so to add to my last post, she’s got a net income of around £3.5 k per month with NO housing costs!

It doesn’t matter what the OP has coming in surely, it’s still valid that the father contributes to his kids surely?

Don't worry HMRC are worse than useless so there's no risk.

If he is paying the full mortgage plus some CM, then he IS contributing to the kids. She says the value of this is £500 a month.

He’s paying for the roof over their heads + £350 a month. Isn’t that enough?

Surely he does though as he's paying the full mortgage plus giving her extra cash?

I sensed bullshit at "designer clobber". Who talks like that?

I mean, he could stop paying the OP's half of the mortgage and give her that money as his contribution to the kids.

Yeah claim benefits OP you'll be loads better off on universal credit than you will on your 60K a year salary

Someone on £20k with 3 DC will be entitled to UC and CB.

It is possible someone with disabled DC on £60k will also qualify for UC, so the government recognise in that circumstance it isn’t enough. We have a higher household income but because of disabled DC we would qualify if we didn’t have savings.

You have a lot to say on his finances despite the fact that you apparently can’t live on 60 grand a year despite a small mortgage most of which you don’t pay anyway. People get by on raising kids alone on a third of your income. 🙄

This is bollocks.

@triangularprisms

Tricky situation but it could be worse

Me and my partner don't earn £60k between us!!!

@Lerk has nailed it.

Op may be in Scotland where £100 notes are a thing.

Yeah - give up your £60K job “for benefits”.
🙄
Don’t be a dick. Zero sympathy for you now.
If you didn’t want to lose so such equity and pension to him - why didn’t you divorce him 3 years ago?
You married him, that has consequences that you chose.
Find a competent solicitor who will argue now that you should get a disproportionate share of assets because you’re housing the children.

He’s not paying the full mortgage - half, and it’s a low amount and £30 per week, hardly a lot of money. It’s irrelevant how much OP earns. I earn 60k, my kids dad earns more than double, should he not bother paying as I earn a decent amount? He’s probably not even paying 1/2 of what he should.

Which is low for 3 kids, when he earns a lot

Try again. He pays the OPs half of the mortgage, as well as his own. Paying both halves means he's paying it in full. I despair at how many people are incapable of reading and understanding even the most basic things.

My god if you’re not on benefits on mumsnet or working for minimum wage you’re not allowed any problems. You wouldn’t think education, training or well paid jobs were available in the UK from the way most mums-netters go on. Who do you think pays your working tax credits and child benefit… tax payers earning decent salaries.
Get legal advice OP. He sounds like a shit.

He’s not paying the full mortgage - half, and it’s a low amount and £30 per week, hardly a lot of money.

What part of this are you failing to understand? It’s over £1000 a.month.

He pays my half of mortgage plus 30 pounds per week maintenance for three kids.

this site seems ot be full of rich people who think they are skint lol

Or Australian

They are indeed and apparently legal tender in all of the UK as well , can see the checkout person's face if i tried to pay with one in Tesco though