To give people second hand gifts

[GADDay]

Please be honest. Is this a really crap thing to do.

The gifts are good quality, in exceptional condition and if bought new, would cost £100's.

I would prefer to receive repurposed or second hand. So a bit biased.

Fair enough - that's your opinion.

I disagree about stinginess though. Have a look at this concept. It's all about generosity.

buynothingproject.org/about

Well, having more than enough of everything you need should make not buying new things a lot easier.

I often give second hand presents and regift. Sometimes, it is actually more thoughtful to do this as it shows that you know the recipient well by giving them something to do with their interests that unavailable new. It gives the gift a uniqueness and l am always very touched when someone has done this for me.

Because, in my head, I’d know it was second hand and it would make me feel incredibly uncomfortable having it in my house. I have issues surrounding second hand stuff as a result of growing up in poverty. I just don’t want it in my home. I’d rather go without.

I think it's fine to regift unopened presents or something vintage or antique. I wouldn't pass on something obviously opened or used a few times.

@Sn0tnose how do you know if something is secondhand or not?
I said upthread about seeing a book in a charity shop the other day. In perfect new condition a copy of a book only released a few weeks ago. Presumably bought, read and passed on fairly quickly.
If you said you would love a copy of the latest book by your favourite author how do you know whether the giver got it from Waterstones, the supermarket or maybe even....shock horror....a charity shop.

Exactly. I think most of us do have FAR more than we need. It's a shift in thinking, sure.

I can't see a downside to be honest.

Going back to gifts, as I said, I am only buying for immediate family. They all know me and will get me gorgeous things that are not new, so I don't have to worry about the dynamic of giving and receiving.

I have enough but I wouldn't say more than enough, two sets of towels, two of bedlinen, a pack of teatowels and so on. Neither of us use cosmetics. Few things like that need replacing yearly.

Yes, would absolutely be happy with second hand presents, would prefer them. There's enough stuff in the world, much better than buying new. You only have to look on vinted to see how much unwanted shit is knocking around.

I'm trying to show dc that second hand is better, though its harder as they're getting older and want very specific things. I just don't understand why some people are so against it. I don't buy other people second hand outside immediate family, except friends/ family I know are happy with this, but I wish it was more socially acceptable.

Because I only really exchange gifts with my DH, a couple of friends and in laws. In laws always do money and vouchers, one friend always bakes my gift and my DH and best friend know me well enough to know how much it would upset me. They love me. I trust them not to do it to me.

maybe even....shock horror....a charity shop I do understand what I sound like. But, to me, second hand stuff means other people’s dirty, holey old crap, bugs, etc. So you can look down your nose at me as much as you like and think I’m being ridiculous. I genuinely don’t give a shit. I don’t want other people’s crap.

@Sn0tnose I understand you obviously have some issues about secondhand stuff but modern charity shops don't sell old "dirty, holey old crap". A lot of stuff donated is as new, never been used etc.
Giving something to a charity shop doesn't mean it's unwanted "crap" - it can be something that is just no longer needed or with books just been read once, not going to be read again, so passed on.
But of course if you are uncomfortable with getting secondhand then I understand why you don't want it.

People selling things that are new with tags online - I'd be worried they were shoplifted.

Charity shops in more affluent areas tend to have better stuff in them. It’s not so a lot of the time in less well off areas. People don’t have a lot of brand new/ lightly used things of decent quality to give away. If they had those sorts of things they would probably sell them instead of donating. In my local charity shops, it’s all crappy ornaments and shrunken Primark clothes and broken kids toys.
To some, second hand means handbags off eBay, a dress off vinted, nice clean hand me downs from people they know. To others it’s heavily used stuff that’s been donated that was crap in the first place. If you’ve ever had to root through charity shops hoping against hope to find a winter coat that fits or for things like a school bag or shoes or a decent Christmas present for your kids, your attitude to buying second hand is obviously going to be less enthusiastic than for someone who already has most of the stuff they need and can see it as a novelty.

Same.

Not sure I agree.

When I was a child, about 10 or 11,there was an old lady who was friends with my parents. Can't remember much about her really but I imagine she had to watch the pennies. My parents had got her a small gift so she reciprocated with a present for me. She obviously knew I was a bookworm because she gave me one of her own books. It was a lovely harback book brought out to commemorate the coronation of George VI. I was delighted with it at the time and still have it now. I am 60. So I absolutely think second hand books can be a good gift if carefully chosen

They are more likely to be impulse sale purchases, dresses bought with the intention of slimming into them (and we all know how that goes...), unwanted gifts or simply being sold out of necessity before the owner has had a chance to wear them.

Tallulah: "Shoes, underwear/ hosiery, nightwear, towels, tea towels, bed linen, cosmetics, paper, anything medicinal, cookware..."
I have acquired all of the above as second hand items at various points, and it's absolutely fine. What could actually go wrong with a second hand tea towel? I am still using my granny's lovely tea towels, and she's been dead for 25 years.
My friend gave me 5 pairs of 'postpartum knickers' when DC1 was born, some of her old but perfectly servicable ones as she, quite rightly, suggested I wouldn't want to mess up my nice underwear.
My set of Le Creuset pans and gratin dishes had been left on a wall outside someone's house; a quick clean and that set will last me for life.
Any idea of "ick" should be offset by the brilliant environmental and economic benefits of second hand appreciation.

No , I buy a lot of second hand but unless it’s something really expensive and with that persons prior understanding I would not buy second hand gifts . At least not to those outside our household

I understand how you feel.

I love secondhand/vintage, etc and my favorite store in the world is a used bookstore. I was raised in a WC, skint family. Born in a council house. My kids are being in raised by parents whose income is in the top 10%. I am very conscious of my changed circumstances and get pleasure from not raising my kids the way I was. That said, I use Buy Nothing regularly and pride myself on buying used, including my kids clothes.

My mother, on the other hand, was raised in real poverty and wouldn't be seen in a charity shop. Literally refused to come in one with me, and complained bitterly when I used her gift money to buy my daughter a second hand jacket (Ralph Lauren vintage tweed for $14!!!) She has a lot of "baggage" tied up in her childhood living circumstances and would rather go without that be thought to be wearing used.
i find it frustrating as anything but I'm trying to have compassion for her.

if its something they want sure!! last Christmas my sister ended up with a bunch of lemax Halloween pieces. She buys me second hand books most years. I perfer used books cause you can get more for your money

I wouldn’t like second hand gifts. I think the obvious way to reduce stuff is no gifts. You can also gift experience : tickets, cinema card or invite people for dinner or babysit. I don’t use many expensive things and when I use them I prefer them to be new, in a box, with instruction and guarantee. I don’t support the concept of buying second hand personally so I wouldn’t like you imposing your opinions on me.

I’ve got some second hand furniture from BHF shop and used to buy DD toys in charity shops when she was little but it’s something that should be my decision not yours. So if you offer buying me something I want from a charity shop or somewhere else I would tell you just not bother with the present. And yes, I would think that you were cheap because you could just buy me small box of chocolates and make me happy.

Some of my nicest shoes are second hand! My best bargain to date is a pair of vintage Manolo Blahniks picked up from a Canadian pawn shop for £26. Most of my clothes are from eBay.
I do draw the line at knickers.

I don’t support the concept of buying second hand personally so I wouldn’t like you imposing your opinions on me.

Thats one of the most batshit ridiculous statements I've ever read on here, @Arenanewbie. How can you possibly "not support" reusing? WTF is wrong with you?

Some of the replies on this thread 🙄

It wouldn't bother me one bit. If people haven't got the message yet that we need to STOP producing useless junk, there's no hope.

There's enough stuff already. Secondhand, repurposed, regifted, whatever. That's exactly how it should be for everyone. If we carry on producing pointless crap to satisfy people's need for a 'new gift,' then the next generation will be even more screwed than they already are.

How utterly tone deaf for people to be sniffy about 'new.'

I've told everyone who is likely to buy me anything to NOT buy anything. A secondhand book is brilliant. Homemade jam, lovely. Just not new, pointless crap.

I'm not on the fence here

@alanabennett I think I put it wrongly, I do support it and re use things but I think it should be personal choice so I should be asked if I’m ok with this for presents e.g if my sister offers to buy me a bread maker as Xmas gift I will assume it’s new. If she means not she should ask me if I’m ok with it.