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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that women without children should be able to take time off work too?

1000 replies

Playfair · 31/10/2022 18:45

Firstly I will say that I am 100% supportive of good maternity leave (and paternity / shared), and understand the importance of supporting women to maintain a career, care for children or whatever else they wish.

I also acknowledge that maintaining birth rates is critical for society. And that maternity leave is spent doing work in raising a child.

Reflecting on my company's good maternity policy (about 6 months paid) and also some other institutions that have announced paid time off for those undergoing fertility treatment, it leaves me wondering about those of us without children (by choice or otherwise).

I'm in my thirties and will never have children. I'd love to have a small amount of paid time off (in addition to usual annual leave) to do some lengthy travel for example. I can't see why we can't have access to something similar if you haven't used any maternity benefit by a certain point.

There would obviously be benefits for society & business from developing new skills, morale etc. As well as women in work contributing to economy and through taxation.

So,

YABU - Women who choose not to have children shouldn't be entitled to anything else

YANBU - Women should be able to claim a small amount of extra paid time off if they stay in a career and contribute to business and societies success

OP posts:
Dappledapples · 31/10/2022 18:46

Can you take a sabbatical?

Itloggedmeoutagain · 31/10/2022 18:47

This is what holidays are for
Take your annual leave if you want to travel

ErrolTheDragon · 31/10/2022 18:47

I'd love to have a small amount of paid time off (in addition to usual annual leave) to do some lengthy travel for example.

Wouldn't we all.Confused

beonmywaythen · 31/10/2022 18:48

Maternity leave isn't a holiday. I spent most of my maternity leave recovering from major surgery. We populating the planet it's not for fun.

2reefsin30knots · 31/10/2022 18:48

Why just women?

MintJulia · 31/10/2022 18:48

Yes, I thought that too. Ask your employer if you can take a sabbatical.

But bear in mind, 40% of mothers suffer discrimination, regardless of the maternity laws. Check with Pregnant then Screwed.

So expect the same !

ErrolTheDragon · 31/10/2022 18:48

What on earth is your justification for only child free women getting a free holiday?

WorkerBeeeee · 31/10/2022 18:50

I agree with you.
Why can you take 6 months off paid to look after a baby but not, say, to look after your elderly/dying parents?

Looneytune253 · 31/10/2022 18:51

What?!? This isn't even comparable seriously!!

WorkerBeeeee · 31/10/2022 18:51

Everyone (male/female) should get 2 lots of "paid leave" of 6 months. What they do with it is up to them.

loopyb · 31/10/2022 18:51

YANBU - I've often thought this is unfair but I think it'd be too hard to manage.

The same would have to be offered to men too. And I think you would need to have been at a work place for a dedicated amount of time (5-10 years minimum). And unless you're physiologically unable to have children, what is there to stop you changing your mind at a later date?

Singleandproud · 31/10/2022 18:52

Think of maternity leave more like sick leave, being pregnant and giving birth takes a massive toll on your body and it takes much longer for it to go back to normal than most think.

You have the choice of taking a sabbatical, or move to a school based role and get the long summer holiday off.

InBlue · 31/10/2022 18:52

Lots of companies have this already, where if you have e.g. two years service you can take a 6 month sabbatical. Do you think it should be government funded?

Why should it just be available to childless women?

Maternity leave is not a holiday or a “break from work”, it’s just different, usually harder work.

ChilliBandit · 31/10/2022 18:52

Maternity leave is not a holiday. Mine was harder than going to work everyday.

Myleakycauldron · 31/10/2022 18:53

I thought this was going to be about sharing popular annual leave times eg. Christmas between women with children and without and was already to vote YANBU. Butttt you can't just have paid time off from work for no reason (ie. a sabbatical) maternity leave is not a holiday!

AnneTwacky · 31/10/2022 18:53

How about you get the time off but to keep it fair an alarm goes of every 3 hours for you to leave whatever you're doing straight away for half an hour, be it showering, eating your dinner or sleeping.

Just being silly, but wanted to illustrate just how much maternity leave is not a holiday.

RedWingBoots · 31/10/2022 18:53

YABU

I didn't have a child (naturally) until my 40s and for having her I got statutory maternity pay. Luckily my DP is with an employer who gives enhanced parental pay. However we know lots of couples who only get statutory maternity/parental pay.

So if you want to swan off for £156.66 per week for 33 weeks knock yourself out.

Confusednoodle · 31/10/2022 18:54

WorkerBeeeee · 31/10/2022 18:50

I agree with you.
Why can you take 6 months off paid to look after a baby but not, say, to look after your elderly/dying parents?

Lots of companies have this too, carers leave or compassionate leave.

Mummyongin · 31/10/2022 18:54

Maternity leave is not a holiday. Being responsible for a baby is work. And it’s bloody hard. That being said, my aunt didn’t have any children but she took a years sabbatical to write a book. She obviously agreed this with her employer and think it’s a fabulous thing to do. She went travelling a lot but used unpaid leave.

Spicybananas · 31/10/2022 18:54

WorkerBeeeee · 31/10/2022 18:50

I agree with you.
Why can you take 6 months off paid to look after a baby but not, say, to look after your elderly/dying parents?

This I agree with. I had to take quite a lot of time off work to look after my Nan who had dementia and other complex health issues - sometimes very last minute to be with her in A&E or look after her at home. I’m so lucky to work for a company who were very understanding and let me do this, but I learnt of so many people who got told because it wasn’t a child there was nothing they could do and it’d all need to be sick leave or unpaid.

Bellsbeachwaves · 31/10/2022 18:55

Yanbu

In Australia teachers can take one year off every five years and get four years salary spread over that five. They get to return to their jobs after. They can do it every five years if they wish, plenty did. Plus long service leave and all sorts. Such a great idea.

RedHelenB · 31/10/2022 18:55

ErrolTheDragon · 31/10/2022 18:47

I'd love to have a small amount of paid time off (in addition to usual annual leave) to do some lengthy travel for example.

Wouldn't we all.Confused

This. Maternity leave isn't holiday, it's to allow a mother time to recover from her pregnancy and care and bond with her baby

Basecamp · 31/10/2022 18:57

Maybe you should have one of those robotic babies that screams periodically during the day and night and soils itself regularly whilst you take your free holiday. Because I can assure you, maternity leave is not fun.

BagOfBollocks · 31/10/2022 18:57

Why can you take 6 months off paid to look after a baby but not, say, to look after your elderly/dying parents?

Because how would you know they'd be dead by the end of it and if they aren't, what then?

Ilovenotebooks · 31/10/2022 18:57

beonmywaythen · 31/10/2022 18:48

Maternity leave isn't a holiday. I spent most of my maternity leave recovering from major surgery. We populating the planet it's not for fun.

Populating a massively over populated planet. You've made a life choice. Don't pretend you're doing an altruistic thing in populating the planet.

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