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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My husband's pretty awesome

113 replies

BonnyT · 29/10/2022 18:14

I'm new to Mumsnet... so 'hello'!

I'm really sad to see posts from women who have discovered their husband is cheating, or their husband moans when they switch the heating on. I'm pretty sad that there are so many dickhead husbands and partners out there.

I feel kinda like I'm gonna get flack for saying this, but my husband is pretty awesome. He's currently out fishing with our son, he's a fab dad, I still fancy the pants off him - and he pulls his weight around the home.

Is he a freak of nature? I'm trying not to boast here, but he is pretty frickin' awesome - even after 20 years together.

I guess I'm trying to say that there are some great guys out there... is yours one of them?

AIBU for saying this???

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 29/10/2022 18:17

I think a lot of posters in here are married to great men. But people having difficulties with their arsehole men are going to post about it looking for advice. So the balance looks skewed if that makes sense.

I have a good one (with some annoying habits I think a perfect one is hard to come by) 😄

Birdsofafeatherflocktogether · 29/10/2022 18:19

Mine isn’t perfect,in fact I could cheerfully bury him some days but he’s perfect for me
hes a good man-and he loves me
it took a long time for us to meet but as soon as we did,we where tight from day one
hes my rock and I wouldn’t be without him

1000yellowdaisies · 29/10/2022 18:21

Nah defo not being unreasonable ... I'm a single parent and have ranted on here about exH... but i know there are great men out there. Its my dearest wish that both my kids marry great partners and choose better than me.
Happy for you op

SirMoose · 29/10/2022 18:22

Mines awesome. We bicker occasionally but we are best friends. He literally makes me laugh until I cry.

Bywayofanupdate · 29/10/2022 18:23

Mine isn't perfect and has some very annoying habits but he is still pretty damn awesome! He's an amazing dad, will do things around the house and works his arse off for us. I still fancy the pants off him and wonder every day why he does me 😬

cookiecreammmpie · 29/10/2022 18:27

Yeah I've got a lovely husband too. It probably just looks like everyone on here is married to awful men because people tend to post for advice or to offload about their problems. People don't really post about their men doing nice things because it should be a given that they do.

Original poster
BonnyT · 29/10/2022 18:32

I think it's nice to celebrate when you've got a good un!! Don't get me wrong, I could cheerfully strangle him sometimes... but I think he'd happily throttle me too ( hello, mood swimgs and menopausal wife!!)

OP posts:
Original poster
BonnyT · 29/10/2022 18:34

Thanks my lovely!! I did marry a bit of a plank first time round (too young, too stupid for both of us)!!

OP posts:
Wifflywafflywoo · 29/10/2022 18:35

For all I whinge about my DP, it's just trivial. He works his arse off in a stressful job, does any DIY I need, makes me homemade cake when I'm feeling down, he takes DD (5 months) after he finishes work to bath her and put her to bed then cooks us tea. He drives me to and from any trips out I do (I can't drive at the mo due to a health issue) and he tells me I look beautiful every day.

We get married next year and I can't wait.

What a lovely thread to see on here!

Original poster
BonnyT · 29/10/2022 18:35

Love this... a funny guy makes everything feel better. X

OP posts:
Original poster
BonnyT · 29/10/2022 18:36

I love this!!!! Have a fab wedding day... he sounds like a keeper!! Xx

OP posts:
pilates · 29/10/2022 18:37

I have a good one too.

Millsbills · 29/10/2022 18:39

YANBU

but you’ll be shot down by the bitter brigade soon

So many on here say ‘well if not all men were shit why don’t we see posts saying how fab they are’ but on the other hand will dismiss posts like this as being insensitive or goady.

My DH is pretty awesome too, does more than half the housework, we did 50/50 SPL, encourages my career, is an active father, gets on great with my friends and family, cut his mother out of his life the second she said one mean thing about me 13 years ago. Is the type of man who would lie down in a puddle to save me having to walk through it. I don’t know many women irl with shit partners which is great too

Chickpea17 · 29/10/2022 18:39

My husband is absolutely fantastic and a brilliant dad. He can be a bit of a twat sometimes but so can IGrin

BronnauMawrion · 29/10/2022 18:40

Been married 20-odd years. We're both fatter and grayer, but quite happy.
There are times when I make mental plans to finish him off and bury him under the patio, but he's actually a lovely chap and would do anything for me and our children.

PurpleButterflyWings · 29/10/2022 18:44

Awww nice thread @BonnyT

I want to slap my husband silly with a wet fish some days, but for the most part he is OK. He'll do. He can stay. Grin

He can grate some days but he is pretty OK other times, and I am not perfect. We have lots of laughs some days, lots of fun together, and lots of things in common, and over a quarter century together.

Enjoy your Halloween weekend with your lovely husband!!!!! Flowers

PortiasBiscuit · 29/10/2022 18:45

I am paying an insane amount to have surgery on a pet rat, I cannot let her just die, she wants to live so much. DH says, “It is up to me”
He understands, I adore him.

Shitfather · 29/10/2022 18:45

Having been married to a cunt, I do like reading about great men. Not sure I’ll ever meet one again, but it’s good to know they exist. Your happiness is palpable - long may it exist.

RobynNora · 29/10/2022 18:45

Aww. He sounds great!

Mine does all the laundry and dishes and a lot of the cooking. He also stays on top of school stuff and orders children’s clothes when we need them without me asking or supervising. He also sorts out his own social life (after helping me with bedtime) and his side of the family stuff (like birthday admin or meetups). Plus he proactively finds kids’ stuff to do at the weekend to allow me some peace and quiet. Oh and he’s more likely than me to remember to wash towels/change bedsheets every week, put a Tesco order in or reorder wetwipes.

Not to boast but a lot of this is thanks to my feminism. I was very proactive in having lengthy chats about emotional labour and weight pulling before having kids. As a result we both put in our fair share and I’m frequently told how lucky I am. It’s definitely not luck. I just wouldn’t tolerate a sexist relationship!

Original poster
BonnyT · 29/10/2022 18:45

Millsbills · 29/10/2022 18:39

YANBU

but you’ll be shot down by the bitter brigade soon

So many on here say ‘well if not all men were shit why don’t we see posts saying how fab they are’ but on the other hand will dismiss posts like this as being insensitive or goady.

My DH is pretty awesome too, does more than half the housework, we did 50/50 SPL, encourages my career, is an active father, gets on great with my friends and family, cut his mother out of his life the second she said one mean thing about me 13 years ago. Is the type of man who would lie down in a puddle to save me having to walk through it. I don’t know many women irl with shit partners which is great too

I love that you have a good un! Yeah, fully expecting a barrage of abuse... I could cheerfully batter him sometimes... but he's my lobster!!! X

OP posts:
BCBird · 29/10/2022 18:47

Think it is great to hear this. We need to appreciate people. 🙂

PurpleButterflyWings · 29/10/2022 18:47

BonnyT · 29/10/2022 18:45

I love that you have a good un! Yeah, fully expecting a barrage of abuse... I could cheerfully batter him sometimes... but he's my lobster!!! X

Show quote history

Fan of FRIENDS are we? Grin

Youdoyoutoday · 29/10/2022 18:49

My DH is pretty awesome too!! He's my best friend, I love being with him, we laugh every day, hug, kiss, sex is great!

When I go out with some of my friends and they sit there slagging their husbands off, I can't join in!

I'm so glad we found each other!

threegoodthings · 29/10/2022 18:50

Millsbills · 29/10/2022 18:39

YANBU

but you’ll be shot down by the bitter brigade soon

So many on here say ‘well if not all men were shit why don’t we see posts saying how fab they are’ but on the other hand will dismiss posts like this as being insensitive or goady.

My DH is pretty awesome too, does more than half the housework, we did 50/50 SPL, encourages my career, is an active father, gets on great with my friends and family, cut his mother out of his life the second she said one mean thing about me 13 years ago. Is the type of man who would lie down in a puddle to save me having to walk through it. I don’t know many women irl with shit partners which is great too

He cut his mother out the second she said one mean thing about you? So you mean immediately after one instance? His own mother?

That has red flags all over it and not really indicative of a wonderful man

Darkchocolateandcoffee · 29/10/2022 18:51

You are only BU for spelling flak wrong.

My husband's great too. I guess those of us with good ones don't bother posting about them, but my heart goes out to some of the women posting about their crap ones.