To think not everything is ‘misogyny’

[Cuppasoupmonster]

… and that the word is massively overused on here?

I’m getting quite tired of it if I’m honest, it feels like every other conversation the ‘misogyny’ card is whipped out and anyone who disagrees has ‘internalised misogyny’ (um no I just have a different opinion).

It’s becoming the ‘BeKind’ of feminism. Overused to the point it’s getting meaningless and irritating, and just used to ‘win’ any kind of nuanced topic without any proper discussion.

AIBU? 🤷🏼‍♀️

Except for their washing, cooking, taking them to clubs, taking them to pals, keeping up with school stuff - it’s not like they turn thirteen and you wash your hands of them. And it’s very difficult to get back into full time work after over a decade of part time, or unemployment.

@LolaSmiles on the other hand she’s had the luxury of not working FT for years, you can’t say that isn’t a perk…

It's a perk to lose your earnings for the time your children are young, have lower pension contributions when your children are young, be working part time when the children are young whilst your partner gets to build his career and assets, and then in the event a relationship ends your domestic responsibility isn't acknowledged because you've not been clued up enough to insist on a legally binding arrangement that protects you in the event of a split?

Funny how often those sorts of situations occur, and it's funny how often on MN when women point out that marriage isn't just a piece of paper, it's an important legal contract and women should get clued up on it because men sure know how to safeguard themselves financially, they get jumped on.

@LolaSmiles not working FT, getting more time to yourself and at home is definitely a perk. You’re being very disingenuous in making out it’s all about money.

Pumperthepumper
Plus there's quite a lot out there on the concept of the double shift, where an increase in women entering full time employment hasn't correlated with a reallocation of domestic duties. Just that women who work full time end up doing two shifts: one at work and the other carrying the bulk of the household mental load.

Women want change but can't force men to step up.

You’re being very disingenuous pretending that money isn’t a factor. Or lack of work experience as a result. Or then being financially dependent on one person.

@LolaSmiles not working FT, getting more time to yourself and at home is definitely a perk. You’re being very disingenuous in making out it’s all about money
Not disingenuous in the slightest. There's a lot out there on domestic load allocation, women on double shifts and that part time workers are often carrying the bulk of the childcare and domestic work, so don't buy the idea that a woman who has been working part time whilst her children grew up has had all these perks.

Of course it's not surprising that you're still grasping for ways that the poor men are hard done by and that women are so mean to them/should be grateful for anything they get.

7th rule of misogyny: Women should always be grateful to men for everything

@LolaSmiles haha you’re so rude and dramatic!

You are flirting about a lot from topic to topic. Why not pick one for this great debate you’re after? Abortion? Trans rights? Domestic labour and childcare?

Because my thread isn’t about a specific topic. I’ve been asked to give examples and that’s what I’ve done.

Unfortunately this happens with labels, try and raise a legitimate concern based on actual facts, someone says that’s x the debate is shut down.

But this doesn’t mean the problem doesn’t exist but labels can be used to curtail debate.

That being said women have probably been one of the most persecuted groups in history so it’s reasonable to assume this problem has become intergrated into the structure of society, and we see it again and again, most recently, of course in the trans debate where TERF is used as some kind of Mike drop debate curtailer

@LolaSmiles haha you’re so rude and dramatic!

Not at all.

Simply amused at how many topics you want to throw into one thread in a bid to prove that misogyny isn't really that much of a problem, all because you're annoyed that on another thread someone observed your misogyny.

No, you’ve changed track when someone points out the flaws in each particular argument. Nobody is going to knock your door in for thinking women exaggerate about misogyny (unfortunately) but when you start a conversation about it and deflect like this, you start to look foolish. And you can see that yourself, which is why you keep moving the goalposts.

Ok what have I allegedly dodged? I’ll reply to it now.

No, you’ve changed track when someone points out the flaws in each particular argument
Agreed.
And then despite pages of people debating, there were claims that people don't want to debate. But then when people do debate that's proof they're rude.
🤷‍♀️

That money and childcare is a massive factor in women not working full time when they have kids.

That abortion is perfectly valid even if the woman didn’t use contraception.

I cba going back through the thread but those are the ones that immediately spring to mind.

Oh, that contraception is by no means ‘equal’ in any partnership.

I think anybody, who advocates using abortion as contraception, is pretty fucked up.

Why?

Sorry, to be clear, I mean if aborting is being done on a somewhat regular basis. Abortion, per se, is not something I have an issue with. I may have got the wrong end of the stick here???

Regardless, why? What’s the issue?

Of course it’s a massive factor. But they can choose to go back to work FT if they want to.

Where did I say it wasn’t ‘valid’? I said I wouldn’t put any restrictions on it, just that I don’t think holding the view that the rate would go down if women knew it wasn’t there as a fallback.

there we go 🤷🏼‍♀️

I think anybody, who advocates using abortion as contraception, is pretty fucked up
Has anyone advocated for abortions as contraception thought?

My personal opinion is that anyone who is having regular unprotected sex, not using the morning after pill, and then multiple abortions probably has bigger issues in their life than the act of an abortion. That's an issue for that woman and her healthcare providers though, not me.

A woman's right to bodily autonomy matters and as soon as we start saying Woman A's abortion is worthy and it's fine for her but Woman B's abortion isn't because we don't agree with her choices or her reasons for not wanting to be pregnant, were on a slippery slope. Either we believe women have the right to choose whether to continue a pregnancy or we don't.

Honestly I'm from an area that's rough as a dog's tongue. I have literally never, ever come across anyone who uses abortion as contraception. This is not even a thing.

Far more women will have an abortion due to having an existing child with high needs or because the foetus has a life limiting disability, I notice pro lifer women bashers don't really include them in their imaginary hypotheticals.

Am enjoying op still making themselves look supremely foolish though it

@yubgummy

You seriously think men would be incapable of hand washing clothes?!

Like, actually?

🤣