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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to cut my boys hair?

127 replies

Manchestermummax3 · 28/10/2022 15:52

14 month old little boy - his hair is gorgeous! (I know I'm biased) it's a little wild yes, but that's kinda what I love. It doesn't bother him in anyway (not in his eyes etc)

But my god everyone won't stfu making comments that he should have it cut now because people might mistake him for a girl 😒

He still obviously has quite fine 'baby' hair & getting him to sit still long enough would be mission impossible anyway.
His dad wants it cut too & I just don't want to. Neither of us trumps the other in terms of reasons or rights of course.
He wants it cut because he does, I don't want it cut because I don't basically.

We both are basically unreasonable aren't we? 🤣

Also, if any of you lovely lot have some great comebacks when others bring it up please do share! I've seen some of the most brilliant witty responses on other threads!

OP posts:
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6
WallaceinAnderland · 28/10/2022 18:01

RampantIvy · 28/10/2022 17:56

TBH I don't understand the reluctance to cut children's hair. DD was born with a lot of hair that never stopped growing. I cut it regularly because it was getting in her eyes, and washing it was a PITA.

Well, that's a good reason to cut it. Totally different from OP's situation though.

Original poster
Manchestermummax3 · 28/10/2022 18:02

StopGo · 28/10/2022 17:57

My DGS is five and a smidge. He has the most glorious blonde tumbling curls. No one thinks he is a girl and our lovely lad knows exactly who he is.

I think I need to start a thread where we can share pics of our beautiful long haired boys/grandsons/newphews etc 😍

OP posts:
Newuser82 · 28/10/2022 18:04

StoneofDestiny · 28/10/2022 17:12

I mistook a little boy with long hair for a girl today - it was gorgeous hair. The mum said it was always happening! If you are ok with that and he is, there is no problem.

I did the same thing last week. Was mortified!

forgodssnake · 28/10/2022 18:04

He is a small child who can't talk yet. Cutting his hair is going to be a nightmare. and he may be the nervous type which makes cutting it even more difficult.

PenguinLove1 · 28/10/2022 18:13

I was the opposite i enjoyed my little
Boy looking very smart and tidy with his short hair and didnt envy my sisters battles to keep my nieces hair tidy! , i think what parents see as beautiful curly hair is often actually a bit messy and untidy looking and often its coupled with people not wanting their 'baby' to grow up.

Kanaloa · 28/10/2022 18:15

Don’t cut it if you don’t want to. Personally I don’t mind boys having long hair but often (I work with loads of kids) the mums who gush over their boys’ ‘gorgeous wild curls’ actually have boys that look a bit scruffy. I always look critically and think ‘if this was a girl would people be saying it was cute and she was a surfer dude? Or would they just be saying why is that little girl’s hair all over her face and straggly at the bottom etc?’ I kept all my kids’ hair short when they were little and they know if they grow it long it has to be neat and tied back.

7catsisnotenough · 28/10/2022 18:21

Hi OP, maybe leave it to grow and when you decide eventually to cut it donate it to the charity that does wigs for children (?princess trust?) My daughter grew out my DGS (Mumsnet twins!) hair and donated it when it was long enough

Elmo230885 · 28/10/2022 18:23

My boy is three. He has super blonde, super straight hair. I keep his fringe trimmed and have had it cut to keep it just off his shoulders. He is constantly mistakenly called a girl but it doesn't bother me. He is a gorgeous little boy (I realise I'm completely bias). Doesn't help that his name could be for a boy or girl.
If/when he asks for it cutting he can have it cut.

Elmo230885 · 28/10/2022 18:25

Just to add, I don't tend to correct people if they mistake him for a girl. I'd never want anyone to feel bad about it.

PrestonNorthHen · 28/10/2022 18:26

Tbh it is just normal toddler hair.
I thought it was going to be really long.
I would have it shaped a little just to round out the straggly bits.

InsertPunHere · 28/10/2022 18:28

It's adorable, leave it.

Lcb123 · 28/10/2022 18:30

Longer hair esp curls is so cute. I’d leave it unless it’s bothering him!

Macaroni46 · 28/10/2022 18:31

If I'm being totally honest, from the photo it just looks a bit messy. Whether boy or girl, I think it could do with a bit of a trim to tidy it up.

Darbs76 · 28/10/2022 18:35

As long as it’s not in his eyes etc

Darbs76 · 28/10/2022 18:37

I’d just trim his fringe a smidgen. My DD’s hair took forever to grow, after 2 son’s I was desperate for it to grow (cut my boy’s hair early on as I’m not personally a fan of long hair on boys but personal choice) and even in a dress people thought she was a boy as she had short hair!

Original poster
Manchestermummax3 · 28/10/2022 18:40

Kanaloa · 28/10/2022 18:15

Don’t cut it if you don’t want to. Personally I don’t mind boys having long hair but often (I work with loads of kids) the mums who gush over their boys’ ‘gorgeous wild curls’ actually have boys that look a bit scruffy. I always look critically and think ‘if this was a girl would people be saying it was cute and she was a surfer dude? Or would they just be saying why is that little girl’s hair all over her face and straggly at the bottom etc?’ I kept all my kids’ hair short when they were little and they know if they grow it long it has to be neat and tied back.

He is an absolute scruff 🤣 his new fave habit is eating his toast & then rubbing his head... I had to bath him again this morning before nursery it looked greasy like I hadn't washed him in weeks!

OP posts:
Energeticenoch · 28/10/2022 18:42

Entirely up to you but most “gorgeous” little kids hair is anything but. It’s usually rather ratty and nowhere near as attractive as the parents think. Doesn’t need to be really short but I never ever think toddler curls are cute,

Original poster
Manchestermummax3 · 28/10/2022 18:43

Macaroni46 · 28/10/2022 18:31

If I'm being totally honest, from the photo it just looks a bit messy. Whether boy or girl, I think it could do with a bit of a trim to tidy it up.

Oh it def is messy lol
It has a mind of its own, also, he's constantly rubbing food/hands in his hair (lovely new habit 😒🤣)
That was also his 2nd jumper of the day, by 9am because he'd got the one that had been on less than an hour filthy.

OP posts:
Original poster
Manchestermummax3 · 28/10/2022 18:43

Energeticenoch · 28/10/2022 18:42

Entirely up to you but most “gorgeous” little kids hair is anything but. It’s usually rather ratty and nowhere near as attractive as the parents think. Doesn’t need to be really short but I never ever think toddler curls are cute,

Each to their own I guess :)

OP posts:
Needmorelego · 28/10/2022 18:44

From your picture I wouldn't even say that looks like 'long' hair. It looks like pretty much every toddler boy I see (except for the poor bald born ones who haven't caught up...)

MovingOnUpp · 28/10/2022 18:44

I was like this with my DS’s but then when they did have a hair cut they looked even more handsome (which I didn’t think was possible).

maddiemookins16mum · 28/10/2022 18:45

The best compromise would be not to cut it per se, but to tidy it up (a wee trim). You may find that is actually grows quicker and stronger (and curlier 🥰) with the ends/fringe tidied.

Original poster
Manchestermummax3 · 28/10/2022 18:45

PrestonNorthHen · 28/10/2022 18:26

Tbh it is just normal toddler hair.
I thought it was going to be really long.
I would have it shaped a little just to round out the straggly bits.

That's exactly my point, people are reacting like it's halfway down his back already. He's only 14 months lol

OP posts:
Original poster
Manchestermummax3 · 28/10/2022 18:46

On the flip side, I also have a 14 year old son... who wants to go to the barbers every 2 weeks for a skin fade.

OP posts:
Notepadfrog · 28/10/2022 18:56

Energeticenoch · 28/10/2022 18:42

Entirely up to you but most “gorgeous” little kids hair is anything but. It’s usually rather ratty and nowhere near as attractive as the parents think. Doesn’t need to be really short but I never ever think toddler curls are cute,

I regularly get stopped my strangers to tell me how gorgeous my DS’s curls are, his hair is down his back when it’s wet but not even shoulder length when dry, he’s 4 and never had it cut.