Letter from neighbour

[CrispsAndChoc]

We’ve just had a letter saying that residents of my street are fed up with us and the disruption our work vans are causing. There’s no name or door number (it was delivered by the postman) so we can’t knock and apologise. It’s made me feel awful in our new home and I don’t know what to do!

For background-we moved in earlier this year to a very run down house down a road of lovely houses. Since we moved in, we’ve had lots of work done but it’s only been one van outside and no skips. A few (maybe 6) neighbours have commented on how lovely the house is looking and that they’ve never seen anything be done to it in years.

During The last few weeks, a few jobs have accidentally overlapped and there have been more vans and a skip on the drive meaning we can’t park on it. The vans are never parked over driveways but have occasionally been opposite one which can make it difficult (but not impossible) for people to get in and out of their drive. A couple of weeks ago, a neighbour had a go at me for parking opposite her driveway and I haven’t done so since despite it being a legal parking space that others have parked in since.

The majority of the work is now finished meaning there is only one van most days but the skip is still on the drive for a few more days.

I appreciate that it’s annoying when work is being done somewhere but my thoughts are that people should realise it’s only temporary and speak to us about problems they may have so we can rectify them rather than shout or send anonymous letters. AIBU

I don't for one minute think all the neighbours are fed up. They are lying. I would worry about it. You are doing what you have to do.

We get notes on cars in our street when we park outside a specific house. The guy is a dick. He has a drive for 3 cars at the end of his block (2 houses away) but insists the space outside his house belongs to him. He parks so that his passenger door is directly opposite is gate so the wife doesn't have to walk far (she has no mobility issues).

People are nobs.

I go to work with the car and my husband works from home. When I’m not at work, I either park over our own driveway (because the skip is on it), on the driveway (if there is no skip) or around the corner. I asked one contractor to move as they were partially over a driveway but that’s the only one that either I or my husband have seen parking inconsiderately.

I would ignore it. It’s quite obvious that the work won’t go on forever.

I would really just ignore it - what a cock womble. Would they rather the house stayed a dump. This time next year will be forgotten. I am dreading my work being done as it is major and likely looking at lots of deliveries and contractors vans but we will move our cars out so they can at least use the drive which takes two big vans and or deliveries. But we are a small lane of 7 houses and others have had lots of vans and deliveries etc. We are all currently friendly but who knows after this lot is done.

Just ignore it, you have to get the work done, they're being cowardly assholes

We moved into our home last year and did about six months worth of work to it but mentioned any particularly noisy work to our neighbours in advance and dropped chocs round halfway through and at the end to thank them for their patience. We also said to knock on the door if any tradesmen were blocking access or parking where they shouldn't. Relations have been good and we've seemingly managed to keep them on side. We only have 2 close neighbours though. So I'd suggest, if you can afford it, to drop some chocs over and a handwritten note thanking them for their patience. I suspect it'll go a long way to keeping them friendly

Chocolate to who though, she doesn't know who sent the note!

@Cigarettesaftersex1 the closest 3/4 neighbours. Or even just a note. I would personally be more tolerant of works next door if the neighbour had communicated with me

You can be almost certain that the fed-up 'residents of your street' will amount to one or two homes. Three at a push. That's why it's anonymous because the miserable git that started the moan, couldn't rally enough people to make any sort of credible street-wide complaint.

Testina's suggestion is a good one and I would do this for the sake of showing that I am a decent person who cares about my neighbours and is planning on cultivating good neighbourly relations, and also to weed out the moan-bag. I bet you lots of people will come back to say that had no issue.

If you want to reference the fact that other vans (from other jobs) are often parked near your house, that's fine - but having just renovated a mess of a house, for a year in our residential street, most people will just be glad to see the house being made handsome again.

Why would you give people chocolates because workmen are parking their vans on a public road and there's a skip on the drive? Anyone with commonsense will know that the work is coming to an end, no one is going to have their home being renovated on a permanent basis.

I bet the same neighbour was moaning about the state of the house when it needed doing up, some people can't stop moaning.

I like Testina's response too, but in reality I'd bin it and do nothing because I wouldn't find the time (yes, too busy mumsnetting!).

I think the works vans would need to be parked nearer but the OP certainly should be parking further away to ease r congestion as obviously these works have been going on a while.

I'd knock on your immediate neighbours (either side, and across the road) and whoever is most likely to be impacted by the vans & parking etc. Just say thanks for bearing with you, you appreciate it's been a long job but hopefully the end is in sight and the finished house should be worth it (to the character of the road as well).

I wouldn't photocopy the note and put it round everywhere, or even mention the note. That might open the other neighbour's eyes to the fact that one of them finds it all a big pain and it might open a discussion between the longer standing neighbours behind your back to find out who is the sender. People love gossip, don't give them any.

If you’re very close to completion I would ignore it. Photocopying it and distributing it to all the neighbours is passive aggressive and could make relations worse. It is very disruptive when houses have major/long term work done and it’s clearly getting to at least one person. Accept that, but at the same time know you are doing your best and it will all be over soon anyway. Maybe mention in conversation that you will be done soon and that information will placate whoever this is.

Oh and I'd also be really pleasant in tone.

Dentist it's a chance for a bit of positive PR to address it in a non-confrontational way if she has a face to face general pleasant chat with the neighbours. We have a house that has had a lot of work nearby and the neighbour has not fawned/apologised as such but has at least popped over once or twice to say thanks for bearing with them. It does help smooth ruffled feelings.

Stick a message on FB. Apologise, than them for their patience, and tell them the work is nearly finished.

It is a pain, but it can't be helped, and surely they will be happier with a well-maintained house on the street rather than one which is an eyesore and which may even affect the value of their own property (especially those either side and directly opposite).

you've done nothing wrong op. You are perfectly entitled to put a skip on your drive and for trades to park in the street.

Sounds like the only person who’s expressed dissatisfaction is that one woman who had a go for parking over the road from her.

I think that would be a good starting point if you wanted to talk to whoever sent it.

This is genius. ✔️

A couple of weeks ago, a neighbour had a go at me for parking opposite her driveway and I haven’t done so since despite it being a legal parking space that others have parked in since

It might be legal but it's not sensible, especially if someone has driven in and needs to reverse out. I never park opposite a driveway unless there's really no alternative and they've reversed in so can drive out easily.

To be honest OP I find van drivers park all over the place in a discourteous manner and I suspect your neighbour is at the end of their tether but thought they'd get a mouthful if they spoke to you.

Ignore them. Anonymous letters belong in the bin or if they are threatening, with the police. We all have to do work on our homes from time to time and as long as the tradesmen don’t block any drives or start drilling at 6am on a Sunday, your neighbour (and it’s only one of them) is being unreasonable by moaning about it.

not in a way that stops the neighbours going about their business easily though

On Facebook? Unless you have a very organised street who have put together a group I doubt very much anyone would see it.

Are you ‘friends’ on Facebook with all your neighbours?

If they had balls they'd come and talk to you, throw the letter in the bin and think nothing more of it.