To never stay at parents house again?

[MeowMeowPowerRangers]

Came to visit my parents for a few days with DC.

They have seem to have forgotten over the years how much hard work kids can be! Especially small children!

All I've had constantly is "be quiet DS6" "why doesn't he ever be quiet?!" He's just making quiet noises while playing not harming anyone! Becoming quite irate that he won't sit silently he's SIX for goodness sake!
He asks for a drink (quite important imo as he suffers with severe constipation) and I get "he doesn't need another bloody drink!" He asks for a biscuit at 7pm "you don't need one you had one this morning!"

This morning he was up at 10am, and they are loosing their rag with him wondering why he won't go to sleep at 8pm?!

AIBU to never stay over again? Still have a few more days of this and I just want to go home ughh! Apart from this I love my parents but I feel so uncomfortable and put off.

How bad are they 'losing their rag' and is your son noticing? If possible I would go home. I wouldn't stay for at least another year, or just overnight.

Shouting at him, constantly telling him off. Thing is they live so far away we can't just see them for the day. So means not seeing them at all for at least a year. Only seen them twice this year! You'd think they have more bloody patience.

Your poor son go home for gods sake

Sounds pretty fraught and joyless. I’d consider going home.

My family are like this. We don't really stay much. They haven't given any thought to why. Although they aren't happy about it

If they are shouting at him I would leave. You have to ask yourself why you are putting up with that, it is not normal.

YANBU, I find kids quite trying but this is just really horrible, poor kid.

Your poor son. I'd go home and never stay with them again.

I wouldn’t bother staying the last few days to be honest. Why are you allowing them to lose their rag with him?

Yeah go home, it’s not fair to expect him to out up with this.

Just leave - sounds like such a horrible atmosphere. Your poor DS being shouted at for asking for a drink.

Can't get home. No train tickets available.

They have apologised for telling him off but then just carry on doing the same thing.

They've told me to leave him to it and go sit with them but I've just said I'd rather sit with him.

Three options:
1- you leave without saying anything.
2- you have a chat with them when ds is asleep. You're polite and assertive about the impact of their behaviour on your trip. If they don't improve, you leave.
3-you stay and say nothing.

1 is passive aggressive and will leave your parents wondering.
2 is awkward but long term has the potential to sort the issue forever.
3 is shit for your ds.

Completely empathise with you!

Don't stay at theirs again. If they are far and you need to stay to visit then find a holiday home or hotel. If that means visiting fewer times due to cost then atleast when you do visit you will enjoy it more and can leave theirs at any time to go back to your accomodation. It's probably as awful for your DC as it is for you having to put up with their nitpicking. If they ask why you aren't staying, tell them.

If you can meet halfway at a country park with a nice café/pub then even better! Wear the DCs out on scooters/in the park, grandparents get to see them in short bursts so probably better quality time and you can go back to your home after 🤣

I can't stand intolerant people but it will probably be me in another 30 years when ive lost my patience with everything haha!

I find my family like the idea of us coming to stay a lot more.than the reality.

Sod that. Leave.

Go to a hotel this evening and then decide if you'll go home or somewhere else in a hotel for a mini break or if you'll stay nearby and just see them briefly for a walk or something over the next couple of days.

Book a hotel if you can’t go home. Sod that for a game of soldiers.
I wouldn’t let anyone speak to my child like that.

He will remember, and he will remember that you didn’t protect him. Step in and take him away from the situation.

See when they come to stay with us I refuse and say no room need a b&B and it works out great! I say I'll come down and get an B&B and it's like "oh no we can't expect you to do that!"

To be fair last time we visited they were a lot better and rarely told him off, but they could escape outside most of the time due to it being summer.
I just feel fucking awkward.

Make plans to take him out for the day tomorrow. And the next day. Until it's home time.

Don't come back.

As pp suggests, meet up at a half way point in future.

I’d say, “Your impatience with (son) regarding his normal six year old behaviour seems disproportionate. I love you but it’s making me uncomfortable and we’re not enjoying our stay. I think it’s for the best if we cut this visit short and go home.”

Just be honest.

I think you need to chat about this for your future relationship

Oh you can’t go home.
Then go out.

Also if you want to challenge them on it during this stay, I'd suggest phrasing it along the lines of "Mum, are you not enjoying us staying here for this visit?" they may answer honestly that they're finding it overwhelming or they may be caught off guard by your question. You can then point out they've said X, Y, Z to the DC and you've just noticed they seem irritated - would they prefer you cut your visit shorter and stayed elsewhere in the future?

Find somewhere else to stay if you can't get home. Or book a coach if you have to. Poor little bugger having to put up with that.

Just stay out the way and leave the visiting for a while.