To think people wouldn’t like dogs if they could talk

[DonnaBanana]

I am not a dog person. But I know lots of people who are and they commonly say the thing they love about dogs (as compared to children, for example) is how their love is unconditional and they don’t speak or share their opinions with you like people do.

That seemed a bit sad to me. It seems like saying having a dog is mostly good because it can’t talk or share its opinions (and as a sentient animal it surely has some) but if it could, it would become annoying and undesirable.

Would you still have a dog if it spoke its mind?

Mine lie. They frequently tell me they haven't been fed/walked/patted despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary.

With some people daft enough to put Johnson forward again for PM, they seem perfectly qualified to be on the ballot.

Social media causes me to doubt that any animal could spout more shite than some human ones.

I never yet met a dog that needed to use its words. They have numerous other ways to make their views and opinions perfectly clear.

" Call that a walk? "
"I don't like him; get rid".
"Not eating that crap. Don't buy that brand again".
"I crapped because you didn't listen to the above".

My doggins speaks in a German accent 😇

My dog can say hello (kind of. She only says it to my mum when she visits, and it’s in the middle of all sorts of other noises. My mum tells her to be quiet, so it’s unappreciated ☹️)

DS and I mainly voice the dog’s thoughts. Her voice sounds like Glenn from Superstore.

My dogs communicate very well.

My god x collie yawns really loudly when he hears me come downstairs even though I know he's already awake and waiting because I can see on the camera. He also whines if one of the other dogs farts as if to tell ne how offended he is
My Spaniel grunts and groans when she's scratching her ear and I quite clearly hear "oh yeaaaaah" . If I say excuse me to she steps to one side and bobs her head, she's apologising for being in my way.
Terrier growls at me when he wants to play, it's a very specific growl. He also creeps really slowly towards you if he wants a cuddle but doesn't want to be rejected, he puts his throat on your face - which is him exposing a vulnerable part to say he's not a threat.
Then the collie sits on my son when I say bedtime, because he doesn't want him to go.

And my cats are even more expressive - if I catch my adolescent male doing something he shouldn't he narrows his eyes at me!

My dog absolutely can talk. He frequently tells me to fuck off.

Dogs are much more adept at sharing their thoughts than maybe some people think.

But I don't have a dog so I have something to love me unconditionally. I don't need unconditional love. I love my dog unconditionally instead. And certainly prefer his company to humans.

Wow! That would be brilliant. How long did it take?

@ZeldaWillTellYourFortune see www.hungerforwords.com/ will tell you everything

My beagle definitely knows how to talk

My dog communicates pretty well. I would love for him to be able to tell me about his past though, it would explain some of his behaviour and I could reassure him that nobody will be unkind to him ever again.

I work with animals and enjoy their company, you learn so much from them.

Google dog talking buttons.

People have taught their dogs to communicate, some of them do whole sentences!

My dog 'spoke' and he also learned a fair list of words and phrases. I was teaching English abroad when we found him and he came home with us. As the children at school were learning new vocabulary, I decided to teach the dog too, holding up an object and using repetition. He knew all his meat words and his reactions told us that steak was his favourite. One of my favourites that he picked up on was when I taught him first 'dog' and then 'shop', then put them together, 'dog shop', and he knew that we were going to a pet food shop to get him some treats and he was coming too. He used to get so excited at that.

Another favourite was when I used to light the fire on winter days and he'd come into the room, see what I was doing, and do a huff of satisfaction and then sit and watch the fire get started.

Some people would do better to start with learning human body language first. Many seem oblivious to how someone is feeling just by watching their body language. It's becoming a lost skill. Once you have that you can pretty much communicate or 'talk' with any creature. My pet hens are very intelligent, you just need to patiently watch them and interact.

I would love for him to be able to tell me about his past

In his own way my dog did tell us about his past. We gradually figured out that he'd lived with a family and been thrown out. He loved small children but was frightened of people with grey hair, especially those wielding brooms. That he'd been locked on a balcony, which terrified him, and he'd hurt his tail when a door blew shut on it. That he'd been left thirsty, so learned to ration water until we got him a water tower and made sure it never got low.

Keep watching, MyGirlDaisy, your dog will tell you.

This talking pet malarkey - be careful what you wish for ...
www.eastoftheweb.com/short-stories/UBooks/Tob.shtml

I love that Saki story!

It's great innit - & I love a sarcastic pet full stop @Handyweatherstation

It's great innit

It's absolutely wonderful 😘

He also told us, often, that he loved us, by gazing adoringly and then melting with pleasure when his head was stroked.

I loved my Beagle's constant stream of consciousness. Grumble, grumble, witter, what you doing? oh, I like that, urrrgggghhh, life's so tough, why do you have to be soooo unreasonable SQUIRREL IN THE GARDEN, THERE'S A BIRD OUT THERE, what's for dinner? can I have snacks, you won't mind sharing, where's mine? CAT! No, not the cat, she's grumpy and scary and she keeps sleeping in my bed and she can go anywhere she likes, I mean CAT! There's one on a fence two doors down and it's looking at our air! Oh, why is my life so hard? Ooooft, I suppose I'll just have to have a sleep here, was that a food wrapper? Did you think of going to the fridge? The cat's eating my food again, make her stop, please?

I love Beagles for their talkativeness. And even the OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW. As long as it's not at the front window with the lethal weapon that is their tail wreaking havoc behind them and against your shins.

Laughing at this.

That sums up beagle ownership perfectly

I know what all his different barks and whines and huffs mean as well, and I know if I ask him certain questions, he'll make certain noises, haha.

@Saisong I was going to bring up Bunny. I too was sceptical at first but at this point I think its undeniable that she is using symbolic language to some degree. I think she might be an especially intelligent dog though. Most of what she thinks about is pretty pure and innocent but she also uses 'love you' to manipulate her owners. On the other hand, we don't actually know what she understands by 'love you'. Maybe to her its just a 'persuasion' button.

Most animals are better than humans, especially dogs, they don’t judge, they have huge capacity for love and empathy.
I would love to have had conversations with my dogs over the years, however they knew they were loved & loved us so that’s all that matters to me.

I think maybe you are misunderstanding what people mean. It's not that we love our dogs because they can't express themselves. They express themselves very well without words. They do have 'opinions' about things, in a basic doggy way, and they usually make them very clear!

If my dog could talk, I don't think I'd be the least bit surprised by any of his opinions . They would mostly be about how much he loves us, how much he enjoys food and walks and toys, how excited he is to see us when we get back from going out, how scared he is of the vet's etc.

Tbh it sounds as though, as a dog-disliker, you are trying to come up with ways of convincing dog-lovers that they don't really like having dogs, or that their reasons for loving having a dog are somehow 'wrong'... which is a weird thing for you to do, and it won't work!